Today, my daughter's bed broke. Trying to see the damage, I lay down on her floor to get a closer look. I saw mountains of condom boxes under there. Now I know why the bed broke. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, after getting into bed, I found a used condom under my covers. I asked my roommate about it. She freely admitted that since my bed was comfier than hers, she had sex with her boyfriend on it. FML
Today, I was cleaning out from underneath my bed and found a used condom. I've never had sex in my own room. FML
Today, I cleaned up my brother's room, since he's moved out. Under the bed I found a Doritos bag full of used condoms. FML
Today, I went into my parents' room after spending pretty much all weekend in my their bed while they were out of town. I happened to look out the window, and on the windowsill was a puddle of cat vomit with a condom in it. FML
Today, I was packing when my parents told me to put my little sister's toothbrush in the top pocket of their suitcase. The pocket I opened had three unopened boxes of condoms in it. We're going to my gran's house, and I'm going to be sleeping on a mattress on the floor of their room. FML
Today, my parents were helping me move flats. The only box to spring open was the box containing condoms and copious amounts of napkins for clean up. They spilled all over the road as my dad was carrying it. My mum picked them up. FML
Today, my girlfriend's dad pulled out the chocolate-flavoured condom that went missing under the couch. FML
Today, I found out that the mysterious yellow mould that won't come off my apartment floor is in fact the remains of a condom my room-mate used when she was f*cking her boyfriend in my bed. Afterwards, she apparently threw it on the floor and let it lie there. For three weeks. FML
Today, in a rush to get my clothes back on at my girlfriend's house at the sound of her parents opening the front door, I forgot to take the condom off. Her dad watched it fall out of my pant leg and onto the kitchen floor. FML
Today, my mom cleaned up my room. I had a drawer filled with condoms, 2 vibrators, and a bondage kit. She organized the condoms and vibrators in a shoe box. FML
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Top comments
barnmaster98 5
Atleast she's being safe
yumyumpoptart 16
better to see a mountain of condom boxes rather than a grandchild 9 months down the road.
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Comments (298)
unachicahermosa 5
Better a Box of Condoms than a Bag of Diapers!
d10cat 0
You people are something else. If your kid lives in your house everything is your business as the parent
meteor_stream 9
Other people's sex lives aren't. Get over it.
kandi_kid69 15
OP, better to see condoms than pregnancy tests and/or diapers for the future. Be happy she's trying to be safe. But if she's young sit down and have a talk with her.
chokefrantic 9
Wow, your daughter should be a little bit smarter.
babyshaft408 8
Getten stuffed
ajpopoca88 3
they must have been practicing the olympic thrust. how do you break a bed?
thatoneguy79 10
It sounds as though you have a few options here. 1) get a new bed without a frame, so she has to dispose of the empty boxes properly, and store the unused ones somewhere else. 2) get a new bed with the loudest box spring you can find. Works like Rochard Simmons posters to discourage extraneous activities. 3) don't get her a new bed; make her buy a new one, and an apartment to keep it in. 4) replace the boxes of condoms with boxes of pregnancy tests to freak her out. 5) if unused condoms, leave a note letting her know you 'borrowed' a box because you were out. Whatever you do, do NOT confront her directly or have a meaningful discussion regarding her sexual activities, especially if she has not graduated high school yet. Chances are she will not pay attention while she is texting on her phone to her friends anyway.
drakej 0
Can i meet your daughter? Lol jk. Its awesome that she knows how to be safe
1710_fml 0
Perv
j_cat187 20
Ol' Dirty Bastard: Hoooooooeee!!
bchelle11 0
Lol...this FML reminds me fondly of myself...