Today, my boyfriend and I were house sitting. We were a little on edge because we'd heard noises. We were starting to get intimate, and suddenly the house alarm started going off. We locked ourselves in the room, called the police, and they told us that we were the ones who'd set it off. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my building's fire alarm went off. Unfortunately, this coincided with sexy time, and the loud alarm made me jumpy, making it extremely difficult to untie my naked boyfriend. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were getting it on, and listening to loud music when she suddenly looked worried and asked if I heard something. I said no and continued. Moments later, three firemen opened the bedroom door and told us to get dressed and go outside because the building was on fire. FML
Today, my boyfriend thought it would be romantic to throw pebbles at my bedroom window in the middle of the night. It triggered the burglar alarm, which woke up everyone in the house. If my parents didn't know I had a boyfriend before, they certainly do now. FML
Today, I snuck into my boyfriend's house because I knew his parents wouldn't be there. Later, I woke up in a hospital bed because his sister thought I was a burglar and tased me. FML
Today, I was woken up by the sound of someone in my room. I started freaking out, thinking someone had broken in, so I kicked them, only to realise it was my boyfriend coming back from the toilet. I'd forgotten he was staying over. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having a make-out session in the backseat of his car, when we heard a voice coming from his pants. Who did he pocket dial? My house. At midnight, when I was supposed to be home. FML
Today, my roommate came home and instantly began raging, cursing, and threatening to kill me. While I was cowering in my bedroom, the police had to settle the situation. All I'd done was rearrange some furniture. FML
Today, I called the police because I thought a burglar had broken into our house. I found out the strange noise was just my dog fucking about, so I smashed a small window and kicked down a door so I wouldn't be embarrassed. FML
Today, I woke up to a stranger in my bed. Just as my parents responded to my screaming, I remembered that I'd helped my boyfriend sneak in through my window last night. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I decided to sneak into the shower at her house while her parents went out to eat and a movie. Half way through our shower we heard a knocking at the door, it was her mom. We had left all of our clothes downstairs. Safe to say I won't be allowed there any more. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
almost_there44 26
I hope this is not the case and hopefully I'm wrong. But, were you and your partner house sitting and about to have sex? That's just nasty and disrespectful to the people's house y'all were watching.
potatocouch 16
Both of you were so turned on that you turned the house alarm on.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (17)
potatocouch 16
Both of you were so turned on that you turned the house alarm on.
almost_there44 26
I hope this is not the case and hopefully I'm wrong. But, were you and your partner house sitting and about to have sex? That's just nasty and disrespectful to the people's house y'all were watching.
domolovesyoshi 33
Yep totally dosrespectful
piker117 11
If the owner hired a couple to house sit for more than a few nights they probably expected it.
ChristinePi 36
If they're adults and they're house sitting for the parents, I'm sure it's more common than you think. If it's a stranger's house then I agree with you.
almost_there44 26
I feel like it wasn't their parents. If it was, they most likely would have known about the alarm and known how to disarm it.
cootiequeen4444 11
who would let a stranger house sit for them? That doesn't sound very smart.
KillerChipmunk 15
Just because they don't know about the alarm doesn't mean they're strangers to to home owner. I've house sat for family friends and I'm not exactly familiar with their alarm systems.
RichardPencil 32
The owners installed a sex alarm? What'll they think of next?!?
depressedvixen 16
So we're y'all the ones who set it off?
touch_the_sky_77 22
That's literally exactly what the FML said
cootiequeen4444 11
I'm confused. You and your boyfriend were in the house..It has been more than a few minutes since coming into the house it seems when it then started to go off? how does that work? I figure if it was you and your boyfriend setting it off, it would have happened approximately 5 minutes after coming inside and not putting in the code to let the system know it's okay. Also how were the police able to know it was you and your boyfriend that set it off? even with cameras, I'm not sure the police could come out with that conclusion with absolute certainty. Seems more like they could say it was a possibility at most maybe. IDK. Maybe I'm dumb or don't really know.bow these house alarms really work, but the story, with the limited info given, doesn't seem to add up to me.
DraconicFeline 31
Maybe they set off a motion detector of some kind?
whatshuman43 8
So within 5 minutes you got freaky so fast that you didn't notice the "noises" you heard, were actually a loud high pitched alarm asking for an input code?
shesgotmoxie 10
The owners totally caught them on a security cam and set it off remotely!! Lol
raven_of_azarath 35
I was thinking the same thing.