Today, my 17-year-old son hacked off the legs of his bed with a saw. His explanation? "The bed looks cooler closer to the floor." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my wife asked our 17 year-old son to clean his room. Following up, he lied to his mom and said it was clean. After rechecking his room, he began to throw things and I returned to find holes punched in the walls. I went and patched the holes, after which he immediately kicked more holes. FML
Today, my 4-year-old son cut half of my hair when I was asleep because he thought I would look better that way. FML
Today, my 18 year old son asked me to check if there were any monsters under his bed. FML
Today, my 18-year old son decided to run his hand over our wooden fence to try and get a splinter, as he "forgot what they felt like." Last month, he stabbed himself in the arm with a sewing needle because he "forgot what an injection feels like." I raised this idiot. FML
Today, my nineteen-year-old son attempted to mug me. With a screwdriver. FML
Today, I discovered my 18 year old son has been peeing on the carpet when he is too lazy to get out of bed in the morning and blaming it on the cat. FML
Today, I found my 15-year-old son sleeping on the couch. I asked why, and he said he'd rented his room out to someone on Craigslist to make extra money, so he was getting used to sleeping in the living room instead. FML
Today, I found my 6 year-old daughter upstairs, lying on the floor with scissors. She was giving, "the carpet a haircut." FML
Today, I found out that there is literally a giant hole in my son's bedroom because my son wanted to build a "secret entrance." FML
Today, my 12-year-old son played QWOP on my laptop. Half an hour later, he virtually destroyed it in a fit of rage. FML
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Top comments
Welshite 40
Just throw him a blanket and let him sleep on the floor. He'll be the coolest kid in the neighborhood.
tacojauns 45
If he cut it so the whole bed is level I'm impressed
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Comments (143)
Daryen_rawwwr 7
well I sure hope its not a car bed.... wouldnt want him to think hes sleeping in a low rider bed.
TheAbstract 15
hacked off the LEGS.. not the wheels.
ajruok 8
I thought it said hacked his legs off in bed....got scared
CallMeMcFeelii 14
You guys are missing the point.. Think of how the bed feels! He was a tall, dark, handsome king. Now all the twin beds make fun of him and call him a queen.. Poor bed.
nightbirdblue 27
I reread it twice and still though it said that, 42. I was in shock. I had to show it to my friend sitting next to me before I realized what it actually said.
yoyoforpeace 14
Punishment: hack off his legs and tell him he looks cooler closer to the ground.
tacojauns 45
If he cut it so the whole bed is level I'm impressed
golden_warrior 23
How is that impressive? Take a saw to the four legs and you will get an even bed...
tacojauns 45
because you can't just take a handsaw to something and expect it to be level, unless you cut PERFECTLY straight, and you cut the same measurement on all four legs
suboy 10
If the legs had grooves on them i dont think it would be that hard to cut at the same spot.
senseoffender 2
But if u cut the entire legs off all 4 corners the bed will lay flat on the ground therefore will be even...it's not that hard lol
tacojauns 45
He said closer to the floor not on the floor... and again you need to cut PERFECTLY straight or it will wobble
senseoffender 2
Op also said hacked off THE legs not PART of the legs so still not that's hard to make an even cut and on the floor is closer to the floor then where the bed was originally
tacojauns 45
I don't know why I keep replying so this will be the last. It's harder then it looks to make it level, if you're defending that it's easy you haven't tried it before. Goodnight and Peace Out
senseoffender 2
Or maybe you are just to dumb to realize what I mean if u get rid the ENTIRE leg on each corner there will be no more legs on the bed if u don't have any legs on the bed to even and if u can't do that then u should put on a helmet :)
Cartera 10
70 - Get out. Now.
senseoffender 2
Lol I will wen people stop saying stupid things I mean the guys arguing that its difficult cut the bed shorter evenly wen on fact it's quite easy I mean come on is it really that hard to completely saw the legs of a bed??? I'm mean honestly can someone explain what makes it so difficult???
SomeRandomGuy15 18
72- Dude, if you haven't even tried it before, you shouldn't be arguing about it.
senseoffender 2
I did it for my nephew dude wen I was 15 took me like 5 minutes. All u need is measuring tape measure the length u want to remove make a mark their any saw carefully thru what makes that so difficult???
