Today, my boyfriend of 5 years spent a whole hour making me promise that if he ever died, I would never try to find someone else. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend brought up the time he said he'd love me until the day he died. He continued by saying, "So, let's just pretend I died today." FML
Today, my boyfriend and I exchanged promise rings. I promised that I would stay committed to him and that he was the only one for me. He promised that he would stop seeing other woman behind my back. He wasn't kidding. FML
Today, my boyfriend of three years asked me if I ever wanted to get married. I said yes. He said, 'But what happens if you never find a guy who likes you that much?' FML
Today, my boyfriend told me he wants to marry me and be the father of my children. Five minutes later, he told me he wants to experience death. FML
Today, my boyfriend of two years told his friend that he decided a long time ago that he would never be faithful to a woman. I was sitting next to him. FML
Today, I broke up with my boyfriend. He then told me that he will love me forever, wait for me and will follow me to the ends of the earth. Apparently, that means standing outside my door and calling my house phone every five minutes. It's been 3 hours straight now. FML
Today, my boyfriend thinks it’s going so well, we have marriage potential, so before we get any more serious he wanted a promise that I will never want children, and if I think there’s ever a chance I might, tell him soon because we’ll have to split up before we waste each other’s time. FML
Today, I found out that my boyfriend is only staying with me for the present I promised him for his birthday. FML
Today, my boyfriend proposed to me during a funeral. FML
Today, as my boyfriend was trying to convince me that he was not having an affair with another woman named Julie, he looked me in the eye and exclaimed, "I would never cheat on you, I love you more than anything, Julie". FML
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Top comments
DogmaT_fml 4
...like he would ever know.
hehe_oops 2
how nice of him :S atleast he didn't make you promise to commit suicide if he dies :D
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Comments (184)
Neall_fml 0
1st??
Cher_GaGa 0
amen!! he wants you to move on and be happy!
Eaglestrike117 29
Are you retarded? He DOESN"T want her to move on.
Jrook 0
49 don't be silly, clearly the op's bf wants her to be happy. you silly goose
hehe_oops 2
how nice of him :S atleast he didn't make you promise to commit suicide if he dies :D
jake_fml 0
1st replye!
justdancebbyx3 7
Dump him and see what happens
responses 0
just say yes, he'll never find out
vaebouria 0
yeah tell him to go **** himself
Extacy23 0
it really all depends on how she feels after his death..u kno?
metalfan333 0
not an fml! it would be an fhl if he died and you loved someone else.
lexie206 0
not really.. I know that if I ever died I would want my boyfriend to move on and be happy, even if that means him finding someone else.. her boyfried is only being selfish IMO
Reyo 2
To be fair, it is evolutionary for the male to not want the female to reproduce with any other males if the orignal male were to become...indesposed. All right, now let's hear it. I know a bunch of you are just dieing to say "dump his ass".
gisii1988 0
hahahahah exactly
Scoli85 0
@ #118 - What's "evolutionary" about it? In most mammals, males want to have as many partners as possible to foster as many offspring as possible. Not saying you're wrong, just would like to hear you're explanation.
thenewone 5
males tend to want to spread their genes, but they also tend to expect fidelity from females, to guarantee the offspring is really theirs. Females expect males to stick around and protect the offspring.
beachballa93 0
Do you dominate him in sex?
jwbbabe 9
op, I hope you lied.
adamo_erebus 26
#60 this comment made me laugh for a good few minutes
caancoha 0
He hopes you'll turn to necrophilia.
Averizzle 0
That is revolting
Flutist 3
Don't you love your mummy?
Reyo 2
#69's obviously never heard of a tantilizing little peice of literature called "Twilight".
MermaidSongXOXO 6
....You know there's a guy in Italy who preserved his dead wife, keeps her coffin in his basement, and has slept next to the coffin for almost 15 years? Necrophilia is f***ing disgusting... And #120 Vampires =/= corpses. Don't bring a book into this :L
dudeitsdanny 10
Vampires aren't alive. It's necrophilia. Did they hit a Twilight fan nerve?
pogostick_fml 2
I think he was referring to Twilight as being more revolting than the necrophilia comment, and not referring to vampires as corpses.
Flutist 3
Not if his wife is a vampire. Its like ******* a zombie that has some personality.
liveloveandownit 0
#124 Technically vampires are Undead so they are not alive but they are not corpses so it is not Necrophilia but it is still discusting and unnatural.
Hanban 0
That would be fulfilled if he ever died and came back to haunt you. Good times, good times.
thenewone 5
#138 Technically, vampires don't exist.
Flutist 3
Ah, yes they do. Not in the Cullen sort of way, it describes an illness people have where they are alergic to sunlight and often suffer from low iron, which causes them to ingest more meat, which is usually close to raw due to the need to blood (and what blood provides.).
Freeze_fml 17
Is that bad?
jeterman67 0
if he really loves u then he would want u to move on after he died dumb him now
Freeze_fml 17
Or maybe he doesn't want to feel like a disposable product that can easily be replaced after it's gone. I guess it's a matter of opinion, though. I couldn't see myself finding someone else if my wife died after I was married.
mfmylifesrsly 30
Freeze I agree with you. when me and this guy we're together he implied if we got married and he died he wouldn't want me to find someone else. Now, If he died, I wouldn't want him to marry someone else, but I would want him to be happy. and I couldn't have seen myself loving someone more than him, but I thought about what if we had kids? it would be soo hard to raise them and provide for them on my own. so, idk.
nyny26 0
I don't really understand why a reasonable person would think this is a nessisary talk to have... Naturally best case, everyone lives a long happy life with the right person... to make a convo like this and stress the point so strongly to me implies deeper issues on the part of the boyfriend needing to feel he is the one and only possibility for the OP to ever have in this world and in a world of billions it is just a lost cause convo.... questions with the "what if" factor seem like a waste... especially
texasjalapeno_fml 0
agreed
idkweird 0
That's morbid and disgusting, and he needs to grow up. How absolutely selfish to never want someone to be happy after you're gone.
wordgirl 0
My father-in-law made my mother-in-law promise that before he died, and he's really dead, and she's keeping the promise, and she's only in her sixties...FHL, because she could live another 20 or so years easily and be lonely/horny/bored the whole time, not to mention not living her life to the fullest and probably dying alone because he was so selfish.
Flutist 3
I think I don't want to hear about sixty year olds being horny. Thanks.
Fiskerz 0
There is really nothing wrong with that after they are married. Some people believe they will meet again and some people don't. Do what makes you happy. Single doesn't mean lonely to everyone. It's all how you look at it.
DogmaT_fml 4
...like he would ever know.
drunastunamazing 0
don't agree! don't agree! never promise! if he dies u have to move on and he is taking your happiness! f him!
tisiphone_fml 0
Yeah, there's something a bit wrong with the guy if he's that emotionally insecure...
o0XMzMayX0o 0
uh he probably dnt even trust u right now! u should b given more respect! why can't u b happy if he were to die?
justdancebbyx3 7
hi
Zigma_fml 0
**** off.
tman118 0
**** off
WhatANoob 0
oh hai der
shananigans 0
An hour? Wow you're patient. After ten minutes of that crap I'd just be like "Ok whatever you say babe." If he dies it's not like he'll know you didn't keep your promise. Unless you believe in the afterlife...
cookies61889 15
hell yea miami