jimmy
Orangeville, Canada
Today, my 5-year-old son put my car keys in the microwave thinking that they would 'warm up' my car. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Anonymous
It's always in the most obvious place
Today, my toddler thought it would be funny to hide my car keys. After searching for hours, I found them in his toy box. FML
why do eggs explode
Calgary, Canada
Boom!
Today, while I was in the shower, my 4 year-old son wondered what would happen if he put 6 eggs in the microwave. FML
Mike
United Kingdom
Today, my 5 year old daughter figured out how to use the microwave, microwaving my brand new 3G iphone. It was completely wrecked. So was the microwave. FML
sunil
Calgary, Canada
Today, my 8-year-old son microwaved his pet hamster. FML
mrs14
United States
Today, I spent five minutes sitting in my car, panicking and tearing my purse apart because I couldn't find my keys. I then found them. They were in the ignition, and the car was running. FML
mister fixit? more like mister fuxit
New York, United States
Constant surveillance
Today, I made the mistake of taking apart and fixing a malfunctioning toaster in front of my five year-old. Two hours later, he tried to take apart a lamp that was plugged in. He shocked himself, broke the lamp, and set the carpet on fire. FML
Anonymous
I want to smell feet
Today, my idiot son incinerated his shoes in the oven. They were wet and he wanted to "quick-dry" them, so now the whole house smells terrible. FML
Anonymous
Canada
Today, I locked my keys in the car while the car was running because I got out to get the parking ticket attached to my windshield. FML
wtfdaughter
Recife, Brazil
Today, my daughter put a doll in the microwave "to keep her warm". She's 17. FML
Anonymous
Ängelholm, Sweden
One night
Today, I woke up after putting my child to bed. Drowsy, I stumbled down to the kitchen to make a mug cookie. I read a recipe on my phone, and put a knob of butter in a cup to melt in the microwave. I put my phone in the microwave and turned it on for 30 seconds, and didn't realize what I'd done until I smelt burning plastic. FML
Top comments
burrito_sama 16
At least his heart was in the right place?
Cads1 24
At least he cares. He could have put them in the toilet.
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Comments (108)
Warmonger_Smurf 29
Your son must be one gifted climber.
Cllama 10
I was able to reach the microwave when I was five with out climbing, easily. Also, if OP keeps a stool in the kitchen for a child to get their own things then it could be easier.
Brandi_Faith 34
Some microwaves are below the counter level now. Which really seems like a bad idea to me, as it just asks for kids to play with it.
ThatHorse 15
Well he warmed something up at least.
UserError94 18
Our hearts
91hayek 31
Dangerous. Still, rather he learn like this than trying to warm a kitten or hamster.
BubbaYoshi117 11
I REALLY hope that you don't have chipped car keys. I know my '08 won't start unless I use one of the $400+ keys that the dealer gave me.
lukian_fml 29
Pretty sure the OP did. Because otherwise this would just be a ~$30 FML for a new microwave? Also, your dealer is ripping you off, those keys are like $80 tops here.
SkylineFTW97 25
I think they're talking about smart keys. The ones with a starter button rather than an ignition switch. Those are expensive as hell, and they don't really add much in the way of convenience.
beeferjay 34
today, i tried to warm up daddys car and he got mad, FML
alanna_ann 14
he's only five I'm sure he didn't know
miyaviichan 27
How did you figure that out?
FelicityWishes 32
That's annoying but also adorable!
UhHuhHoney 20
I really hope you told him not to do it again, you don't want him to hurt himself.
amileah13 26
You have to admit that that was completely adorable, but definitely not safe. Probably his first and last time sticking something aluminum inside the microwave :)
Zarcissa 34
Or anything metallic for the matter. Hopefully your microwave didnt blow up, op.
Kuibe 18
I agree with #2 OP. At Least he didn't want to "clean your keys" in the toilet