Today, my eight-year-old son thought that if he swallowed soap, his farts would smell like soap. The smell of vomit and diarrhea now permeating my house is proof of how wrong he was. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I finally found where the awful lingering stench in my house was coming from. My son thought it would be funny to piss in the baby's humidifier. He's 16. FML
Today, I walked in on my son's new habit. Sticking his finger up his ass, farting on it, and smelling it. Apparently, the scent is the purest then. FML
Today, I got to be an innocent victim caught in the middle of a farting war between my boyfriend and my 10-year-old son. I fear my sense of smell will never recover. FML
Today, I was holding my son and smelled poop so I checked his diaper, but there was nothing there. Then I realized it was my breath. FML
Today, I accidentally scared my one year-old son with my huge, smelly fart that was really loud. He now won't come near me without crying. FML
Today, I was joking around with my eight-year-old son. I told him to pull my finger. I farted, then laughed. He decided to try it on his mother. When she pulled his finger, he crapped his pants. He told her I taught him how to do it. FML
Today, my five-year-old son told me that I smell bad and asked me to take a shower so I wouldn't attract bugs into the house. I had just showered. FML
Today, I found out why my bathroom has been smelling so bad. My 10-year-old son has been peeing on the radiator, thinking it's fun to watch it steam and sizzle. FML
Today, I accused my son of faking being sick. He then blew chunks all over me. FML
Today, I thought it would be funny to fart next to my brother in the car. Apparently, his carsickness is exacerbated by strong smells. I now know what it feels like to have lap full of vomit. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
SandiRainbowFish 20
Oh, little kids....
j_cat187 20
Does he shit bubbles?
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (146)
KatieKupcake4195 9
This reminds me of the scene from The Little Rascals when Alfalfa accidentally drinks the soapy water. Then farts and a bubble comes out.
CinnamonRugby 5
Hes half right, he just ingested it through the wrong side
CinnamonRugby 5
Hes half right, he just ingested it through the wrong side
ManInTheMachine 20
What other side would he ingest it from? O.o
zombicidal 11
soap is not a suppository
yahoowizard 16
Either that or he tried the wrong brand. Experimentation, gogogo
CinnamonRugby 5
Hes half right, he just ingested it through the wrong side
Xythenol 6
I have an incredibly small penis.
NOPEdotXML 0
No, just no
pokefan813 16
I thought of that too but I don't know if that's jokeing material...
Xythenol 6
Thanks mods. I don't know how I managed to grow a penis, but...okay. This works for me.
HyperSquirrel 8
Ew! D= i'm sorry OP =/ at least he won't do it again?.. Hopefully?..
may651 14
Make him clean it and buy you candles for the smell. Sorry OP hope the son feels better.
Starv 6
He is 8 years old... Kids are kids... Too bad he didn't eat SOPA ;)
may651 14
Kids can learn to clean after themselves. Unless mommy well grow up and do everything for him/her.
MissNicky_fml 0
He is 8. He didnt know what he was doing. Dont punish him, hes sick!
mdtdnb 7
Seemed like a good idea at the time.
kimmi41509 10
He's only 8..of course he's going to be curious. Hopefully he learned his lesson from that.
UmBongos 3
Shitty situation?
ManInTheMachine 20
BURY HIM! I COMMAND ALL THEE FMLERS TO BURY THIS VILE PUN!! But honestly, why? You're just asking to get attacked.
Starv 6
More like a SOAPY situation...
pokefan813 16
Nope, shitty comment would be correct.