Today, I had to admit that I'm polyamorous. Well, I'm in several relationships. Parasocial relationships. With YouTubers and Twitch streamers. I talk to them through the screen. I can't remember what it's like to have real-life friends. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my polyamorous friend has 3 boyfriends. My other polyamorous friend has 2 boyfriends and my other other polyamorous friend has a girlfriend and a boyfriend. I'm still single. FML
Today, I realized that I lie to my friends online and go "offline" for hours at a time so it appears that I have a life outside of the internet. FML
Today, I'm polyamorous. I dream of getting in those big, beautiful loving relationships you see in poly media, where everyone works to make it work. All I ever seem to meet are possessive freaks who want me all to themselves, or couples wanting a threesome. Do your reading! That's not how polyamory works! FML
Today, I found myself being jealous of the relationship between Ethan Klein and Trisha Paytas on Frenemies. I need a life. I need real friends. FML
Today, after watching my roommate and her boyfriend be all lovey dovey for months, I now have to watch two of our other friends flirting as well. I'm painfully single and have been struggling to change that for years. FML
Today, I'm in a polyamorous relationship. My husband and my boyfriend are both aware and are okay with it. Today they met. Not only are they okay with each other, they’ve hit it off. They've drafted a schedule of which days they want, meals, and chores for me on those days. FML
Today, I met up with a couple I know, who wanted to introduce me to someone. I thought they were setting me up with her, but no. They were coming out as polyamorous, and she was their new girlfriend. FML
Today, I realised something awful. I'm in two wonderful loving ethical non-monogamous relationships and I can and do occasionally enjoy a one-nighter or more outside of these. It hit me - I miss cheating. FML
Today, I'm in love with my best friend, while also being in love with my wife. I know he has feelings for me too. I wish my wife was poly too. FML
Today, I got so tired of my friends constantly pestering me about having a girlfriend that I downloaded Monika After Story. Now when they ask, I just say she's long-distance and values her privacy, so I can't show her to them. This is what my life has come to. Forever alone. FML
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Top comments
Jon Tessler 14
yeah um......you aren't polyamorous......
BMXDude22 12
All the people in the comments not getting the polyamory joke = priceless.
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Comments (9)
rainbowdonnareed 18
I'm confused
mando 10
most of us are 🤣
Jon Tessler 14
yeah um......you aren't polyamorous......
kfchicken 31
friendly tips, stop calling yourself poly, and stop referring to your entertainment habits as relationships. niether the people around or the streamers themselves like it. get in touch with your friends, play games with them even if it's been a while at least try to reach out. if that doesn't work find people who are looking for gaming buddies (I'm assuming you game since you watch twitch). once the lockdowns end it'll be the perfect time to join clubs, or community sports teams. people will be itching to get back out again use that to expand your social circle. this thought process can be self destructive so tread lightly
mando 10
why is this downvoted? It's an honest and good answer
bleachedraven 14
I don't think that's the definition of a poly relationship.
BMXDude22 12
No shit.
mando 10
Get a life
BMXDude22 12
All the people in the comments not getting the polyamory joke = priceless.
mando 10
your comment made me look up the definition of parasocial 🤣
ojoRojo 27
Do they know they’re in these supposed relationships with you?
mando 10
good question lol
Hempseed 27
That's not what polyamorous means.