Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. She gave me back the brand new box of 12 condoms that I had bought and left at her house. There were 8 left and I wasn't the one who opened them. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me and refused to give me back the condoms I'd just bought. Why? Because she wants to use them with the guys she's been cheating on me with. FML
Today, my girlfriend of 8 months and I broke up. We decided to give back everything we ever bought for each other. I gave her the stuff she bought me and when I asked for my stuff she said she'd sold it and spent the money on herself. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. By making out with her new boyfriend in front of me. FML
Today, my girlfriend decided to break up with me because she found a bra in my cupboard. It was hers. FML
Today, the condoms I bought a few years ago as a celebration of dumping my girlfriend due to a lack of sex, have expired. Every last one of them. FML
Today, I broke up with my girlfriend. She then proceeded to ask for all the gifts she gave me for Christmas back. FML
Today, I walked in on my girlfriend cheating on me. The guy turned around and said, "Sorry, I borrowed your condoms." FML
Today, I went to my boyfriend's house, with whom I've been with for four years. I've been in Australia for the last two months and before I left, he bought a box of 12 condoms, saying we would use them when I got back. We went to the bedroom and I opened the box. There was one left. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. Her birthday is tomorrow so she sent her new boyfriend to pick up her birthday present. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. Instead of having breakup sex, she tidied my room. She said it gave her more pleasure than any time we'd ever had sex. FML
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Top comments
oooh_dear 0
you need sweet sweet revenge. how close are you to her best friend? ;] just a thought.
reset_button 0
Tell her you found holes in your 8 condoms, and are worried that the others had holes in them too
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Comments (97)
Hong_Kong 0
#11 is a genius
alex_vik 1
You're lucky she broke up with you then.
dcapp 0
hahaha #5 and #11 she probably just took them out to make you think she was having sex with someone else or she jsut wanted to keep them for the future
silentspilla 0
wana have sex?
yourpathetic 0
#11 love the idea, but make it worse, tell her you slept with her bestfriend after a sucky night of sex, and that she might have the same shit as you. not the best, but its a working progress :))
Okeenow 0
I'm surprised she even bothered to give them back
evolveahimsa 0
go with number 11 and let us know how it turns out!
Banthestrandland 0
#30, what the ****? I realize you're joking but that's in as about as poor taste as you can get unless you start joking about the Holocaust.
jayfx 0
you need revenge lol
RhapsodyEternal 0
Watch she poked holes in the remaining 8 condoms XD So then try what #5 said, and get her mom pregnant. Epic. Win.
zomgitsbrilol 0
what were you doing giving her condoms anyway