Today, my baby son latched onto my nipple for a feed, after a month of having to be bottle fed because he wouldn't latch. This would be fantastic, if it weren't for the fact that I'm his father, not his mother. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my husband and mother started supplementing my newborn son with formula, because they are such control freaks and don't like my son getting attached to me. He was doing very well while exclusively breastfed according to the doctor. But it looks like my happiness or my son's well-being is of zero importance. FML
Today, it was my brother's wedding so my mother-in-law was taking care of my 8-month-old son. When I came back to our room to check how things were going, I saw her "breastfeeding" my child. She said it was the only way to calm him down because he didn't have a pacifier. FML
Today, I leaned down to pick up my infant son from his highchair. He reached up and grabbed the first thing available to him: my nipple. I got purple-nurpled by my baby. FML
Today, my over-protective husband went into an extreme fit of jealousy at the sight of me breast-feeding our newborn baby boy. He's trying to make me bottle-feed our boy, because apparently it's "wrong" to let another guy touch my boobs. FML
Today, my mother-in-law said, "I just find I'm not at all confident bottle feeding a baby, as I breastfed all of mine." Thank you for making me feel like s*** for me decision to bottle feed. FML
Today, we ran out of milk and my 4 year-old son came up to me and asked if he could "milk" my wife's breasts for his cereal. Apparently, he thinks my wife doesn't love him and his sister is selfish for not sharing her milk. His sister is only one month old. FML
Today, I woke up to the sound of my newborn screaming. I frantically hopped out of bed and stumbled into the nursery where I was met by the priceless sight of my five-year-old daughter attempting to breastfeed her understandably frustrated little brother. FML
Today, my 11 month-old son stopped saying mom and started saying dad. He already looks exactly like him. I can't help but feel jealous. FML
Today, while breast feeding my 7 month-old before his nap, I hummed his favorite song as I rocked. He pulled away, stared at me, and cried til I shut up. FML
Today, breastfeeding my infant has become so automatic that when my dog nuzzled up against me while I was sleeping, I lifted up my shirt and unhooked my nursing bra. FML
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Top comments
that1guy1 13
Hey, it's a step in the right direction!
Mennooboer 12
Manboobs ftw. =D
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Comments (182)
KiddNYC1O 22
Quickly swap with mom and keep it that way.
dtemple1110 6
Were you trying to make your baby suck on your nipple? Creep.
KiddNYC1O 22
What? He was just getting in touch with his feminine side...(ref.)
melimeli628 10
Your pic ftw!
leadman1989 16
I don't want to say gay baby... wait no I do it's actually really fun to say try it. At least you know he's happy. :D
Rasetsu 10
EEEEEEEEWWWWWW. I SO wish I hadn't read this. Ugh...
remz89 3
Grow up
cj7geojeep 0
Typical twilight fan
aFreedom127 9
So why do men have nipples?
KiddNYC1O 22
To scare you...
perdix 31
So we can torture each other with Titty Twisters.
RedPillSucks 33
Where else would you put your nipple ring?
YouBelongWithMe 0
Cuz god made em that way.
intothecrypt 3
Everyone has thumbs up except the religious comment, I wonder why...
RegiFrost 0
thats awesome and funny all at once.
bizarre_ftw 22
That child's future is not so much bright as...... Well let's just say no exactly bright. "would you like fries with that?" "yes please" ..... "wtf?!" "what?" "you gave me potato peelings!!!" "yeah, so?" "I asked for fries!!" "what's the difference?" ^ not bright
ohmandapants 17
...what? You try too hard.
TheNotoriousOne 1
Hahaha ok Peter griffin
bassgod 9
Facebook status: "Casually breastfeeding my little angel'
RaquelW 7
baby steps!