Today, my boyfriend and I decided to lose our virginity. When he saw blood, he panicked and started crying, convinced that he was bleeding out. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time. After he'd repeatedly told me not to worry about bleeding, and reassuring me that he'd take care of me, he passed out halfway through. FML
Today, when my boyfriend and I were getting intimate, I got a nose bleed. He gave me a shirt to plug it with and kept going. FML
Today, while taking my boyfriend's virginity, he started moaning, "Oh God! Oh God! Oh God!" He then started crying and praying. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate on the bathroom floor. Somehow my nose managed to start bleeding, so he bent me over the tub and kept going because he didn't want to "ruin the moment". FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were about to make love for the first time. The moment my bra came off, he started hyperventilating to the point of blacking out. So much for that. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were getting hot and heavy. He got on top and started kissing my ear when a warm liquid went down my neck. My boyfriend had a gushing nosebleed, which went threw the pillowcase and the pillow. I got cockblocked by a nosebleed. FML
Today, I discovered that my boyfriend gets a nose bleed every time he orgasms. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I decided to have sex. I was a virgin and he wasn't. About 30 seconds in he collapsed on me. I thought he was joking around and I started laughing. He wasn't joking. He was done. FML
Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. It lasted about 20 seconds, and he cried during it. I later heard him telling his friends he'd given me a "damn good pounding" and "made her cum 3 times". I wish. FML
Today, my nose started running while in bed with my boyfriend. I kept trying to wipe it off with my arm to avoid ruining the moment. My boyfriend then looks up at me in horror. Turns out it wasn't mucus; it was blood. And it was all over his neck, his shirt, and his silk sheets. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
halcyon93 16
Why would he think he was the one bleeding out? If anything, you'd think he'd assume you were the one hurt.
KristaAaronn 25
I think he needs a sex ed class
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (136)
e_p_owen 7
(8) I just had seeexx & it feels soooo... HOLY SHIT WHAT THE ****, OMG MY DICK!
SweetestHeart93 18
lmfaoooooooo!!!!!!
BFons 19
He apparently wasn't ready.
gameover18 17
Remember when people said you have to be emotional ready. I never understood that. I think I understand that now.
worldclassrager 41
I don't think he didn't know the basics of sex...but it is true sex education doesn't give anything about breaking the hymen
jjones0818 12
Ugh! Too young for that! Should talk with a school counselor about this traumatic experience. Also, highly suggest mentioning it to the health teacher. Time to review!!!
Hiimhaileypotter 53
I wouldn't think he'd need a counselor... He's probably not that ****** up about it, especially if she explained what it really was...
summer135790 15
That sucks, sorry op
hmrhoades 18
What I'm wondering is why weren't they using a condom?
inolongercare 19
You obviously weren't old enough and mature enough to be having sex
The_Voytek_Bear 14
You werent cautious enough when breaking his hymen...
stargirl_95 24
Huh? I thought European countries had really good sex ed which is why they have some of the lowest rates of teen pregnancies and STD transmissions? Weren't you guys paying attention in class?
limabeans101029 21
58- I'm from England so it's probably different in Portugal, but I had quite good sex ed in terms of STDs and contraception but I don't think they taught us anything about actually having sex and what might happen (such as the hymen stretching/tearing).
jujuthefroggy_fml 16
As Europe is not a country, you can't just make a general statemant like that.
amisenho 11
#96: She said, "European countries," not, "the country of Europe."
nightdreamer13 9
I'm from Portugal and I can confirm that we do indeed have many hours of sex ed. This is a part of biology classes and there is more focus on this subject on 9th grade. Some schools even give condoms and tampons (for the ladies). What is most interesting is that many hours of sex ed focus on the anatomy so the OP should know this, unless he is more than 30 years old or he comes from a all boys private school... in that case there's no sex ed.