Today, my boss's obese bully of a grandson had a seizure. Being the only physician around, I had to rush in to tend to him. Except it wasn't a seizure as such. My daughter had found my taser and used it on him. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boss made me work a longer shift than usual. Not because he needed me in, but just so I'd finish at the same time as his brat of a son, and give him a lift home. FML
Today, I went to my grandmother's house to pick up her cat to take him to the vet. She forgot who I was and sprayed me in the face with pepper spray. FML
Today, my boss entrusted me with his car to run an errand, as I usually take the bus. I managed to get there and back safely before someone slammed into me while I was re-entering the lot, causing major damage. It was his wife, who thought I was a car thief. FML
Today, at work as a groomer's assistant, my boss said something that I didn't catch as I went to take a leash off a dog. I looked at my boss and said, "What?" To which she replied, "Be careful, he bites." I now have a two-inch gash on my finger from a 6lb fluffy Maltese. FML
Today, I was babysitting a new child. I guess she heard me tell her parents about my severe peanut allergy because she got a jar out of the pantry, spread it all over the stairs leading to where her fort was, and walked around with a baseball bat covered in it so I couldn't come near her. FML
Today, I almost got fired from work because a customer complained that I "threw up gang signs" at him. I was blocking the sun from my eyes. FML
Today, I had been sick all day, so to cheer me up my dad drove me to get ice cream. On our way back, we hit a puppy. FML
Today, I witnessed a car accident. Being an experienced paramedic, I rushed to the scene to see if anyone needed help. As I assessed the people involved, one of them pickpocketed me. FML
Today, I realized that my 3 year-old son, who is being potty trained, has better aim standing up to pee than his 30 year-old father. FML
Today, I found out that mishearing my boss and laughing at what I thought he said can make him think I'm high and nearly force me to submit to a drug test. FML
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Top comments
junkman6 22
The idea of an obese bully being tazered makes me extremely happy.
Shleebs 12
Shocking.
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Comments (104)
PleaseCall999 2
To be honest this sounds pretty worrying, it takes something pretty awful to tazer someone. Maybe you should try to find out why she did it and if you need to step in.
tehdarkness 21
Sorry, that's funny but you should have prevented her from accessing your taZer or taught her the dangers. I wonder how old these kids are?
Sweetpea22 14
The correct spelling is taser.
Samuel5463 12
Grammar Nazi
Mailman2121 15
People like you who cannot store a weapon properly do not deserve to get one. You are an irresponsible moron, no matter how fun it probably was to see an obese bully being tazed.
doggy1230 5
In my view, two cases here. 1) (Most likely in my opinion) OP's daughter is a young child, in which case OP I hope you get fired and sued to hell for being stupid enough to leave the taser where she could get it. 2) OP's daughter is old enough to fully understand her actions, where I hope OP punishes her severely for potentially getting him fired. In any event, I dunno what the kid was doing but I doubt he deserved to get tased. .....still. The image of a fat kid getting tased is undeniably satisfying. xD
Waredo_Dyrge 11
So you're saying that if he was, oh I dunno, maybe attempting to sexually assault her he still wouldn't deserve to be tased? Sounds like faulty logic to me.
Sweetpea22 14
Sounds like the bully deserved it.
buckdharma 38
Your daughter firmly believes size doesn't matter.
sabrinalynn22 19
This FML confuses me.
Eevee11 6
he deserves it
shaggystar 3
Well, If it was my daughter that tazed the bully, I would be proud of her. She is standing up for herself.
Cbeast18 3
You have won as a parent OP