Today, my family came to see me in my first acting role in Romeo and Juliet. It all went reasonably well for the first half hour or so, after which my seemingly shitfaced aunt started heckling and saying, "That's what she said" after every line, before eventually being thrown out by security. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, we had to do a scene from Romeo and Juliet. I was Romeo, and this really pretty girl was Juliet. When she found out she was with me, I heard her say "FML." FML
Today, I auditioned for my school's production of Romeo and Juliet. When they announced that I got the part as Juliet, all the guys auditioning for Romeo suddenly disappeared. FML
Today, I co-starred in a production of Hamlet. Halfway through play, the actor playing Hamlet forgot his lines, threw a raging temper tantrum, screaming about how much he hated the play and how he wanted to go home in front of hundreds of audience members. FML
Today, I had a show with my drama group. My mom isn't a good drunk, she decided to scream along to every song and pass out halfway through. She was in the front row. FML
Today, I was in a play and had a battle scene. I got a little too into it and wound up twisting my ankle. The audience was treated to me screaming like a little girl before face-planting the stage a moment later. FML
Today, I had my first day in an acting class. Our assignment was to perform a dramatic monologue. I got super into it, threw myself into character, and dramatically fell to my knees to deliver a line. Unfortunately, my knees slipped, and I faceplanted into the floor in front of the entire class. FML
Today, I had a theatre performance. I had to put on a lot of makeup for the role, and one of the guys said I looked nice. I smiled and said thanks. Seconds later, I'd been sucker-punched by his girlfriend for "flirting" with her man. FML
Today, it was opening night for the play where I was, for the first time ever, one of the leads. I went on stage with a loud and energetic entrance. I came in two scenes early. FML
Today, I auditioned for a part in a play. I've been practicing for months, and was very excited. After I'd finished singing, the director whispered something to the other judges, and they all laughed. Hard. So much for the lead role. FML
Today, at my job as a movie theater attendant, my boss finally eased up and let me sit in on one of the movies. One woman kept laughing out loud every other line. After ten minutes of her braying like a dying horse, I got up and had her ejected from the theater. I'm a terrible person. FML
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Top comments
Freeze_fml 17
Dirty minds make the world go 'round.
FYLDeep 26
I can picture it now... *cut to the stage* "True; and therefore women, being the weaker vessels, are ever thrust to the wall: therefore I will push Montague's men from the wall, and thrust his maids to the wall." "That's what she said!!"
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Comments (78)
Freeze_fml 17
Dirty minds make the world go 'round.
Keyman1212 14
Please enlighten me how dirty minds make the world go 'round. I thought that was caused by the earth orbiting the sun?
Shrike 24
shut the **** up, keyman. you're about as funny as a spastic colon
margie2194 12
Why don't I have family members like this? It would make or superb family dinners.
Freeze_fml 17
The world goes 'round by the angular momentum of the Earth, smart ass.
EvilPotato 15
OP's aunt is awesome.
KiddNYC1O 22
Just for devil's advocate; what makes it go 'round is lunar and solar gravity.
Mean_Mr_Mustard 9
12-omg. Your comment made me want to blow a hole in my head. In short, stfu.
Keyman1212 14
16- Spastic colon's are hilarious as ****. 21- Feel free to to explain your idea of angular momentum to me, you can even use the Internet for all I care. I'd love to hear how simplistic and inane your views on quantum mechanics are.
Mean_Mr_Mustard 9
14- you seriously made me want to blow a hole in my head do us all a favor and stfu. Go drink alone in your corner and yell at a crossword puzzle for not knowing the right question for your answer. Go step on a Lego, and when you sneeze I hope you pee a little.
THE_A_TEEN 28
#14 you ruined the joke. Way to go >:|
StoryOfTheYear 15
Do I make you horny baby?
Freeze_fml 17
You make me nauseous.
EvilCupcake8361 9
WTF??
StoryOfTheYear 15
Just about anything will make you nauseous when you're spinning at 600,000 miles an hour.
ImFrackinBored 13
I want to meet your aunt.
ikickgingers 15
*dickrides thread*
StoryOfTheYear 15
Yayy
TheLetterZero 7
I'd say it's a good thing she was thrown out. Those type of people are annoying as heck.
gamercanadian 11
That's what she said Ahaha jk ;)
BreyBBY 0
*sighs*
emerluvsu 6
Ouch, fyl. I'm a theatrical performer and have been for 5 years, and nothing is worse than a heckler in the crowds.
ShroomsOnAcid 17
Worse than a mountain lion in the crowd?
ItsTheKing 10
Worse then DocBastard in the crowd?
WTSchool 0
Worse than no crowd at all?
HeavyScout 0
Worse than a coke bottle shoved up you're ass?
emerluvsu 6
I stand corrected, but DocBastard and Boners would both have to be there. Sitting next to each other. I shudder at the very thought.
emerluvsu 6
Oh, and you too perdix.
KiddNYC1O 22
A stickler for a tickler?
THE_A_TEEN 28
#28 Dont forget KaySL
marisol18 0
That's what she said lol j/k
nitram0606 0
What the hell...
BellaBelle_fml 23
SECURITY!
BauerMegan 31
Ha I lol'ed!
ih82bl8 2
I'm sorry, how old Ur your aunt? "stop seriously, how old are you?" "...that's what she said"
ShroomsOnAcid 17
What now?
nitram0606 0
What the ****?
PeteyPablo12308 20
Huh? Comment #5, you made absolutely NO sense... My brain is now damaged from trying to read your comment.
rarememory 7
Should've stopped the show and said "SECURITY please escort that drunk lady pit of here"
nitram0606 0
What the hell is with the spelling on the last several posts. Holy Shit!
WTSchool 0
This is when you bite your thumb at her, point, and laugh as she's thrown out. Then carry on as if nothing happened.
zacharytk72 5
I love your aunt :)
Kendall_Cali97 8
That's what she said;) jk
FYLDeep 26
I can picture it now... *cut to the stage* "True; and therefore women, being the weaker vessels, are ever thrust to the wall: therefore I will push Montague's men from the wall, and thrust his maids to the wall." "That's what she said!!"
leadsails320 0
sounds like my aunt. cool as ****.
leadman1989 16
Lead sails don't sound very efficient at all. >:0
nitram0606 0
Your aunt and the OP's aunt are BOTH dumb bitches apparently....that's the most irritating shit when people screw off like that during a performance of any kind.