Today, my family went and visited my nan. She ushered me in close and asked, "When are you going to knock it off with all this emo cockshite?" FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I took my grandma to the hospital to visit her estranged husband who she hasn't seen in years. After a thoroughly disasterous visit, we're waiting in the carpark and my gran strokes my face and tells me I have a lot of facial hair. I thought she was going to thank me. And I'm a girl. FML
Today, I was finally able to see my gran for the first time since lockdown. She told me off for not visiting sooner. FML
Today, I was complaining to my Nana about why I can’t get a date. She proceeded to point out my appearance, lack of brains, abrasive personality, poor clothing choices, tacky tattoos, and so on. Thanks Nana. FML
Today, I took my kids to visit their grandma. At one point while playing, my youngest said "Shit!", so I admonished her. My mom snorted and told me to "stop being such a little bitch", because it will make my kids into "lame prisses like their mother." FML
Today, I went to visit my senile grandma, since she's ill and nobody else in the family visits her. I ended up having to sit through a long rant about the Illuminati, black people, and how we'd have a cure for the common cold already if it weren't for "those god damned foreigners". FML
Today, I decided to spend a few days at my grandma's house, to help her clean the place up a bit. So far, she's given me a "no masturbating under my roof" talk, used multiple racist slurs, and yelled "QUIET DOWN!" when I so much as sneezed in the next room. FML
Today, my daughter turned Emo. FML
Today, I visited my in-laws, whom I thought I was on great terms with. I soon learned that wasn't the case when my mother-in-law yelled at me about how I've been abusing her for years. Ten minutes later, she hugged me and asked me for grandkids. FML
Today, I was drunk at my nan's birthday party. My boyfriend texted me asking if I could go out, to which I replied "No, I'm at my nan's house." He then dumped me, calling me a "cheating whore." I was confused, until I realised I'd misspelt nan and said, "No, I'm at my man's house." FML
Today, being the nice grandchild that I am, I went to visit my grandmother. She didn't recognise who I was. I thought she was joking. She later called the police as, "Some weirdo had walked into her house." I'm that weirdo; she wasn't joking. FML
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Top comments
carameldrizzle 0
why do people think it's cute to act like this
whiteboy7thst 2
Are you cockshite?
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Comments (395)
LawKirraki 0
K
FutureSurgeon 16
You have the right to dress however you want. Ignore people who tell you differently.
chase2208 10
Lol ya better knock it off
Sciath13 14
Hey, dude, cudos to your gran, she sounds pretty cool. I honestly can't think of any other old people who actually know the word "emo" even exists. And she just gave me my new favourite cuss word... Cockshite. Yip, it's a keeper XD