Today, my daughter finally gave birth to twin boys. She informed me that she named them Peregrin Took and Meriadoc Brandybuck. My grandsons are named after Hobbits. FML
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Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I discovered that my wife named our kids after her former lovers. We have two sons and a daughter. FML
Today, I learned that I'm expecting twins. A boy and a girl. My husband, upon finding out about this, immediately suggested that we give them Star Wars names. But not Luke and Leia. Oh no. He wants to name them Darth and Vayda. And he is absolutely serious about this. FML
Today, my father-in-law announced the name of his new son, my husband's half-brother. The first name and last name is the same as our son, who I gave birth to 4 months ago. FML
Today, I heard my daughter-in-law refer to her twin daughters, my precious twin grandbabies, as “the good one” and “the shit stain”. FML
Today, after my wife gave birth to another of our daughters, she announced that this was the last one. When I reminded her I still needed a son to carry on my name, she replied, "Well, you've got four girls. You want a boy? Birth him yourself!" FML
Today, I went to my first ultrasound appointment. The daughter I was hoping for is actually going to be boy triplets. FML
Today, I came home to my wife crying. She had mixed up our newborn twin girls and couldn't tell which was which. I looked at the girls. Neither could I. FML
Today, I found out that my 6-year-old son was named after my wife's "Favorite Uncle" because he might also be the father. FML
Today, I announced my fourth pregnancy, this time with twins. I heard my mother mutter, “Finally two kids from the same dad.” FML
Today, my partner convinced both of our little brothers that we are naming our son Obi-Wan. They now won't stop rubbing my belly and quoting Star Wars. This is going to be one long Christmas. FML
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Top comments
Enslaved 38
Those names have a nice Ring to them.
mfjkr 10
You can drink your fancy ales you can drink em by the flagon but the only brew for the brave and true... comes from the green dragon.
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Comments (278)
newbiehere99 6
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
You should be proud :)
JocelynKaulitz 28
Well hey, it's unique. There won't be anyone else with that name when they'll go to school or work.
tiggerbaxon 2
That's AWESOME!
fml121785 14
I feel bad for them when they learn to spell/write their names in school! You know the teacher always made you write out your full name on every paper in K-3rd grade to practice! :(
fml121785 14
Also feel worse for the second one. His nick name will sound like "Maria". :(
bladedrose 3
The short version is Mary....
fsomelife 26
#40 - "Merry." Read the books, don't just watch the movies.
fml121785 14
Sorry, I haven't read or watched them, I was just going by the spelling, but Mary is just as bad as Maria. Poor boys, parents just set them up for years of torment & bullying in school.
thethingy 6
There gonna cop so much shit about their names when they go to school
WritingWrongs 8
How could they be embarrassed when other kids are named things like stashon, letisha or cutie?
JennaNGood 21
Agreed, how could they possibly be embarrassed? As long as their peers have a proper childhood (eg. Growing up with LOTR) then they should be fine! Plus I know a bunch of kids with odd names and it doesn't really matter past third grade. Unless your name is Venus and you're ugly. Im sorry, but your parents were setting you up for failure there
AlexxIV 3
Only this that could have been cooler, is if she'd had one of each and called then Luke and Leia
namyo 13
117 apart from the fact they're both boys
ALlamaOnFire 20
36/40 Merry and Pippin:) not Mary...
letmehavemytea 21
That is adorable!! OP really should be proud :)
shaagy2760 13
This isn't am fyl this is a **** your grandsons life's
patriotsfan12 4
I would have named them gimli and gandalf
MrCatman1125 2
I would rather be named Peregrin or Meriadoc than a common name like Tyler, Kyle, Alex, Etc.
Enslaved 38
Those names have a nice Ring to them.
OnlyAvailableID 28
Bring them to Scandinavia. That way she can take the Hobbits to Isengard.
mfischer 17
They might have some trouble being Shired by most employers with names like that though. They'll have to go There and Back Again with birth certificates to prove that they're legitimate. It's hard enough to get your foot in the Mordor and find wOrc as it is.
Schizomaniac 24
One does simply get a foot into Mordor.
mfischer 17
Fun fact: the snapshot of Boromir that you thought of upon reading the above comment is actually from a completely different line of dialogue.
sniken 14
They'll have to get used to ale from birth. You simply do not wear such name without ale in hand!
DaniPandi 22
Maybe you should take them to Isengard.
sonicgreg 12
34 Fact: he mixed the original line with the comment he was replying to.
MrPlopper 9
HODOR!
PinkElephants713 6
I think this just made my life.....
eerin444 5
I see what you did there
SoylentCandycorn 10
"No one's going to tease them or make jokes about their names! Stop being such a negative nancy!" Half the comments are jokes about their names. Oh, FML.
robbilee 14
You must be so proud. It could have been worse.
fuzz97 23
Not much worse.
Docbee 11
It could always be a lot worse! Like Anita Wang Mistake Disappointment Failure And many more cheerful names!
unicornpower56 7
Better then Blue Ivy. Named after a ******* color.
twinkiefeets 17
I rather be named after a color than a hobbit.
