jimmy
Orangeville, Canada
Today, my 5-year-old son put my car keys in the microwave thinking that they would 'warm up' my car. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Anonymous
It's always in the most obvious place
Today, my toddler thought it would be funny to hide my car keys. After searching for hours, I found them in his toy box. FML
why do eggs explode
Calgary, Canada
Boom!
Today, while I was in the shower, my 4 year-old son wondered what would happen if he put 6 eggs in the microwave. FML
Mike
United Kingdom
Today, my 5 year old daughter figured out how to use the microwave, microwaving my brand new 3G iphone. It was completely wrecked. So was the microwave. FML
sunil
Calgary, Canada
Today, my 8-year-old son microwaved his pet hamster. FML
mrs14
United States
Today, I spent five minutes sitting in my car, panicking and tearing my purse apart because I couldn't find my keys. I then found them. They were in the ignition, and the car was running. FML
mister fixit? more like mister fuxit
New York, United States
Constant surveillance
Today, I made the mistake of taking apart and fixing a malfunctioning toaster in front of my five year-old. Two hours later, he tried to take apart a lamp that was plugged in. He shocked himself, broke the lamp, and set the carpet on fire. FML
Anonymous
I want to smell feet
Today, my idiot son incinerated his shoes in the oven. They were wet and he wanted to "quick-dry" them, so now the whole house smells terrible. FML
Anonymous
Canada
Today, I locked my keys in the car while the car was running because I got out to get the parking ticket attached to my windshield. FML
wtfdaughter
Recife, Brazil
Today, my daughter put a doll in the microwave "to keep her warm". She's 17. FML
Anonymous
Ängelholm, Sweden
One night
Today, I woke up after putting my child to bed. Drowsy, I stumbled down to the kitchen to make a mug cookie. I read a recipe on my phone, and put a knob of butter in a cup to melt in the microwave. I put my phone in the microwave and turned it on for 30 seconds, and didn't realize what I'd done until I smelt burning plastic. FML
Top comments
burrito_sama 16
At least his heart was in the right place?
Cads1 24
At least he cares. He could have put them in the toilet.
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Comments (108)
DarkusOmegaX 14
I just keep my car keys in a place my little sister can't reach or doesn't know about. When that fails, I just keep them on my person.
NotCharlieRost 15
How can he reach the microwave? Did you not expect he would do something eventually with the microwave in reachable place?
tinyalmeida 11
Aw that is really sweet and will be a cute story to tell someday long after you have replaced the microwave that is undoubtedly ruined.
Jared_McPanda 12
I put a spoon in the microwave when I was five, I thought it would make food...
tiredofwaiting 25
Awww his heart was in the right place. We were young and naive.
KagamineRinny 14
"the ol' spicy keychain"
tman1985 9
He's going places. Maybe not college, but places.