Today, My girlfriend came from behind me and put her hand in my back pockets. I though it was someone trying to take my wallet, I elbowed her in the nose and broke it. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I tickled my girlfriend, and her first reflex was to swing her elbow back and break my nose. FML
Today, I was in school when I spotted my girlfriend in the hallway. I wanted to be all romantic and grab her like guys do in movies. I grabbed her wrist forcefully and pulled her out of the crowd. As I quickly leaned in to kiss her, I broke her nose. FML
Today, I spotted my girlfriend in a store. She didn't notice me, so I went behind her, put my hands over her eyes, and said "Guess who." I got an elbow to the groin and mace to the face. While I was rolling on the ground in pain, she simply said, "Serves you right" and walked away. FML
Today, my girlfriend asked me to hold her purse while shopping. All of a sudden, a robber punched me in the face and took her purse. She started crying about her purse and told me to get off the ground because I was embarrassing her. FML
Today, my girlfriend snuck up behind me to cover my eyes and play "guess who." The second her hands touched my face, I grabbed her, twisted her wrists, and kneed her to the floor out of instinct. FML
Today, I went to the movies with my girlfriend. As I started putting my arm around her, I hit her in the face. FML
Today, I was horsing around after my big test. Someone punched me softly on my back. Figuring it was my friend, I turned around and did a roundhouse kick. It was my girlfriend. FML
Today, while my girlfriend and I were making out, she went to fix the pillow behind her head and punched me straight in the face. FML
Today, my girlfriend's ex punched me so hard in the face, I couldn't see straight. But I got up anyway. I lunged at him, and nailed him in the jaw. Turns out I'd in fact just knocked out my girlfriend the on-looker. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were walking around when she got lost in a crowd. And me, being a pig, playfully grabbed her butt. I realized it wasn't hers when the guy whose butt I'd grabbed by accident knocked me unconscious. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
JustAGirl_fml 0
F HER life, not yours.
magnusip 0
damn. talking bout fast reaction.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (43)
cmac86 24
she deserves it. I'd have done the same thing.
MAkisahomie 0
oh shit you like it rough I see ;) hahahaah
ajthere4u 0
**** her life!!!!
alan1011 0
lol number 1 anyway she shouldn't hav had her hands in ur pocket
Randalltk421 0
Chances are that if someone is going to take your wallet from your back pocket, you're not going to feel it. But I think I might have reacted the same way...depending on where I was. Were you standing in your kitchen??!
little_metalbear 0
well, at least you have a good self defence mechanism.. shame you had to find it out on your gf xD
JOeL850 0
Lmao
Urbanchiller 0
What?! wallet and the ass pocket goes togather like elbow to the nose.
militarybrat 21
Great reflexes though :)
Larco_fml 3
At least now you know she'll probably never try to steal your wallet.