Today, my boyfriend and I decided to lose our virginity. When he saw blood, he panicked and started crying, convinced that he was bleeding out. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time. After he'd repeatedly told me not to worry about bleeding, and reassuring me that he'd take care of me, he passed out halfway through. FML
Today, when my boyfriend and I were getting intimate, I got a nose bleed. He gave me a shirt to plug it with and kept going. FML
Like a virgin
Today, while taking my boyfriend's virginity, he started moaning, "Oh God! Oh God! Oh God!" He then started crying and praying. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate on the bathroom floor. Somehow my nose managed to start bleeding, so he bent me over the tub and kept going because he didn't want to "ruin the moment". FML
Absolute beginners
Today, my boyfriend and I were about to make love for the first time. The moment my bra came off, he started hyperventilating to the point of blacking out. So much for that. FML
Raise the pressure
Today, my boyfriend and I were getting hot and heavy. He got on top and started kissing my ear when a warm liquid went down my neck. My boyfriend had a gushing nosebleed, which went threw the pillowcase and the pillow. I got cockblocked by a nosebleed. FML
Say it, don't spray it
Today, I discovered that my boyfriend gets a nose bleed every time he orgasms. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I decided to have sex. I was a virgin and he wasn't. About 30 seconds in he collapsed on me. I thought he was joking around and I started laughing. He wasn't joking. He was done. FML
Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. It lasted about 20 seconds, and he cried during it. I later heard him telling his friends he'd given me a "damn good pounding" and "made her cum 3 times". I wish. FML
Mood ruiner
Today, my nose started running while in bed with my boyfriend. I kept trying to wipe it off with my arm to avoid ruining the moment. My boyfriend then looks up at me in horror. Turns out it wasn't mucus; it was blood. And it was all over his neck, his shirt, and his silk sheets. FML
Top comments
halcyon93 16
Why would he think he was the one bleeding out? If anything, you'd think he'd assume you were the one hurt.
KristaAaronn 25
I think he needs a sex ed class
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Comments (136)
shaneroks 10
Are we all positive this is a straight couple? I didn't see a gender on this but couldn't the OP's boyfriend be the "catcher"? That may explain some things.
sarahmfighter 11
The OP is female.
otumboo 10
guess he never got the birds and bees talk
Recoveryben 15
The fact that it seems that he's not old enough to understand or have learned that at some point, points to the fact that you probably didn't talk about it before it happened. It makes me wonder if you two were mentally mature enough to have sex in the first place.
KandyLanter69 8
you guys are too young...
ofmiceandmya 16
My friend lost her virginity to her boyfriend and when he saw blood he assumed it was because she was a "satan worshiper" of course after calming him down he came to his senses though.
nitrog100 21
Contrary to popular belief, the hymen is not a barrier to be broken through. If you're doing it right, there shouldn't be any bleeding at all.
Anikaaaaa 31
I was looking for this comment! Apparently, everyone here believes girls should bleed their first times. That's not true at all.
jujuthefroggy_fml 16
If the circumstances of your first time are perfect, if you have the right morphology and if you are not nervous, you should not bleed. But as first times are not always perfect, bleeding may occure....
idioticmess 15
and to think there are 12 years olds more educated about this than OPs boyfriend is...
rivaraven 35
Oh my god, I'm a gay man and even I know, that girls are not supposed to bleed or get hurt, when it's their first time. If it hurts and they bleed, you are doing it WRONG! That means that you are not arousing her. And you straight men are proud of the fact that you didn't arouse your partner, that you hurt them and made them bleed? You ******* idiots. Take a sex ed class or two.
GrinchFu1 27
Congratulations!!! You lost your virginity to a complete moron, lol!
angrymexicanwee 8
Im sorry but your boyfriend is ******* retarded please do not have children with him