Today, my boyfriend and I decided to lose our virginity. When he saw blood, he panicked and started crying, convinced that he was bleeding out. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time. After he'd repeatedly told me not to worry about bleeding, and reassuring me that he'd take care of me, he passed out halfway through. FML
Today, when my boyfriend and I were getting intimate, I got a nose bleed. He gave me a shirt to plug it with and kept going. FML
Today, while taking my boyfriend's virginity, he started moaning, "Oh God! Oh God! Oh God!" He then started crying and praying. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate on the bathroom floor. Somehow my nose managed to start bleeding, so he bent me over the tub and kept going because he didn't want to "ruin the moment". FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were about to make love for the first time. The moment my bra came off, he started hyperventilating to the point of blacking out. So much for that. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were getting hot and heavy. He got on top and started kissing my ear when a warm liquid went down my neck. My boyfriend had a gushing nosebleed, which went threw the pillowcase and the pillow. I got cockblocked by a nosebleed. FML
Today, I discovered that my boyfriend gets a nose bleed every time he orgasms. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I decided to have sex. I was a virgin and he wasn't. About 30 seconds in he collapsed on me. I thought he was joking around and I started laughing. He wasn't joking. He was done. FML
Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. It lasted about 20 seconds, and he cried during it. I later heard him telling his friends he'd given me a "damn good pounding" and "made her cum 3 times". I wish. FML
Today, my nose started running while in bed with my boyfriend. I kept trying to wipe it off with my arm to avoid ruining the moment. My boyfriend then looks up at me in horror. Turns out it wasn't mucus; it was blood. And it was all over his neck, his shirt, and his silk sheets. FML
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Top comments
halcyon93 16
Why would he think he was the one bleeding out? If anything, you'd think he'd assume you were the one hurt.
KristaAaronn 25
I think he needs a sex ed class
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Comments (136)
808andheartbreak 16
My god. I'm cringing...that must've been so uncomfortable.
Philintheblankz 14
Don't just lie there like a starfish, OP. Call an ambulance! Your boyfriend is bleeding from his ******!
brandoneyez1 25
Did he not take sex ed?
DeathcoreDoge 10
well thats a bloody shame
ShowMeKay 20
Lol OP you should tell your boyfriend that he did the hymen maneuver.
mufasaniqqa 13
******* dumbasses. you two are obviously too young.
False_Stupidity 42
They could be old enough but uneducated in that department.
limabeans101029 21
22- We don't know how old they are, they might just have not gotten a very good education on the subject. Also, how does this make OP a dumbass? Her boyfriend was the one who got it wrong
newworldinc 8
Besides that fact that he's an idiot that's good it means he cares about you
Phoebe18 14
How's it showing he cares about her? He things HE was bleeding out not the OP
sarahmfighter 11
He thought HE was bleeding out...not her.
Phoebe18 14
Took me long enough to realise my mistake. Thinks* not things. My apologies.
hondajason72280 10
too young for sex obviously
ThePols 11
That's what you get when you lose your virginity at 13
Luluthus 41
Funny, I don't see any age written in the FML?
tuckmyster99 3
its a joke dumbass
tuckmyster99 3
that's funny!!!!
ladybugz23 13
your right....thats funny!!