Today, my girlfriend tried to cover my eyes while I was driving on the main street, all because she caught me looking at an ad featuring bikini-clad girls on the bus ahead of our car. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was cuddling my girlfriend. The TV was on behind me, with some kind of girl's basketball game playing. When I stared into my girlfriend's eyes, she accused me of trying to check out the girls by looking at their reflection in her eyes. FML
Today, I was on the bus, heading to work, when the girl beside me started yelling at me, claiming I was staring down her shirt. I did no such thing, but the driver nonetheless stopped the bus and made me get off, all under the withering glares of the other passengers. FML
Today, my boyfriend took me on a drive while he did some errands. I waited for him in the car with my bare feet on his dashboard, like I usually do. As I waited, I noticed a woman blatantly taking pictures of my feet from across the lot, and she winked at me. I cowered in my seat until he came back. FML
Today, my husband managed to crash the car because he was too busy looking at an attractive girl with her leggings wedged up her ass crack, and I know he only crashed because he was looking at her, because I was in the car with him when it happened. FML
Today, while driving home from work, I saw my boyfriend mugging a woman on the sidewalk. FML
Today, I was driving to work, following my girlfriend's car. I looked down to change the radio station and felt a large bump. I rear-ended my girlfriend. FML
Today, my girlfriend tried to look at my phone and I turned it away from her. Now she’s convinced I’m cheating on her. In reality, I’m too embarrassed to admit it’s because Facebook is showing me nonstop ads for laxatives after I ordered some two days ago. FML
Today, I saw a woman still texting on her phone as she started to drive away when the light turned green. I made sure to stare her down and give her a dirty look because she wasn't paying attention to driving. She laughed as I rear-ended the car in front of me. FML
Today, on the bus, I caught the eye of this ugly, sweaty girl giving me a death stare through the driver's mirror. I gave her a death stare back. Only then I realized I was staring at myself. FML
Today, I was catching the bus to my new job. While waiting at the lights, I decided to play the staring game and ended up staring at a woman in the car next to the bus for ages, really creeping her out. It turns out she's my new boss. FML
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Top comments
borntoperform 14
I guess she didn't think that one through...
djwilson50 3
Sounds like shes feeling insecure!
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Comments (170)
PeypeyTheBeeotch 1
next time she's driving do the same and see how she likes it?
desireev 18
Yeah! Because the first time wasn't scary enough!! Let's do that again! Just to spite the bitch!! C'mon... Really?!
lajaynay 15
She's 14 and still uses the word, "beeotch" she is obviously too young to understand driving. Still a stupid comment though.
Shadow_Blues 10
At the risk of sounding repetitive... Are you nuts?! xD
AyeeArieel 5
Well shes a smart apple
KVKdragon 26
Your girlfriend is a freaking idiot
HeXr 22
That could potentially have been a good exercise of Darwinism if you weren't also in the car. I hope you two don't plan on having kids
DevilsMetsGiants 30
oh yeah, she's a keeper
Omega_Mus 7
objects appear closer when you cover your eyes, and then re-open them. especially if your in a moving vehicle. even more so if your driving.
lilpowers 3
If you were just looking at the road ahead you then that's fine but if you were drooling that's another story
KiddNYC1O 22
Bitches are psycho.
nsnforever 2
Yeah, OP sure picked a winner there! She sounds like my ex girlfriend. Sorry about that, OP. Hope you're okay!
vasthamira 0
Someone isn't too bright...