Today, my boyfriend got mad at me for starting to give him oral sex because I wasn't paying attention to the Marvel movie he was showing me. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Moving
Today, my boyfriend and I were hooking up while watching a movie. Just as I was getting really into it, he told me to move my head. He couldn't see the television. FML
Are you kidding me?
Today, my boyfriend was complaining about how we never see the movies he wants to see. So I took him to the movies, and he picked which one. Then he fell asleep. FML
Snooze fest
Today, my boyfriend fell asleep while still giving me oral sex. FML
Today, while giving my boyfriend what I thought was an amazing blow job, he asked me if I'd seen Kung Fu Panda 3 yet. FML
Spoiled
Today, I finally got my boyfriend to watch one of my favorite TV shows. I was excitedly talking when he interrupted me and angrily said, "Can you stop with the fucking spoilers?" I then realized I'd spoiled half the show. He left to play video games. FML
Today, my boyfriend got mad at me because I refused to keep him company while he took a shit. FML
Bigmouth Strikes Again
Today, I told my boyfriend to stand up for himself more often. He now takes very hard stances on his desire for anal sex and his love for the Star Wars Disney+ series. I should’ve kept my big mouth shut. FML
The Force is weak with this one
Today, I sat through 9 gruelling hours of Star Wars with my boyfriend. I hate those movies with a passion and frankly would rather get a pap smear from Wolverine than watch them. Afterwards, he dumped me for yawning, saying that I didn’t take a “serious” interest in his favorite things. FML
Halitosis
Today, my boyfriend and I were making out when I asked him to go brush his teeth, since his breath stank. He went back to playing video games. FML
So generous
Today, I got into a fight with my boyfriend. The only thing he could think of to cheer me up was to give me "permission" to give him a blowjob. FML
Top comments
Soninuva 41
Oral sex is great and all, and I can see why you'd want your boyfriend to appreciate it when you give it to him, but bear in mind that not all guys are so shallow as to immediately drop everything at the opportunity of anything sexual. If he's trying to share his interests with you, allow him to. If it doesn't jive with yours, say so. In a non-sexual situation, it would be akin to him trying to converse with you about something he enjoys, and you start feeding you a food you know he likes mid-sentence. In both instances, in a different context they would be much appreciated, and always start by at least asking if he would like it, first.
kangx1 28
If it was during Deadpool I can't blame him. That shit was amazing.
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Comments (34)
DudeistPriest 2
Who wants to play a game of "swap the roles and see how the tone of the story changes"?
Manual_Manoosy 21
I thought women were supposed to be able to multi-task.
PhiMaxMa92 1
BJ or Movie? hmmm what a question. I think i would vote more for BJ because the reason =)
urafaguette 3
Methinks you probably need a new boyfriend. This one has issues!
HabitsRabbit1102 3
I agree your life sucks, if I was him. I would let you. except if it was a DC thing than I'd do what be did
WakaMiserably 10
Can't blame him tbh
DNiel Kwabena 8
Hahahahah