Today, my over-protective husband went into an extreme fit of jealousy at the sight of me breast-feeding our newborn baby boy. He's trying to make me bottle-feed our boy, because apparently it's "wrong" to let another guy touch my boobs. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Leave us alone
Today, my husband and mother started supplementing my newborn son with formula, because they are such control freaks and don't like my son getting attached to me. He was doing very well while exclusively breastfed according to the doctor. But it looks like my happiness or my son's well-being is of zero importance. FML
Today, my husband was disgusted by me expressing breast milk while we were in the shower together. This is the same man who thinks it's funny to pee on my legs because, "It'll wash off." FML
Today, my baby son latched onto my nipple for a feed, after a month of having to be bottle fed because he wouldn't latch. This would be fantastic, if it weren't for the fact that I'm his father, not his mother. FML
Mr Knowitall
Today, I got pissed after my boyfriend tried mansplaining breastfeeding to me. I’ve nursed two children of my own, stocked and sustained two big freezers full, and still had leftovers to donate to preemies. He tried saying pumping "doesn’t increase supply" and that I just “got lucky” making so much. FML
Mommy milkers
Today, we ran out of milk and my 4 year-old son came up to me and asked if he could "milk" my wife's breasts for his cereal. Apparently, he thinks my wife doesn't love him and his sister is selfish for not sharing her milk. His sister is only one month old. FML
Today I left my 8-week-old with my brother so I could return to work. His wife took all the breast milk I'd packed out of the fridge and poured it out. According to her, it was “gross” and she didn’t want it near her food. My son is allergic to formula. FML
Bittie
Today, it was my brother's wedding so my mother-in-law was taking care of my 8-month-old son. When I came back to our room to check how things were going, I saw her "breastfeeding" my child. She said it was the only way to calm him down because he didn't have a pacifier. FML
Today, I caught my pregnant wife trying to suck milk from her breasts. FML
Mind your own *******
Today, my mother-in-law said, "I just find I'm not at all confident bottle feeding a baby, as I breastfed all of mine." Thank you for making me feel like s*** for me decision to bottle feed. FML
Very helpful, dude
Today, I sent my husband out for baby formula and cocoa butter to soothe my boobs from breastfeeding. He came back with powdered milk and deep heat rub. AND he still wanted praise for at least having tried to get what I asked for. I would kill him, but I need his wages while I'm on maternity. FML
Top comments
Sierra_Rose_1 4
its your kid . tell him to get over it , you're the one that had the baby and not him .
exil5 2
Somehow I think he's either the stupidest guy on earth or he's joking.
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Comments (263)
Sierra_Rose_1 4
its your kid . tell him to get over it , you're the one that had the baby and not him .
Desfar 5
Actually, tell him if he has a problem with OP breast feeding the baby then HE can breast feed the kid.
doctorhook86 25
FYL for sure, with a touch of YDI for letting this crazy bastard knock you up in the first place. Good luck out there, OP.
killerkiss92 8
Over protective? That guy is ******* nuts
doglover100 29
I'd have him go to counseling for jealousy. Jealous of a newborn breastfeeding is just crazy.
zandalee 20
I agree it is bat-shit crazy. Get help.
tjv3 10
Wow what a psycho sorry op. tell him he either gets help with dealing with his insecurities or he can find someone else
license2chill 5
Pretty sure you don't want your baby to have the same kind of shock as stewie had, lol
Duladian 19
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
I agree he is over the top atleast you know he likes you.
ProfessionalTrol_fml 14
If that's the case, you probably shouldn't tell him where babies come out of...
Mideoyeo 12
I think you should be careful OP, his jealousy could escalate into violence.
juturnaamo 29
It's not an uncommon feeling, I'm guessing the OPs husband is just having trouble explaining his emotions. He probably feels like his kid doesn't need him since she's breast feeding, and his wife doesn't need him for anything other than paying the bills, since she's busy with the kid. Men get left out with new babies.
Llama_Face89 34
68- nice hat Noor ^_^
william8691 10
Babies are getting all the action these days...
doctorhook86 25
OP's husband is a ******** obviously, but #1 bugs me. The baby isn't "hers," he's a child and he's got a father in his life...even if he is a twit.
nabee26 15
OMG your husband is a f'ing idiot! He can't be serious! He is ridiculous! Yes, FHL for having such dumbass for a husband. Gessssh!
rainbowglass 5
I think I see Freud's theory coming into play here, with a slight twist...
rrriotgirl666 0
Wow, your husband needs some seriously intensive counseling. That is not normal, your man should be 100% supportive of you AND your newborn..breastfeeding is a beautiful thing. If your husband can't see that, (even after the counseling) then I would pack his shit and tell him "adiós!".
Harpy20 24
Must be some sort of reversed Oedipus complex...
jillybee101 7
172- if we're going to get technical here than technically it is her kid. By law if she was taken to court by her husband she would be given full custody due to his lack of thinking of the babies needs over his own. Yes the baby wouldn't be born without his sperm but in no way on this earth would that baby be born without the mother. No way in hell. It's her baby over his unless he magically popped the baby from his ass.
S182 15
-224 no way on this earth that the baby would have been born without the father...
doctorhook86 25
224: That's a ****** up attitude; babies are people not property. Yes mothers carry around the gestating fetus for nine months, but I refuse to believe that it automatically makes the mother "more important" or a better parent than the father would be--there are tons of bad mothers and just as many great fathers. The baby deserves the right to his father as much as to his mother; saying otherwise is nothing less than blatant sexism against men.
SammyS2012 21
Just because women carry the child, does not make her the sole "owner" of the baby. I fail to understand your logic. A baby is made by TWO people, and they both have equal guardianship over him/her. The child is theirs, not hers.
jillybee101 7
233- read really, really closely and what little brain you have might function slightly.
