Jes
Today, my father called me to ask what my middle name is. He apparently needed to know it to remove me out from his will. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
ItGirl
Eskilstuna, Sweden
Today, my dad got so drunk that he forgot my name. He started calling me "It". FML
Jololol
United States
Today, I found out I was named after the woman my dad used to stalk when he was in high school. FML
Anonymous
Johannesburg, South Africa
Today, my estranged father, with whom I haven't spoken in years, called me and demanded to know where his Father's Day gift was. FML
Anonymous
Minneapolis, United States
Unreasonable
Today, my father-in-law decided to disown myself and his son, because my husband decided to hyphenate his last name. FML
lawoman27
United States
Today, I found out I was named after the woman my dad was having an affair on my mom with. FML
forgottendaughter
South Africa
Today, my father asked me to never contact him again. The reason? His "new" family doesn't know I exist and explaining that he has a 28 year-old daughter to his wife and his other children would be "awkward". I have siblings that I will never meet. FML
Johndoe
Good boy
Today, my dad called my by the family dog's name, and stared at me blankly as if struggling to remember my name when I was annoyed. FML
Anonymous
Today, my father told me that it wasn't that I was written out of his will, it's that he never thought to include me in the first place. FML
rejectedson
This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff
United States
Nice to know
Today, my father got married. He left me a voicemail to tell me all about it. FML
Florida
United States
Today, my husband informed me that his father adopted a dog. I replied "Cool," he then said, "She happens to have your name." I think my father in law is trying to send me a message. FML
Top comments
Miss_Whipped 43
OP, If I were in your shoes and that were my father, I'd tell him to take his will and shove it where the sun don't shine. Any father that can't remember his own daughter's middle name - and certainly only asks for it for a selfish reason - doesn't deserve her time anyway. Maybe I'm being harsh but I certainly don't think he's the kind of father I'd want in my life.
JBChristian 47
Killing anybody isn't particularly something to joke about, but we do it everyday. Jokes usually are about things that shan't be joked about, that's what makes them funny; because it's just a joke.
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Comments (41)
nattnatt73 31
Wow that sucks, I'm sorry op.
Lozfan15 9
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Oh man, that sucks. Just tell him if he doesn't put you back on the will, you'll make his funeral come sooner. ;)
CMYKorBust 7
Not sure why this was upvoted. That's not particularly funny if that was your intention and killing family members is not really something to joke about.
JBChristian 47
Killing anybody isn't particularly something to joke about, but we do it everyday. Jokes usually are about things that shan't be joked about, that's what makes them funny; because it's just a joke.
missyfiona89 28
if you're kidding about killing someone and think that it's alright (I hope you're kidding anyway), I'm going to assume that you're a Trump fan.
Big_D_Real 12
Says someone who is probably a Hillary fan. How do you feel knowing you support someone that actually has people killed regularly?
AmericanBadAss 21
Remind him that it will be YOUR decision as to which nursing home he gets put in later in life - the good, but very expensive, privately run luxury home where all of the attendants really do care for each patient, or the cheap, State run home where the few attendants enjoy using the patients for Joseph Mengele-type experiments. If you put the fear of God in them now, you can pretty much dictate your terms and never have to utter another threat the rest of your life. Easy street. :-)
Dale_shackleford 13
If she is getting removed from his will I doubt she will have a lot of control over him if he deteriorates to the point where he has to go to a nursing home.
arano 29
What an ass. Good thing you don't need his shit when he kicks the bucket. You're awesome, OP.
Dale_shackleford 13
He's probably a shitty dad if he can't remember his own kids last name, but it's possible that there is more to the story. It's possible op really sucks and is getting removed from his will for a valid reason.
arano 29
Just throwing positivity their way. My dad was removed from my grandpa's will for no reason. Some people are just assholes.
siggy_mcsigx 22
My half brother was removed from the will/estate of the other family when our dad and his mom divorced. They were very wealthy as well.
MurkwoodForest 24
I'm sure there was some reason, your grandpa didn't just wake up one morning and spontaneously decide to write him out.
Miss_Whipped 43
OP, If I were in your shoes and that were my father, I'd tell him to take his will and shove it where the sun don't shine. Any father that can't remember his own daughter's middle name - and certainly only asks for it for a selfish reason - doesn't deserve her time anyway. Maybe I'm being harsh but I certainly don't think he's the kind of father I'd want in my life.
Shade1982 21
Just playing devil's advocate here, but we really don't have a lot of info to judge this story on. All we have is op's side of the story in one line. There is most likely much more to the story...
maybeadream 9
He doesn't remember his own child's middle name..... Enough said!!
danandphil 12
Jesus Christ what a dick
NagolNodsae 5
no it's Jesus Christ it's Jason Borne
Lizzy500 16
Sounds like bullshit to me. Keep an eye on your credit to make sure he isn't opening accounts in your name. He doesn't need that info to edit his will.
Shade1982 21
Actually, he does. Names in wills need to be precise, or you run the risk of your will not being honored because of a technicality.
Lizzy500 16
If she's already named in the will, he has her name. Id be more inclined to believe him if he said he needed it to add her to his will.
FMLUser404 4
The question we should be asking is. Was op a dick to their father? (or did they leach off them etc). If op was a model child then FYL, but you might have deserved it without knowing more info.
Danne696 14
Tbh, if OP's father didn't want to put her in his will he doesn't have to. Like yea, sucks to be OP, but it is his money/house/whatever and he can do what he wants with it.
Aang558811 9
don't tell him your middle name
datwall 16
Were you willing to tell him?