Today, while I was in the shower, my 4 year-old son wondered what would happen if he put 6 eggs in the microwave. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my 5-year-old son put my car keys in the microwave thinking that they would 'warm up' my car. FML
Today, one of the kids I was babysitting tried to hard boil eggs using the microwave. You cannot hard boil eggs using the microwave. It makes a mess. This we have learned. FML
Today, after boiling eggs my whole life, I wanted to try a packaged hard-boiled egg for the first time. I'd never had a cold egg before, so I thought it would be a good idea to warm it up. Now, I'm cleaning out a billion pieces of egg shrapnel in the microwave. FML
Today, I was sitting on the couch watching TV when I felt something crack on my head. My 6 year-old son had just smashed an egg into my hair. When I asked why, he said, "Mom does it for TikTok." This is how I found out that my wife has been "pranking" him for likes, and thinks it's hilarious. FML
Today, I was waiting for the pan to heat up so I could make myself scrambled eggs. Just then, my mom runs up to me, cracks an egg open on my head, and runs away laughing. I only had one other egg. FML
Today, my eight-year-old microwaved our thermometer to see if the temperature would change. FML
Today, my 8-year-old son microwaved his pet hamster. FML
Today, my shower is being renovated so I washed my hair in the kitchen sink. I put my two year-old son on the counter next to me so I could keep him close. As I was rinsing out my hair, my son started playing with the light switches. He flicked the garbage disposal by accident. FML
Today, my 7-year-old son proudly announced that he had laid an egg during the night. I checked. He'd simply shat the bed. FML
Today, I found out you really can burn down a kitchen by boiling an egg. FML
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Top comments
strike2867 13
Sounds like a great opportunity to teach him to clean a microwave.
jenninyc1128 17
The wonder of having small kids.. Good luck with that clean up!
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Comments (109)
anythingrandom 23
So what happened?
One_Way 43
Read OP's username. The eggs exploded.
anythingrandom 23
I was being sarcastic, but okay.
Mysterious_one 26
Seriously.. I wonder what would happen for the eggs.. Im too responsible to do such a thing.. Let me YouTube it
xxmollyxx 25
You might want to look up the definition of sarcasm, 12.
Earl_KarmasBitch 36
What happened? The same thing as if you put one egg in the microwave but 6 times as bad.
jackthekeeper 24
Damn I thought chickens would hatch
jenninyc1128 17
The wonder of having small kids.. Good luck with that clean up!
theplaguedkitten 5
at least it wasnt on the walls or ceiling
timaeusTestified 15
#102, how do you know it didn't get on the walls or ceiling?
illusionay 10
Must have been egg-xtremely hard to clean up the mess.
anythingrandom 23
I am egg-static of seeing everyone making egg puns.
Ilmoran 20
Eggs-ellant puns! They're really cracking me up.
fuckpotato 12
eggs.
cfsimp 2
thank you for your contribution
YumeWolf 23
Kids are too curious sometimes. Hope you could clean up the mess!
sturschaedel 27
Or the kid wanted to do something nice for mommy and make breakfast. But yeah, having to clean this up is a true FML.
Atromus 13
I bet they exploded that must suck to clean. What an egghead.
higgysaurus 18
That would be a smart bet, seeing as its OPs name. And he is 4, is it really necessary to call him an egghead? Seeing as a lot of young children have the same level of curiosity.
MeowntainMix 18
As far as I'm concerned, all young children are eggheads, and that's not necessarily a bad thing
RecklessNapkin 16
#5 eggs do egg-splode
callsign_banana 19
He might've been a little scrambled at the out come, but you got to look at the sunny side of things. ;)
False_Stupidity 42
Eggsactly, if you keep things sunny then everything will be allwhite.
marko1596 24
I'm actually kinda blown away at how surprisingly good you both made those puns work haha nice one
alitairi 18
found the redditors.
Quiggles789 16
So who was watching him that could have prevented this? I'd like to know if he was alone while you were in the shower. Who knows what he could get into during that time.
Angelrose2004 17
You don't have kids, do you? Try watching your dog or cat every second of the day and let me know how that works out for you. 15 seconds is all a child needs to get into something.
pita2423 10
less than that make it like three
princessjessa 10
Comparing a dog and cat to a child is absolutely stupid to me. What dog is going to put anything in the microwave...
higgysaurus 18
#22 the comparison was made of cats and dogs as a whole and younger children as a whole, not the specfic microwave incident. And its a good comparison, both have a knack for getting into things they shouldn't, and for that reason both require a good amount of attentiveness.
Redgy22 26
I do have kids & you never take a shower while there is no one to watch them. That's ridiculous.
philosophicallll 25
@7, What if she is a single mom? What if he was in front of the TV or something and she hoped to slip away for just a moment to have a shower? Don't be so quick to hand out criticism, not everybody wants to hear your advice. Laugh at the kid maybe, leave your vote and move on.
Quiggles789 16
I do have kids actually. I am a single parent. To those of you who pointed out the single parent idea, I totally get there may not have been someone else to watch him. The fact he could have gotten hurt was more of the point I was getting at. I'm not bashing the OP in the least. Sorry if it came across that way!
OneFourNine 9
It is not easy to be a mother and no matter how much you try, you can not have eyes on your children at all times.
acruse21 8
Some women are single moms and can't get a baby sitter for every time they need a shower
sturschaedel 27
Especially IF you are a parent though you should know that you usually CAN trust a four year old not to hurt himself if you let him out of your sight in your own home for five minutes, especially if he was asleep or engrossed in playing or a video when the mom hopped in the shower. Yeah, there might be stuff he can get into and you might have a mess to clean up afterwards, but by the time your kid is four you have all the dangerous stuff like the knive drawer, glassware, windows, doors and stairs childproofed anyways.
LosinIt2008 14
you don't have children I'm guessing? it's really hard being a parent and being able to shower shit or even shave lol if a parent always has to be there when are we allowed to pee alone?! signed a very frustrated parent!
strike2867 13
Sounds like a great opportunity to teach him to clean a microwave.
vikky538 29
Not just that. Its very dangerous too. One of my stupid friend got third degree burns while doing that.
demix_fml 32
This sounds like something I'd do. It made me giggle. Maybe get a chemistry set for Christmas. Hope it cleans up okay.
WCARlover 35
That sucks but it's better than a fork or something