SammyS2012 21
There is no need to be rude. Their brain is not little and I think it is functioning fine. Youcant say that the mother has more rights over the child because she carried him. You pointed out the baby wouldn't be born without the man's sperm but then just because she carried him she has more rights than the father? Thats not right. Both parents have equal say in the situation; however, her husband needs to understand that there are many benefits to breast feeding; not that he's the woman's baby and she can do whatever she wants. And by the way, the mother does not always get custody over the child because she carried them. My boyfriend and his sister lives with their FATHER. HE had full custody of the children. They could only see their mother every other weekend. The court doesn't decide where a child lives because, "oh well she carried them for nine months! She deserves them!" it depends on where he children will have a better life. Sorry for my long response, your logic just frustrates me.
Haven74 6
Am I the only one that understands Jillybee's(sp?) point? If it happened to go to court, the mother would most likely be awarded custody because the father was putting his selfishness before the core needs of the child. The purpose of breasts are to feed the child. The sexual side of breasts is just a perk or, depending on the individual, a nuisance. Either way, OPs husband is being a childish douche who needs a large dose of STFU with a side order of intensive counseling.
Inediblepeaches 15
This is getting really legal... I'm just gonna back away slowly...
doctorhook86 25
292: Everyone seems to agree that the OP's husband is a dangerously jealous idiot whom the OP oughta be concerned about. That said, jillybee's point is that mothers are more important than fathers, which is bullshit, legal system be damned.
jillybee101 7
292- thank you! 397- I never once said the mother is more important. Both parents have equal importance. I'm stating that the mother in THIS SITUATION is more important because she is putting the baby first and not being selfish unlike the father who put his wants before the baby's needs. So you should really read more closely and stop putting words in my mouth. I apologize for referring to your intelligence negatively but you need to read more carefully and not assume things.
ZebraLiscious 6
Yeah He's a grown man I think he ll be fine
mollyjynxjax 28
Can we at least agree that, in OP's case, the father is a self-centered fucknut and that the mother seems to be the more competent parent IN THIS PARTICULAR CASE? You really can't make generalizations. There are good and bad examples of both mothers and fathers out there.
FML2_XF 3
Breast is BEST! keep it up OP :)
Sparks808 10
Yeah you should try telling him your breasts were made for breast feeding in the first place and if he's only going to allow one guy to touch your breasts it should be your son.
hama806 19
What a weirdo husband you have there OP! Damn! Lose the loser!
efemel94 7
Either way, that baby is getting more action than me. That's an FML in itself.
yupitssoph 18
I mean, he does realize that's what boobs were meant for, right?
SexySlayer1248 18
Studies show that not only is breast milk the best for a baby over formula but it can also be a bonding time with a release of oxytocin. Tell him to calm is inner Viking down.
Zimmington 21
imagine the rage when your sin goes through his "mommy" stage... or worse if he's a "Mommas boy" !! :o
TheStoryOfWazza 9
That would depend on the size I guess...
morgan020 0
Breastfeeding is a wonderful thing that really does need to become more normalized in the US. I love the question of where are your baby bottles. Ummm I don't have any. I feed my baby (3 months old) on demand any where any time and theres always enough at the right temp. It's great not having to carry a huge diaper bag either. A few cloth diapers and cloth wipes in a wet bag and we are out the door :) my daughter is allergic to disposables so we use cloth :) its actually a lot of fun. To be honest though my husband and my son were both a bit jealous of my daughter. My son was upset she ate all the time because it meant less cuddle time for him and my husband didn't like that she and I slept in the recliner most nights because she ate all night so it was the only way I got any sleep so he and I didn't get any cuddle time. Although it is funny when we have adult time and he grabs them and gets sprayed lol. I tease him about wasting the milk :)
exil5 2
Somehow I think he's either the stupidest guy on earth or he's joking.
MCRaddict15 15
It's hard to believe men like this still exist. ******** indeed.
itsgen 16
I totally agree, I kinda wana say ydi for marrying a bitch who thinks that way
menacingsprite 3
No, completely serious. There men like this that still exist and they deserve to be shot. Effing idiot. Your life sucks OP too bad you found out your husband is a tard-o this way.
hollywoodt1ts 15
definitely the dumbest ******* asshole alive
snowboarder531 5
Well he's just being childish.
whatsup215 0
I agree !! Anyone ever see "Grown Ups" and the 4year old ask his mom for some milk hahaha :) if you Can remember the time and place you were breast fed ... You were sucking on the nip nip way too long ...
datoismyname 22
Aren't you just ironic today.
Lanewood 2
You shouldnt have cheated..
music_woman1 11
If he's jealous of your newborn son then there is a problem
yankfan89 27
I agree. If he was this jealous while they were dating why did OP marry him. He obviously doesn't trust her.
Rowdey 10
The kid's got game.
SqueakyChipmunk 22
Op's husband is way too insecure.
kotabones 0
The baby clearly had a bigger penis.
rampatmonkey 7
how did you stay with this prick for so long?!
AGhost5445 25
Man he's got some serious competition.
cradle6 13
I agree with your name choice. Your husband is damned weird.
pottymouthpanda 0
That's wrong.. You should consider seeing a counselor with him if he doesn't listen to your reasons about how that is completely ridiculous.
ImaginaryFoe 1
Please do this. I might be overly sensitive to these types of things but I know full well how bad this can get. It's perfectly normal for a husband to be a bit jealous of the baby since you are usually giving it all of your time, care, and attention. It is NOT normal for a husband to forbid his son to breastfeed because of said jealousy. This can go wrong in so many ways; please advise him that either he seeks counseling or another place to stay.
MerrikBarbarian 9
Let us hope your son inherited your iq not your husbands...