Cartera 10
77 - GET OUT.
senseoffender 2
I mean I guess if u don't cut thru the wood straight yes it will wobble but it only takes a little cordination to cut thru it straight...either I'm not being clear or u guys just don't no wat ur talking about...
MerrikBarbarian 9
If you are using a table saw, long as you measure accurately, no it's not hard to get something even... They used a hand saw. If you have ever used a hand saw you will know why getting it level is impressive and requires a very steady hand.
Welshite 40
Oh my god, people. Senseoffender is a troll; his name is an obvious hint. Stop replying to him, for the sanity of all.
senseoffender 2
Well yea but I mean I used a hand saw I used a block of wood to steady the cut which made it incredibly easy which I assume someone would do but ur right if that wasn't wat was done the. I agree it would be impressive
senseoffender 2
Well yea but I mean I used a hand saw I used a block of wood to steady the cut which made it incredibly easy which I assume someone would do but ur right if that wasn't wat was done the. I agree it would be impressive
theeiffeltowel 11
At least he's being creative and unless the bed cost an obscene amount of money theres no harm done x)
Welshite 40
Just throw him a blanket and let him sleep on the floor. He'll be the coolest kid in the neighborhood.
perdix 31
#3, not so fast. He'd still be a dweeb compared to the really cool kids who sleep under the floorboards.
Welshite 40
I guess being stuck in Noor's basement makes you the coolest of them all.
perdix 31
#31, I am now that she got me cable and I can see my "Seinfeld" reruns. Before that, I had to watch homemade videos of her Noor and perdix finger puppet shows -- they were amateurish and creepy.
Welshite 40
Excuse me, but I helped produce those films! Anyway, you should be more appreciative. I was going to kill you off at the end, but Noor decided the story would be better if you lived your days as KaySL's sex slave.
perdix 31
#54, no, not that! More hot sex with young women? Anything but that! Aiiiieeeee! PS: if you haven't read B'rer Rabbit, don't bother.
Wittledinosaure 7
Maybe it does? What's wrong with wanting to feel cool? Bet it was because of the boogeyman under the bed.
asbmf 7
Wrecking property that someone else paid for is what's wrong with it.
evilplatypus 39
If the OP gave it to them, it is the property of OP's kid. That's what happens when you give someone something. Though it's perfectly possible OP bought their own bed. I bought my first queen bed at 16.
Eire17 15
Well, that makes no sense :P
FMLprincess023 13
Oh CUT it out...how could you LEG this happen?!
steffi90 13
Your comment actually made me cringe :-|
Ranimal 12
#9 - Just quit. Please.
Zaros_fml 24
Study #9's comment, folks. This is a prime example of trying too hard.
Fuhkyoo 17
everyone mellow out... did you expect a kitten to nail a pun on its first try?
BradTheBrony 19
Yeah, at least everyone SAW what he did there.
Queensland 27
Well, I liked your puns #9
NeyNeyDaDa 21
I liked her puns too.
golden_warrior 23
Why don't be idiot take the bed frame out and put the mattress on the floor and sleep on it? It's an easier way...
Melpomena 4
Oh God, I should sleep more. I read that as "hacked off his legs on the bed" and seriously went WTF for a moment.
SofiaFaolan 8
I had the same first reaction. I was very concerned
bellydancer82 15
I did the same thing!! Glad I'm not the only one haha.
SerendipityRose 26
Same here... For a moment I could only think, "that kid is insane". & that he must have gotten it from his parents seeing as how they're posting an FML about it, rather than weeping over the death of their child from massive blood loss.
Angel91baby 5
I read it as the exact same thing. Unfortunately, it is only 10.15pm here, so I don't have being tired as an excuse!
DFresh503 8
This would make sense if OP was Jigsaw...
LegolasPrincess 10
Why didn't he just put his mattress on the floor instead of ruining a perfectly good bed frame?
RedPillSucks 33
Because many teenagers don't use most of their brains.
NoFlippinWai 24
correction: Most teenagers dont use ANY of their brains.
HowieDoIt 21
He has so much room for activities!
Morgiepoooh9822 17
Stepbrothers reference . You win
ashleighlaine 21
glad you pointed out it was a step brother's reference. I don't think anyone would have gotten it with out your help.
evilplatypus 39
I wouldn't have gotten the reference.