Today, my brother woke me up by trying to light my bed on fire. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, my idiot kid brother set my shirt on fire with a magnifying glass while I was taking a nap outside. FML
Today, I was sleeping like a baby on our living room couch. My older brother and his friends lit my slippers on fire. While I was wearing them. They even took a video. FML
Today, I woke up to the fire department at my house. Why? My brother called 911 thinking there was a fire after turning the heat on for the first time all winter. FML
Today, I found out my little sister is a pyromaniac. She set my bed on fire. FML
I'm awake
Today, my roommate thought it was a good idea to set my beard on fire to wake me up. FML
Today, I woke up because of a weird noise. Scared, I turned on my bedside lamp. I saw my older, 17-year-old brother peeing in my bedroom doorway. He was hoping I'd step in it in the morning. FML
Make it stop
Today, I was looking forward to my only day to sleep-in this month while I'm balancing school and work. I was rudely awakened at 6 am by my sister and her friend trying to make pancakes, burning them, and setting off the fire alarm in my house for half an hour. FML
Today, my friends thought it'd be funny to hold lighters under the smoke alarms while I was sleeping. FML
Release the tapes!
Today, for the second time in my life, I fell and got stuck between my wall and my bed wrapped in a blanket, mad. Instead of helping me, my brother just took videos. FML
Today, I found out my 10 year-old step-brother has an obsession with fire, after he burnt all the belongings in my room, including a £600 guitar. FML
Top comments
Awesomeaxel 24
Calm down. He was just performing the sacrificial ritual.
tantanpanda 26
He must really want you to be warm and toasty :)
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Comments (67)
LeavenSilva 27
Key word being "trying" I hope?
vb68_fml 28
This is not a FML, report him to the cops he's deranged and you're in danger. Not funny
vlalam 24
some brotherly love.. siblings, u can't get enough of them..
lesly30 14
Brothers are fun... lol
ThatNinjaBoy 9
I hope by saying "trying" that means he didn't finish lighting it on fire before you woke up...
factsarelife 7
Damn
exuberant_orange 17
I think this needs a follow up! XD
kewpiesuicide 29
That's more serious than most people even consider. Mattresses can catch fire very quickly and burn half of your house within minutes. I spent my summer cleaning up a fire damaged house that started with a cigarette on a mattress.
captain_crook 17
come on brother light my fire, try to set the bed on fire. :P -the doors
BlondePsycho 43
You must be flaming mad. Is your brother really hot headed or just a pyromaniac?