Jes
Today, my father called me to ask what my middle name is. He apparently needed to know it to remove me out from his will. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
ItGirl
Eskilstuna, Sweden
Today, my dad got so drunk that he forgot my name. He started calling me "It". FML
Jololol
United States
Today, I found out I was named after the woman my dad used to stalk when he was in high school. FML
Anonymous
Johannesburg, South Africa
Today, my estranged father, with whom I haven't spoken in years, called me and demanded to know where his Father's Day gift was. FML
Anonymous
Minneapolis, United States
Unreasonable
Today, my father-in-law decided to disown myself and his son, because my husband decided to hyphenate his last name. FML
lawoman27
United States
Today, I found out I was named after the woman my dad was having an affair on my mom with. FML
forgottendaughter
South Africa
Today, my father asked me to never contact him again. The reason? His "new" family doesn't know I exist and explaining that he has a 28 year-old daughter to his wife and his other children would be "awkward". I have siblings that I will never meet. FML
Johndoe
Good boy
Today, my dad called my by the family dog's name, and stared at me blankly as if struggling to remember my name when I was annoyed. FML
Anonymous
Today, my father told me that it wasn't that I was written out of his will, it's that he never thought to include me in the first place. FML
rejectedson
This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff
United States
Nice to know
Today, my father got married. He left me a voicemail to tell me all about it. FML
Florida
United States
Today, my husband informed me that his father adopted a dog. I replied "Cool," he then said, "She happens to have your name." I think my father in law is trying to send me a message. FML
Top comments
Miss_Whipped 43
OP, If I were in your shoes and that were my father, I'd tell him to take his will and shove it where the sun don't shine. Any father that can't remember his own daughter's middle name - and certainly only asks for it for a selfish reason - doesn't deserve her time anyway. Maybe I'm being harsh but I certainly don't think he's the kind of father I'd want in my life.
JBChristian 47
Killing anybody isn't particularly something to joke about, but we do it everyday. Jokes usually are about things that shan't be joked about, that's what makes them funny; because it's just a joke.
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Comments (41)
ezrajab 22
Let him figgure out your middle name on his own! And tell him to stop being an officious prick
DMC0821 19
Let him know that if he removes you from the will, his grave will be in the backyard and his casket will be a cardboard box.
AssCancer 5
This doesn't add up, so he has your middle name on the will, so he needs to know what it is to get it off. First he would need to know it to put it on, or if a lawyer wrote it he would know what it was in the context of your name. So either this is a flat out stupid lie, or your dad is just dumb and doesn't know that the name in between the other two names is the middle name
EvilLittleMan 23
Go out, be successful, change the world and put him to shame.
4everBroken 13
I would tell him to guess until he gets it right or suffer. Sorry anyone that much of an ass doesn't deserve to keep their money. You may not owe your kids much but as a PARENT of you don't care how well off your kids are than you shouldn't have had any, anyways. Since it's too late for that why would you tell him? He doesn't care to remember it must not be his concern
sohigh10 34
'If I'm no longer in the will, there's no point in waiting for natural causes.'
epicgamer 18
I hate how everybody is quick to assume that you are the victim. There's probably a reason he doesn't want you in his will. You're probably a gold digging bitch. YDI.
dave__609 10
Say it's something different so he can't take you off.
simongren 5
OP, does he use money as a weapon a lot? There are certain types of abusers who do the "If you don't do what I say I will disinherit you!" as a ploy to control the people around them. They may not even have money, but just pretend they do. Best to give him your middle name and block him from ever contacting you again in any way . Make sure your finances aren't intertwined and go live your life without giving him space in your head.
brenton490 19
If I were you I'd call that no father of mine just another person.