Today, my boss gave me the task of firing a recently-hired coworker next Friday. This guy spends most of his off-hours working out, probably abusing the fuck out of steroids, and to whom prison is like a bed-and-breakfast. I fear for my life by this point. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boss told me to fire the unstable, former military, gun nut employee. He's been making death threats to his supervisors. FML
Today, my spineless shitwhip of a boss made me go fire a notoriously abusive employee. I had to act like firing him was my decision, even though I'm the secretary. Now I get to live in constant fear that the guy was serious when he threatened to find out where I live and kill me. FML
Today, my lazy bastard of a co-worker punched me straight in the jaw because he didn't get the promotion I did. Being his new manager, I fired him. A few hours later, I was fired for "abusing" my power. FML
Today, my boss called me over to his office; he wanted me to fire four hardworking employees. One of them was the girl I was going to ask out. FML
Today, at my new job at a funeral home, my boss threatened to fire me if I didn't "lighten the hell up" while dealing with our grieving clients. FML
Today, my boss is still refusing to fire my psychotic coworker, who's made it his mission to insult, annoy, bully and threaten me every day into making me quit. My boss is convinced the guy just has "assburger's" and that the company would get sued if we fired him. FML
Today, my boss decided to have the whole staff drug tested and fire everyone who failed. Out of an original staff of 14 people, only my boss, two coworkers and I remain. I now have four times my normal workload and am seriously thinking maybe I should've said "Yes" to drugs. FML
Today, I overheard my boss talking about me on the phone. Turns out he was drunk off his ass when he gave the go-ahead to hire me, and he's now searching for any excuse to legally fire me. FML
Today, I was fired from job as a personal trainer. Why? Because I was working out with a friend while off-duty. Apparently, working out with a friend on a day off means I am training them under the table. FML
Today, I was telling my coworker that I was considering quitting the shady, 50-shades-of-scum business we work at. He snitched to our boss, who quickly fired me on bullshit charges of incompetence, theft, and workplace bullying. I guess I'm not getting a good reference from him. FML
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Top comments
HandaPitler 1
Write him a note and sign it with your bosses name
ShannyAK 16
I get why your boss wants you to fire him, but that's not fair
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Comments (68)
gizmo92 6
I reckon op should fire that guy because he must be getting fired for forwarding the message to the boss about Tanya hahaa
bladomas 2
idiot... you have nothing to fear
jlpteo 6
That shit is kinda scary, hope you turn out okay!
katties 27
I have a friend that is really muscular. He does do protein powder, but would never do steroids. Very cool and harmless guy.
NellyFC35 19
Have witnesses......no get a body guard....better yet fire him by phone....good luck!
marti1497 10
Well, good luck with that.
BFons 19
Don't be a puss.
dont_doubt_me 29
If he can't be a puss, can he at least be a pussy? (:
xmaximusx 12
Grow some balls and do your job
Damitol 3
Good luck! Walk to your car with someone and pray you can run faster. Alternatively fire him and tell him your boss ordered you to do it...and give names. Haha
faygo_chick 5
It's not you firing him its the boss. If he doesn't understand that, when you come tell him then I see why he needed to be fired.