Today, my friend took me and a bunch of other guys out to a nice dinner. This was his way to say thank you for helping him move to a new apartment. He got the cheque, excused himself to go to the restroom and never came back to pay. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I took a friend out for what I thought was date. After dinner was over and I paid, she pulled the bill out and wrote her name phone number on it for the waiter. FML
Today, I went to dinner with an amazing guy. At the end he said he had to go to the washroom. 15 min later he was still MIA, so I figured he'd ditched me with the bill. I paid and left. 10 min later he texted me, asking where I was. Turns out he hadn't ditched me. He was having "stomach issues." FML
Today, I told a guy that I only see him as a friend. He ordered separate checks because, “I’m not giving boyfriend benefits to a girl who won’t make me one.” I hadn’t brought my card because he always pays for my meal. The restaurant held my phone as collateral until I Ubered 10 miles away to get my card. FML
Today, I went to a restaurant with my boyfriend. After dessert, he went to the bathroom so I quickly called the waiter over and paid the bill, thinking it was a nice gesture. When he returned, he broke up with me for "emasculating" him. FML
Today, I went on a date with a guy who seemed to be quite the gentleman. I was proven wrong when he told me to "shut it" during dinner, stiffed me on the bill, and then left me at the restaurant so he could get his own taxi home. FML
Today, I took a taxi ride with my friends. As we were getting out, I paid the taxi driver. With a grin, he drove away fast. It turns out my friend had already paid. FML
Today, I went on a dinner date with the guy I like. He ate all his food then started eating off my plate, going on to eat over half of my food. When the bill came, he made me pay for it. FML
Today, I went on a date with a guy that I have been crushing on for 2 years. At the end of the date he tells me that he is moving away and as his going away present, I could pay for dinner. FML
Today, my friends took me out to the most expensive restaurant in town to celebrate my promotion, we ordered everything with expensive drinks too. They 'took a smoke break' and left me with the bill. FML
Today, I treated my boyfriend to an expensive dinner using the last of my paycheck. I had to excuse myself to the bathroom a few minutes in. I came back to find my plate empty. His excuse was, "I didn't want the food to get cold." FML
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Top comments
mrbattleman 10
nice friend you've got there
Buttsexpirate 9
That's true friendship right there bro.
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Comments (181)
mrbattleman 10
nice friend you've got there
n_epic_fail 14
He invited you guys to a nice dinner and said thank you, now you want him to PAY?!! That's just about the craziest thing I've ever heard!
Sportsfan86 3
Have all of you guys take him out for dinner again another night as a guys night out, then when the cheque comes, all you guys go to the washroom and leave him and don't come back ;)
rawrkittyrawr 6
Well he did what he said he would do he took you guys out :D
bling87 0
at least you know where he lives (:
LiveLaughFML 10
F is for Friends who do stuff together :D
SCREAM4meeee 0
Maybe he just had extremely painful diarrhea?
hockey199813 5
Nice comment you got their
Feklfekl2222 32
I think this should be the "friends" FML Today, I lost all my friends that helped me out when I really needed them because I am an utter douchebag FML
nikChick447 6
wooow. wudda nice guy.
enonymous 9
This guy is a genius. I really mean it. He dine and dashed and got you to move his stuff into his apt which by the time you go to his place it will now be a 7-11
jonn090 13
he should bust a capnup his ass for doing that. Burn those gypsies
DJJuantioFresh 0
U is for you and me!
hahahahepicfail 0
135 - there us no U in friends
MyScrewedUpLifeS 0
cheque? fancy
CMichael 0
I've never heard of "check" being spelled "cheque" but alright.
13FTW 9
140, obviously you aren't a avid spongebob fun, which is ******* outrageous. That little yellow guy is a boss.
DarkScythe951 4
U is for uranium... BOMBS!
Pandakins12 0
U IS FOR YOU AND MEEEEEE :D
rcbarnes 24
Just "borrow" one of his cards and charge stuff you want 'till you're even.
