Today, my boyfriend and I were going to sext before going to sleep. It was very late, but I said I'd stay up for him. He sent a text asking me if I was ready. Me replying "yes" was the last thing I remember before I fell asleep on my horny boyfriend. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was having phone sex with my boyfriend. About halfway through he went really quiet and started breathing heavily. I thought he was about to climax until I discovered he had fallen asleep. FML
Today, things were getting heated with my boyfriend and I told him that I was finally ready to lose my virginity. Clearly he couldn't wait to get started because he fell asleep. FML
Today, my boyfriend fell asleep during phone sex. FML
Today, I texted my boyfriend of 6 months saying that I was in the mood, and that I was in bed, and naked. He texted back saying "U got fingers, use them, im going to bed xoxo". FML
Today, I thought it would be fun to have a sex session with my boyfriend. I sent him a suggestive message, and 30 minutes later he texted me back to let me know he was done. FML
Today, while my boyfriend was sleeping, I got naked and sat on top of him. He woke up and I asked him if he would rather stay awake or go back to sleep, in hopes that he would stay awake and want to do some naughty stuff with me. His response? To grab my butt, and then go back to sleep. FML
Today, I was having really great sex with my boyfriend. I was on top and he seemed like he was really enjoying it. Then, I realized he'd fallen asleep. FML
Today, I went out drinking with my friends and my boyfriend met me there. We then decided to come home, planning an intimate moment. Once home, I got on top of him and went to kiss his neck. Next thing I know, I'd fallen asleep right before we'd even started. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were sexting, and he asked me if I would be naked and waiting for him when he got home. When he told me he was on his way, I took my clothes off and got into bed. What he didn’t tell me was he was bringing friends to pick up a desk from our place for their office. FML
Today, while talking online with my boyfriend, the conversation turned sexual. He stopped responding but I continued with the conversation. Then I got a response, "This is his sister. He fell asleep and I need the computer. I'll tell him you said goodnight, but not that other stuff." FML
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Top comments
clumsylobster 17
If it makes you feel better, he probably gave up and just watched ****
JMichael 26
It happens. If he cares for more than just the sex he'll understand.
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Comments (53)
AGB10 19
Maybe he suffered from limp biscuit syndrome after you fell off to sleep. Not the worst thing in the world and can be made up ;)
jaqlove 22
Say your battery went out and your charger was broken
Madrias 36
Or be honest. I've heard that works, too.
mamamc 3
Why were you texting???
laden_swallow09 35
Yeah! Phone sex is much better! And quicker than waiting two minutes for every text to come through. Touching yourself AND typing out words on a phone is difficult, since you're trying to do two very different, manual things simultaneously.
MrConcise 35
Texting using speech-to-text function is preferable for catfish and awkward dirty talkers. Can you imagine how many people feel so weird saying naughty things that it comes out sounding like they're roleplaying Urkel? And of course, I can't be a hot barely-legal 18-year-old girl over the phone.
BossPathfinderGM 14
One of them could also be in a living arrangement that would have required discretion. When my wife and I were dating we wouldn't have phone sex with someone if weI had roommates or family nearby, and I'm sure they wouldn't either.
Madrias 36
At least you fell asleep before you accidentally sent your sexts to your dad, or had a send-to-all instead. This... This is just a minor mishap.
prostar9993 15
And this is why my daughters won't have a cell until they're 18
cccook1547 14
Who's to say she's under 18? And to not get your daughter something that could be potentially lifesaving because you think that a phone is gonna cause her to become some dirty picture sending **** instead of sitting down with her, talking with her, making sure she understands, and trusting that she'll do the right thing shows you aren't ready to be a parent.
syed121417 22
Don't worry about it too much OP. It's better than falling asleep in the middle of sexting. He probably gave up, put on some **** and took care of it himself, but you owe him for another time, remember. Haha.
SplineMan 4
I'm not so sure you deserved it OR that your life sucks. HIS life might suck, though. Hopefully it's something you two will laugh about in the future :)
alex_jaguara 33
The way you wrote that fml,you seem like a nice lady.
annarcheer 19
just do it the next day its not like that's the only time you can do it.
wallmaria 15
so??