Today, I had a theatre performance. I had to put on a lot of makeup for the role, and one of the guys said I looked nice. I smiled and said thanks. Seconds later, I'd been sucker-punched by his girlfriend for "flirting" with her man. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was sword fighting in a play when I accidentally hit the other person in the head. He called me a bitch and stormed off stage, leaving me alone with an audience of 50. FML
Today, I went to go see my boyfriend of over two years in a play. I knew that he'd be kissing his female opposite at the end of the show, and I was okay with that. I snuck into his dressing room at intermission to find him "rehearsing" with her half-naked. FML
Today, while I was standing in line at the store, some guy insulted the girl in front of me as he walked past. She turned around and socked me in the face. FML
Today, I decided to not wear makeup for the first time. My boyfriend asked me if I got punched in the face. FML
Today, I was out when a guy walking with his girlfriend eyed me up. I made a shocked face at him and kept walking. The next thing I knew, his girlfriend was beating the shit out of me claiming that I was "the other woman." I'd never seen the guy before in my life. FML
Today, I got punched in the face, had hair ripped out of my skull and broke a tooth on the pavement when I fell. Some guy mistook me for someone else. FML
Today, I was at the movies with my boyfriend, when I had to go pee. Halfway down the aisle, I tripped, screamed, and fell face-first into some guy. My boyfriend is now accusing me of cheating and "flirting" with every man I see. FML
Today, I was walking down the street to go to the movies, when I got punched in the back of the head. When I turned around, a stranger said, "HAHA! It's punch a random person day!" When I asked him why he chose me, he replied "You're ugly." FML
Today, I went to the movies with my girlfriend. As I started putting my arm around her, I hit her in the face. FML
Today, I dropped in on my wife at her part time waitressing job. As I was leaving, I gave her tushie a playful squeeze. I was then tackled by some acne-ridden teenage blockhead trying to impress the hot waitress by beating up the guy groping her. FML
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Top comments
nesteremily 31
Punch her back, explain later.
moophasa 19
Seriously? What a bitch
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Comments (79)
nesteremily 31
Punch her back, explain later.
Llama_Man2000 26
2 wrongs don't necessarily make a right, even if the other person deserves it.
fuckedPriceless 17
**** that, if some random person punches me I'll punch back. doesn't matter if it's right, wrong, misunderstanding, etc.
Llama_Man2000 26
Fair enough.
cameron6731 13
Assualt much
psychopolarbear 28
She hit you first, it's self defense. She deserves it for going nuts like that.
WoW_Nerd 12
Well obviously accepting a complement if flirting. duh!
moophasa 19
Seriously? What a bitch
mukduk 21
Wow, someone is insecure. Hopefully the boy responded maturely and did something about his lunatic girlfriend.
HarshD9619 34
I'm pretty sure he would be sucker-punched after that too
dudeofawe 15
Had to read that in Dwight's voice.
Andrewski12 18
I've heard us men are the root of all evil. he planned that.
drayloon 50
you've spent too much time on tumblr
Roxas_hearts 27
Why is this guy getting thumbs down?
jerryj 27
Because he's wrong.
sonofmontreal 1
I don't understand why some comments get a shit ton of thumbs down when they are obviously sarcastic jokes. People are so easily offended on this social media
MisterEx 28
What do you mean easily offended? You'll hear from my lawyer soon, 59!!
serslybro 20
Cause it's all your fault... Stupid jealous girls!
marigoldcobain 21
That's not even... what?
marigoldcobain 21
Sorry. I saw I was kind of early and I couldn't think of anything good so I just expressed my utter confusion as to why the **** she would do that.
christmaswizard 9
Hopefully it didn't ruin your performance!
nityasomaiya 46
Oh I'm pretty sure it messed up her makeup tho. And probably added another shade of blue or bright red to it.
PickledSweets 22
Sometimes I'm ashamed to be a girl. Things like this are the reason why.
Ardeku 15
I feel the same way but about being a male.
jerryj 27
Why don't you both swap? :)
fantasyworld 39
I feel bad for him, having to deal with someone as crazy as her.
HPCullen251 21
Don't feel too bad; he's dumb enough to stay with her.