Lexigrimes 0
Ouch, looks like someone needs to go to the bathroom more offen. (;
thisisafunnyname 12
I think he had to go number two
tellithowitis 13
Or number 3
Blackmail111 9
Or even a number 42
BlacOpsMaximus 5
haha! I'm not sure what that means but you made me lolz ;D
mrosew442 10
126-that's because you mist understand the question before you can understand the answer
drlove78843 6
What is number three:)
GtDriver 6
1+2.
crosado531 0
You mean must
that1guyyy 12
Ask the other guys to pay?
Nanall 15
Or split the tab?
Sae_Ghelk 6
Or split some skulls.
flockz 20
or split THE RED SEA!
Llama_Face89 34
Split an atom?
MagicallyFat 12
Banana split?
anencephalic 14
You're all too half-hearted.
tylersign 11
I like girls who can do the splits?
HideouslyHuman 10
Divide by zero.
ThatOneCanadian 0
its comments like these that make me feel good about spending long periods of time on this website
flockz 20
you mean... there's life outside FML?
TheNewGuy03 29
Or you can just split. (Oh, wait -- that's what the other guy did.) |the kid|
TheNewGuy03 29
MOTHERFUCKING DOUBLE POST.
sierralovesyou 0
Hahaha you guys all just made my day (: thank you!
Sae_Ghelk 6
About time to split, eh? Buggers, didn't see someone posted that above me. It felt so perfect. -LeEdit-
beckybecks20 8
Anybody else notice #3's shirt? The dude in the yellow? o.o
Wheredidgrungego 12
You're welcome!
thisisafunnyname 12
Thats what friends are for
jonn090 13
Grammar baud should just leave
ChaeRi 3
Guess you have to wash dishes to pay it off, huh? Well no problem, Rihanna's here to help. I'm washin dishes up in here, all night (uh-huh) I ain't go stop until I get my money right (uh-huh) I'mma pay it right tonight I'mma pay it right tonight Hope it helps.
sweetheart765 0
U spelled check wrong
Sae_Ghelk 6
You spelled you wrong. And failed at correcting someone.
sportsy 7
You failed at proper grammar. Never start a sentience with and
twilight_lupus 13
If you're going to correct someone use real words not 'text language'.
melonrind 8
You're a jack ass.....God forbid someone uses proper American English spelling....
DocBastard 40
I'm guessing the spelling of "cheque" was changed by one of the "international" mods, as OP is from the US. Either that or our Kentuckian OP is an international man of mystery.
twilight_lupus 13
Sportsy.... If you're going to correct someone's grammar please spell sentence correctly..... Also your lacking a period at the end of your sentence.
jonn090 13
Nazis*
Buttsexpirate 9
That's true friendship right there bro.
Lexigrimes 0
Your name.. IS AMAZING. xD
midnightsky1 3
:[ don't worry, karma will get him sooner or later.
G97Alex 21
Not trying to sound like an asshole but can people stop commenting about how karma will get the person? It becomes really annoying when 80% of all FMLs have the same type of comment without any originality.
amayasoma 19
Well when most of the FML's end with the OP getting screwed over by friends, family, or a lover "karma" is the most appropriate thing to say in such a case.
IndiRae 9
Not trying to sound like an asshole, but can people stop pulling random statistics out of their ass? It becomes really annoying. When 93.4% of people bitch about the stupidest shit.
SimoneDymond 3
Lmao good one! 89
omfgfmlife 0
why wait for a supernatural force to take action? they know where he lives so break his legs >:O
Alexisthebestest 16
83% of all statistics are made up.
knight0748 5
Actually, karma can't "get" anyone. Karma is the concept of cause and effect. It's not related to the idea of good and evil. Karma is not some divine power of retribution siding with you because the cashier short changed you.
saIty 17
Karma peed on my leg. Oh, forgot to mention that I have a dog named Karma.
docscientist 10
If karma supposedly gets everyone, then karma got every single one of the posters of the fmls and they all deserved it.
Lemycakes 4
What a lamo...
Teehee2 0
what's a lamo?
brianjman14 23
I think he/she meant lame-o. I'm not sure.
rayrayray23 1
Lmfao(;
False_Stupidity 42
Some other comment explained it... Something about a llama-moron cross or similar.
sillyciara 6
Yikes.. dine n dashes are fun. As long as you remember to dash.
jonn090 13
Don't worry pay the bill then later assembly the crew and beat his ass for the money