Today, my girlfriend bought several bottles of Potassium Iodine pills and a gas mask, due to the radiation scare from Japan. We live in Texas. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my girlfriend offered to wash the bathroom while I was at work. I came back home to find her feeling unwell with a bad headache. She had mixed drain cleaner with bleach because she thought it would make the bathroom cleaner. Now my entire house is a mini gas chamber. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I both developed food poisoning from last night's sushi. Our apartment has one bathroom. FML
Today, my girlfriend came back from visiting her family. She'd forgotten to take her pills, and decided to "catch up" by taking almost a week's worth of birth control and prescription pills. She's fine, but I had to convince the ER staff that she's not suicidal, just stupid. FML
Today, I was driving with my boss and she held her breath as we drove past a cell tower, because she didn't want to "breathe in any radiation." I have to take orders from this moron. FML
Today, I had to drive my girlfriend to the hospital because she had a severe allergic reaction to the flowers I brought her. FML
Today, my girlfriend texted me to pick her up some medicine because she’s "all plugged up." When I arrived with laxatives, she yelled at me. She meant her sinuses. FML
Today, my girlfriend was packing for her study abroad program. Jokingly, I got her a pack of condoms. She laughed, saying "Oh yeah, I'll definitely need some of those." Later, I showed up to take her to the airport and saw her open suitcase in the kitchen, with the condoms on top. FML
Today, my dad watched the news and decided to start preparing for Hurricane Sandy by buying $300 worth of long-life and canned food. We live in Australia. FML
Today, while I was working in the drive-through at work, a lady was wearing kitchen oven-mitts and a snorkeling mask instead of gloves and a mask to pick up her prescription. FML
Today, my girlfriend is on her period. She hugged me, crying because she was going to miss me. Where was I going? To the store down the street and back. FML
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Top comments
delyter 0
no offense but ur gf may be a retard
jmrtheman 3
I hope your gf is hella hot to make up how dumb she is.
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Comments (198)
Itstherealjen 0
hahaha! what a sweet girlfriend:s
NickyD2 0
man, ur gf is dingy.
Cutebabysignut 0
Your the retard. It says that california will get radiation in a week and new york in a month. So you will get it in about two weeks.
xoxomisfitxoxo 4
she has more intelligence then the rest if you *****... the sheep are waking up...
docscientist 10
Sounds like you got hit pretty hard by radiation.
feedurhead19 0
lmao !
FireNinja 3
look, does any one know what happens during a meltdown ? guess not sence your saying she's a dumbass for buying that stuff. during s meltdown, the stuff from the reactor goes through the earth into the core. this meltdown isn't just effecting Japan people. IT EFFECTS THE ENTIRE world! she's right to be paranoid. and op, you deserve it , it sounds like she's smarter then you when it comes down to it.
polysyllabist 3
Are you serious? You can't be serious. The "stuff" from the reacotr goes into the earth's core?? Dude, the problem with a 'melt down' has nothing to do with the Earth's core, it would be fine in the core. The problem is it hitting the water table... which while terrible is a local problem.
ideasrule 13
If the containment breaks, radioactive material would also get into the atmosphere and be carried by the trade winds around the world. Of course, the concentration of this material will be so low as to be negligible in the US.
EnterNameHere001 5
You're a dumbass you don't know what the **** you're talking about you so self-absorbed that on a you make everything have to do with you just shut your stupid ******* mouth and don't breed.
Geometric 18
You don't know what the hell you're talking about, do some actual research on the topic before spouting pseudo-science.
dante0220 0
dump her
Miss_Random 0
There are ignorant people living throughout this world. Not just in the US and not just in Texas. I am so sick of these stereotypes! I will admit that those overzealous, patriotic USoffreakinA ignorant types, who believe no other country in the world matters, do exists. But PLEASE do not assume EVERY American is like that.
tbonea1990 0
gas mask bongs work nice
nonameheroes 0
lol....iodine pills wont do anything...she might as swell swallow salt. its iodide pills you want, and even then it only protects your thyroid...what a dumb gf you have...fyl indeed