Today, my dad yet again uttered the words "well, that escalated quickly," while watching the news. He uses this godforsaken meme multiple times a day. I lost my shit and told him to just shut up already. He raised an eyebrow and said, "well, that escalated quickly." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, a week after my dad discovered Family Guy and started mindlessly repeating catchphrases from it 24/7, I finally lost my temper and told him how incredibly annoying it was. He just paused, turned to look me in the eye, and said, "Shut up, Meg." FML
Today, my dad stopped me mid-sentence and said he wanted to punch me in the face and set me on fire for using the word "selfie". FML
Today, I was watching a movie with my family in which a character said "Fuck you, dad." My dad then slapped me over the head to get my attention and said, "Never talk to your father like that." Okay, dad. FML
Today, my boyfriend crossed a line with his bullshit "jokes". At dinner, he once again annoyed my dad by insisting that the "AR" in "AR-15" means "assault rifle". My dad is an NRA gun nut, so he finally blew up and told him that he was going to "AR his nuts if he didn't quit fucking with him." FML
Today, while I was pulling weeds, my dad thought it would be absolutely hilarious to yell "Hey, son!" then unload his gun at me when I turned around. After I'd screamed like a bitch and pissed myself, he broke down into hysterical laughter and said he'd loaded the gun with blanks. Fuck you, dad. FML
Today, my dad hit his mid-life crisis. When I came home and said hi, he told me to shut up, then went to the living room. He then lit up a cigarette and started muttering about having to put up with me, then went into a coughing fit, because he's never smoked before in his life. FML
Today, I joked with my dad, saying I'd gotten my boyfriend pregnant. In response, he slapped me, threw my phone across the room, smashed my laptop, and then took a moment for what I'd said to sink in. FML
Today, while mourning my friend's recent passing, my dad told me to shut the fuck up because "worse things are going on in the world". FML
Today, during a heated argument with my son, I lost my temper and called him a son of a bitch. He enthusiastically agreed. FML
Today, whenever my dad says something and I (genuinely) don't hear him, he repeats it in an extremely slow and condescending manner. My family says I should "get a sense of humor" because I'm rightfully pissed about this. FML
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Top comments
cherries62212 16
well... that escalated quickly...
JellyBalls 18
Respect your parents.
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Comments (185)
theberndttoast 8
u deserve it lol
lilhellian 27
You* And I don't blame op.. Like everything else it gets old fast..
samreimer 7
Man, if only there were some button you could press to express this thought without commenting...
abu4u 26
I agree with #1. The irony made me laugh too.
DudeEvil 22
However annoying, telling your parent to 'shut up'; where's the respect these days?
TwitchingNebula 17
OP needs to rub some dirt on it. If I talked to my parents that way when I was younger, I sure as hell wouldn't be here to write this. Get over it OP and learn some respect.
mattlw 25
At least #1 did not say... Well, that escalated quickly.....
miniski5 11
#25 thank you.... Some of my faith in humanity has been restored
Synistiel 14
49- By the way, that's old too.
AllThatHit 7
40 you're right 1 didn't say that, but 2 did
yoyoforpeace 14
Did you ever think that maybe...I don't know...things were escalating rather quickly? And he was just stating the obvious. Loosen up OP, he will find a new catch phrase soon.
CodeXana 9
25- I don't believe you should be require to respect someone just because you're related or they raised you. My boyfriend (just to use an example) lives with and was raised by his dad, who happens to be a drunk, neglectful, occasionally violent asshole. He doesn't deserve respect just because he gave half the genes of a person. We don't know that OP's parents deserve respect at all.
JBirdeye 14
Well that escalated slowly
cherries62212 16
well... that escalated quickly...
Hentai_fml 6
^^^ Well... That got up voted quickly.
SomeRandomGuy15 18
Well... That also got downvoted quickly
TheGodDamnJoker 9
30 - well that also got up .... *gets shot in the head
heygirlie777 21
Well...this is all getting VERY annoying quickly..
olpally 33
BACON!! I have spoken.
TourettesGuyFTW 26
The escalator is broken.
DaftDude 11
Try taking the stairs, but things won't escalate as quickly.
moonsalt 20
44- You made my day with that comment. I Lol'd so hard.
not_a_robot 15
Does nobody know that in the actual movie The Anchorman that he didn't even say "Well, that escalated quickly"? He says "BOY, that escalated quickly".
whiplash2289 19
nice try #20 & #24
maigan332 14
how original..
AndelleRae 9
Hahaha. My dad would do the same thing.
Trisha_aus 15
I think we're related.
sens3sfailing 25
Cuze nobody in the world has similar personalities right?
TourettesGuyFTW 26
Cuze?? As in, excuze me pleaze, I wanna cheezeburger?
sens3sfailing 25
Cuze I DO WHAT I WANT! *runs around throwing bad grammar everywhere*
DubstepMasta 18
Or maybe "Waddup cuze!" But even thats pushing it...
Rababco 29
@162 Loki, is that you?
BubbleGrunge 18
Did you down vote him?
lincolnick4 19
#84 I upvoted you for downvoting, if that makes you happy
DarkSeekerX94446 14
Haha your dad is epic! You don't get many people using memes irl :P
ElmoSaysSquishy 28
I was under the impression that was a good thing.
slappygecko 21
On the contrary.
sens3sfailing 25
When you say on the contrary, SPECIFY!? If I gave a shit about what you thought, I would be very annoyed right now trying to figure out wtf you meant.
Trix_Disorder 20
I believe he meant: "On the contrary, people hve started to use memes all of the time in real life." Chill dude.
briteone 2
Really, epic for repeating a phrase. He's epic as compared to what- a supernova or a tidal wave.
ChrisWaines 9
Your dad sounds awesome.
robertthorh 4
Your dad is cool
Tdrizzzzzly 19
6's dad is cool, 92?
JellyBalls 18
Respect your parents.
dogger2001 6
I saw what you said, then your profile pic and knew you are full of crap.
BlowinChronic 18
I have no idea why it's bothering me so much, but it's were*, not are.
carebear808 12
I totally feel for you. But you're dad is also pretty funny...
samreimer 7
Your*
carebear808 12
Autocorrect. Not my fault.
Shrike 24
Unless you're blind, it was your fault.
theawkwardlife 21
What does being blind have to do with it? Nice try 35.
Shrike 24
The fact that if you're actually looking at the screen, you can see the grammatical mistake and fix it before pressing "send". That really is blindingly obvious, if you'll excuse the pun.
carebear808 12
Oh I'm sorry if I have a life and don't have all the extra time to double check my work. This is an FML comment, not a college essay. Chill.
NewYorkMexPR 14
Lol epic dad
niezen 4
Your dad is friggen unreal