Today, my boyfriend of a month had to leave early. I asked him why and he replied that his brother was getting off the bus and he needed to feed him. I had never met his brother, and I said "He can't feed himself? What is he, retarded?" He is. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend came over to meet my family. When I told him I had an autistic brother before he came in, he immediately broke up with me because he claimed autism is another word for overprotective. I've been dating an idiot. FML
Today, I found out why my boyfriend won't come over anymore. He and my brother apparently had a "thing" before we started dating. FML
Today, I was spending time with my boyfriend for the first time in two weeks. I started tearing up and telling him that I feel like he never has time for me anymore. He responded with, "I'm hungry." FML
Today, I had to explain to my brother why he can't go on dates with my new boyfriend and me. FML
Today, after a week of not seeing each other, my boyfriend asked if he could come over and hang out. He only came because he ran out of food at his house. FML
Today, my boyfriend came over while I was babysitting my little brother. He wouldn't stay in bed, so my boyfriend told him,"If you don't stay in bed, the monster will eat you!" I now have to wash my brother's bedsheets, because he was too afraid to get up and go pee. FML
Today, I met my boyfriend's brother. When he saw me, he whispered into my boyfriend's ear, "So, this is your bitch eh? Nice!" FML
Today, my boyfriend finally met my brother. He arrested him for drunk driving. FML
Today, my boyfriend got mad at me because I refused to keep him company while he took a shit. FML
Today, my boyfriend was tidying up around the room. I asked him if he'd like me to help, to which he responded, "No, I don't need any help," then added, "Wish you weren't so lazy." FML
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Top comments
ghostgirll 0
thats why people shouldnt joke about mental retardation. YDI :)
teehee520 0
That's what you get for being snippy. YDI.
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Comments (151)
piggypaar 0
This is exactly why people (in general) NEED to stop using the word "retarded" so commonly while joking around.
scorpiogirl666 0
If I were your boyfriend, I would've dumped you. YDI. That was really insensitive of you.
cherrycream 0
watch your mouth.
kenzierosaline 0
GUTTED! xD aw shit happens doll.
OhMaiGosh 0
You're a dumbass.
cheech_fml 0
You shouldn't use "retarded" "retard" "gay" "dyke", any of those as a derrogitory term. millions of people are retarded millions of people are gay, i'm sure if they knew you were using those to insult other people they wouldn't appreciate it very much. Sorry but YDI.
Muse_89 0
I agree.
Jimboom 12
Step 1: remove shoe and socks Step 2: Open Mouth Step 3: Insert foot in mouth Perhaps you should try thinking before you speak in future. Instead of trying to be funny.. cause your not.
enlitenbank 0
Hope he breaks up with you when realizeds that youre a stuck up c*nt.
emma_josephine 0
just thought you should all know a 'retard' is the correct name for some one with mental dissablilties. i work with 'retards' daily and this is a perfectly P.C name for them.
SimpleSimon 0
"Retarded" and "Retardation" are valid words you'll often find in a medical context, but I have NEVER heard an individual referred to as "a retard" in a non-derogatory way. Maybe it's different where you live though.
UllNeverKnow 0
Weird... cause here it's politically incorrect... we call them developmentally delayed. And OP, YDI!!! Watch what you say, if you have the brains to even say that outloud, at least have the brains to think that it just MIGHT possibly be true.
callmecourtney 3
...Where are you? My step-mother works as SPED teacher and also has a special-needs child and if one of her co-workers or even her son's doctor called her son or one of her students a "retard" she would kill them. While "metal retardation" is a valid medical term, "retard?" Not so much.
warriorcatluvr 0
my mom is a sped teacher. and before I was born she worked with "retards". I would never say retard or sped. that's just mean
SimpleSimon 0
YDI, for being completely tactless. What other reasons would there be for this guy's brother to need feeding? Several, but none of them are good!
SimpleSimon 0
As I said, several, none of which are good!