Today, my girlfriend tried to cover my eyes while I was driving on the main street, all because she caught me looking at an ad featuring bikini-clad girls on the bus ahead of our car. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was cuddling my girlfriend. The TV was on behind me, with some kind of girl's basketball game playing. When I stared into my girlfriend's eyes, she accused me of trying to check out the girls by looking at their reflection in her eyes. FML
Today, I was on the bus, heading to work, when the girl beside me started yelling at me, claiming I was staring down her shirt. I did no such thing, but the driver nonetheless stopped the bus and made me get off, all under the withering glares of the other passengers. FML
Today, my boyfriend took me on a drive while he did some errands. I waited for him in the car with my bare feet on his dashboard, like I usually do. As I waited, I noticed a woman blatantly taking pictures of my feet from across the lot, and she winked at me. I cowered in my seat until he came back. FML
Today, my husband managed to crash the car because he was too busy looking at an attractive girl with her leggings wedged up her ass crack, and I know he only crashed because he was looking at her, because I was in the car with him when it happened. FML
Today, while driving home from work, I saw my boyfriend mugging a woman on the sidewalk. FML
Today, I was driving to work, following my girlfriend's car. I looked down to change the radio station and felt a large bump. I rear-ended my girlfriend. FML
Today, my girlfriend tried to look at my phone and I turned it away from her. Now she’s convinced I’m cheating on her. In reality, I’m too embarrassed to admit it’s because Facebook is showing me nonstop ads for laxatives after I ordered some two days ago. FML
Today, I saw a woman still texting on her phone as she started to drive away when the light turned green. I made sure to stare her down and give her a dirty look because she wasn't paying attention to driving. She laughed as I rear-ended the car in front of me. FML
Today, on the bus, I caught the eye of this ugly, sweaty girl giving me a death stare through the driver's mirror. I gave her a death stare back. Only then I realized I was staring at myself. FML
Today, I was catching the bus to my new job. While waiting at the lights, I decided to play the staring game and ended up staring at a woman in the car next to the bus for ages, really creeping her out. It turns out she's my new boss. FML
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Top comments
borntoperform 14
I guess she didn't think that one through...
djwilson50 3
Sounds like shes feeling insecure!
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Comments (170)
jillianmathers12 13
She is very smart!
moop256 10
I think she is teaching him to use his other senses to drive... You know in case he goes blind
docscientist 10
Ironic, if you crashed into the bus, and 20 bikini clad women rolled out. Or maybe that's just party-time.
FYLDeep 26
Not many men have rear-ended that many women before.
kkows25 10
I see what you did there
twofirstnames 12
That's not dangerous or stupid at all...
majorbob10 0
Now where the hell do you drive?
twofirstnames 12
Have you heard of sarcasm? Haha of course it's stupid and dangerous!
himoonkey 8
At least you didint crash
ThaBeasty01 5
or did he .. ?
upyourzlolz 11
Well she only did it for fifteen minutes, and like a good neighbor, she'll always be there. However, I don't think you're in good hands.
HaraAishi 8
Nice 24.
alanalovesyou 0
I hope you didn't crash.
crystalnight 19
That relationship will be the death of you.
DirtyvonZoe32 10
those stupid ads can cause harm to your pretty little PG eyes.
1JDub 6
Wow, shes a keeper...FHL or FYL for staying with the psycho!
racheljessie 17
Like a good neighbor, State Farm is there...with a less jealous girlfriend!