Today, my 5 year old daughter figured out how to use the microwave, microwaving my brand new 3G iphone. It was completely wrecked. So was the microwave. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I left my daughter with a babysitter for the first time. When I came home, my microwave was ruined because they had attempted to heat cans of Play-Doh as a science experiment. FML
Today, I read a seemingly serious article online about giving your smartphone some extra charge by putting it in the microwave for one minute. My phone is now fried. FML
Today, my 5-year-old son put my car keys in the microwave thinking that they would 'warm up' my car. FML
Today, I found my daughter's brand new ipod touch. At the bottom of the washing machine. FML
Today, as I was texting a friend, I was going to warm up some cold pizza. As I got finished with a text I put the pizza in the microwave and set the timer. After the timer ran out, I opened the door and smelled burnt plastic. Turns out phones aren't meant to be in the microwave. FML
Today, I've come to the conclusion that my phone addiction is getting out of control after I typed my PIN code into the microwave. FML
Today, my 3 year old kid wanted to do something nice. I told him he could pick up some of his toys. He washed my new Iphone instead. FML
Today, I dropped my 400 dollar iphone, that's been through toilets and 6 foot falls, on a walmart floor and shattered the screen. I managed, however, to catch the 2 dollar macaroni and cheese before it hit the ground. FML
Today, my history teacher confiscated my iPhone. She dropped it on the way back to her desk, and I now have a shattered iPhone screen to fix. FML
Today, I woke up after putting my child to bed. Drowsy, I stumbled down to the kitchen to make a mug cookie. I read a recipe on my phone, and put a knob of butter in a cup to melt in the microwave. I put my phone in the microwave and turned it on for 30 seconds, and didn't realize what I'd done until I smelt burning plastic. FML
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Top comments
jchansfan 0
Wanna destroy your microwave!?! There's an app for that. =)
V8pwrdz28 0
hope you dont have any small pets.
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Comments (80)
noshitsherlock 0
Parenting FAIL: you could have taught her that the microwave is ONLY for food items. But... you didn't. Keep that little demon away from the genius that throws hairspray into the fireplace!
sydefx 0
Good job. Leaving a 5 year old unattended with your phone.
tabrium 0
damn dude
theblueone4 0
...i don't know, shouldn't most five year olds know better? it just seems like they should KNOW by that age that the microwave is OBVIOUSLY only used for food items. then again...maybe she was just mad at you and wanted revenge XD
kukopia 0
The kid can learn to use the microwave, then she can learn about consequences of her actions. Take away her favorite thing until you can afford a new microwave and phone. And no happy meals for her until then either.
meezer008 0
i agree with #2 but then again i cant judge the iphone if ive never had one
railfan_fml 0
you guys that are saying OMFG GIVE THAT BRAT A SPANKING!!!!!: spanking does not teach children anything. It is, like that one dude said, just an outlet for the parent's anger. all it does is teach children that violence is an acceptable way to solve problems. to whoever said non-violent punishment creates spoiled, uncontrollable thugs: it doesn't. Not spanking teaches children that there are other ways to solve problems. Last time I checked, 'thugs' were generally violent people. Maybe a result of violent punishments? to the OP: be more careful/watchful, and take away some privileges. problem solved.
pursuethemoment 0
your kid is hilarious!
Bloodknight 22
YDI. Should have got the 3GS.
masdar 0
ya spanking doesn't teach anything..thats y in my day my dad would use the belt.