Today, my grandmother gave me rosary beads for my birthday. She told me I'd better start praying for a husband. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I told my grandma my boyfriend had cheated on me. She told me that it was my fault for not straightening my hair, and for gaining a few pounds. FML
Today, I'm the only grandchild who regularly visits, calls, and runs errands for my grandparents, even though I live two hours away. I'm also their biggest disappointment because I'm not married. FML
Today, my wife and I decided to celebrate Christmas Eve with her side of the family. When we arrived at her parents' house, I heard her mother say that Christmas miracles don't exist since my wife brought me along. FML
Today, I was insulted and harassed by my sister and her boyfriend, all because I proposed yesterday. They were angry I might get married before they did. They have known each other since primary school; I met my fiancée earlier this year. FML
Today, I went to my grandmother's house to pick up her cat to take him to the vet. She forgot who I was and sprayed me in the face with pepper spray. FML
Today, I got a ransom note saying, "We have kidnapped your husband and won't release him unless you postpone the wedding." The wedding is tomorrow and it was in his handwriting. FML
Today, it was my girlfriend's birthday. She decided that her "gift to herself" would be to leave the loser who has been holding her back for two years. Hello, my name is Ben, and I'm that loser. FML
Today, my husband and I woke up to see my drunk mother passed out on our couch. She was wearing nothing but socks. FML
Today, my mother gave me a bottle of stool softeners as a gift at my baby shower. FML
Today, while my husband and I were arguing, he walked away in the middle of my sentence yelling, "Remember babe, you're only my current wife!" FML
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Top comments
bluecat_fml 0
grandma humor, never gets old :P
aardvarkish 17
I think I would have said, "Don't worry. My boyfriend promised to leave his wife, stop selling drugs, and then marry me."
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Comments (77)
oogie_boggie 0
well then what are you do doing writing an fml. stop wasting time and PREY LOL
nadia716 3
Ouch lol. Old people are so mean sometimes. It's ok OP, I'll be your husband ;] haha.
fullmetalshrimp 0
Haha, that's cute.
MEF62 5
depending on what birthday she's at. if it's 16 then weird. 20 it's cute. 30+ it's pathetic
Emrysa 1
Well, I was going to say give her a set and tell her to start praying she lives another year. But #1's suggestion is better. Win.
Lukee 0
Granny can't live with her can't live without her
katelynjoy 0
lol!!
Jimboom 12
Tell her to keep them because if you started praying now then you wouldn't be able to see her again in hell when you die.
FirstBornUnicorn 0
Oh Grandma,
memo619 0
lmao epic win #1 ^^
FYLDeep 26
This isn't a good sign for sure. But... if a couple more years down the line, you're mother does the same, then you know you're totally ******.
goldendoodle95 0
grandmothers crack me up they're hilarious