Saikon1357 25
How about hashtag?
rattusrattus 19
"Reneesme". Or however you spell it. I mean, I'm not a fan of Tolkien but he created beloved stories and created or cemented most of the conventions of the High Fantasy genre. Peregrin can also stand as a name on its own - an unusual one, but naming people after birds of prey is not stunningly bizarre. Unlike "Reneesme" where stunningly bizarre is just the start of the problems.
SaintPeasy 3
How about "Walker" and "Texas Ranger"?
bizarre_ftw 22
Hunter Why the hell name your son Hunter?!
bizarre_ftw 22
Also: Twin girls — Ima and Ura Pigg Parents didn't realise until they got the birth certificate — Crystal Chandra Leer
BlueFlatts 20
I know 2 Hunters, mind you that definitely would'd even be a consideration of mine.
sens3sfailing 25
I think hunter is an awesome name. It's after a profession where you stalk and kill prey! (When I hear hunter I think of the Native American hunters)
ColdplaySucks 18
Blue Ivy backwards is Yvi Eulb, Lucifer's (the Devil) daughter's name. There's one explanation.
mfjkr 10
You can drink your fancy ales you can drink em by the flagon but the only brew for the brave and true... comes from the green dragon.
tjohnson19 6
YES! So much win :)
Scribe_fml 8
Hark to the sound of the pouring rain...
tsent8 15
Shit hold up I'm gonna go grab my mug you better be ready to sing that again.
Starchild2229 12
Gimli passed out after a drinking battle with Legolas even proves this message *thumbs up*
Harpy20 24
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
You don't have midgets or dwarves in the family do you?? **** their lives, nonetheless. Blame the heavy painkillers?
bladedrose 3
Erm...what?
onlychildFTW 34
This comment confuses me. Anyone else?
MEM0817 18
I think number 5 is a bit more confused than the rest of us.
heyguysitsjosh 8
Every time I read one of your comments, I die a little.
astralvagan 20
I think 5 might be the one blaming the heavy painkillers.
Harpy20 24
I guess no one got the reference. Oh well.
Axipiter 24
"Today, I made a comment I thought everyone would find clever. Nobody did. FML."
iLuvsIt 10
Oh god. Because they were named after hobbits. You know - little people? It wasn't funny but it made sense.
iwadasn 33
That's awesome! But if it really bothers you that much (and it shouldn't), they'll most likely wind up going by nicknames anyway. Perry's a perfectly normal name, after all.
mfischer 17
Pippin. Pippin is the proper nickname for someone named Peregrin Took.
Bunaf 4
Especially if he's a fool of a Took.
MiloBear 11
One of my lecturers at university is named Peregrine but he goes by Perry. I think Pip or Pippin would be cute for a kid but once he reaches adulthood I think he would take the more recognised version, "Perry".
JennaNGood 21
If we're going by more "recognized" versions, it would still be Pippin... Ever heard of a little book called Lord of the Rings?
Potato_Pi 7
I prefer Glorfindel, it's such a cool name
TheDrifter 24
Why couldn't she pick dwarves? They at least have easy to pronounce names.
mfischer 17
It would have made more sense to name them after one of the Dwarven twin pairs from the Hobbit anyways. I think Glenn and Oin have a nice Ring to them, don't you?
perdix 31
#8. I agree! Grumpy and Dopey would be much cooler. I think Doc would agree with that, too.
Sandman366 6
Oh yes. Name one after GI Li's grandfather, Groin.
stephhrunsaway 21
She should have picked Elvish names. They're so pretty!
cr3ativity 15
That's a bit too obsessed in my opinion. But hey, they might find 11 other friends and they will embark thought the adventure called life. :)
cr3ativity 15
7* other friends.
Enslaved 38
Somehow your comments made me wonder, where have all the 7-elevens gone? I'm jonesing a cherry Slurpee!!
bizarre_ftw 22
Continuing the thread of random connections: George washington's code name was 7 11
BlueFlatts 20
Continuing the thread if random connections: My birthday is 7/11.
lsfactor 4
Further continuing the thread of random connections: 7/11 is the length of my junk/my shoe size. It just came to me, true story.
boofgall 16
I don't see that as awful. It's better than something typical like "Bill" or "Jeff".
Dracoboxer357 36
10- .....You know, I kinda agree with you. No offense to anyone named Bob, John, Steve or Bill, but I'd rather possess a hobbit name over one of those overly used, single syllable names. :P
fuzz97 23
Frankly, I'd rather be named Jeff than "that weird kid named after some kind of midget" which is inevitably what OP's grandkids will be referred to as.
Harpy20 24
15- I don't think too many people will know their whole name. They will most likely have nicknames so I doubt they'll get any weird labels.
mfischer 17
Of course they'll have nicknames. Pippin and Merry seem rather obvious choices to me. Your mind must be all in a Smaug not to have thought of that.
MisterMichael 9
My name is Bill...
Xephyr 1
Or Perry and Merry, then everyone will think they're named after Platypuses.
fsomelife 26
Better start living up to a Gandalf-like figure for them.
MatteKudasai 17
I hope OP has a good beard. We're assuming OP is male right?
FacePalmFail 9
I met Gandalf once - he brought his sword in too and said 'you shall not pass!' Best moment of my life. :-D (Just as a side note...)