Today, my 10-year-old brother got the bright idea to urinate in my oven to cool it off. My whole house smells like burnt piss. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I ran into the living room when I heard the smoke alarm going off. Turns out, my friend thought it was a good idea to melt a plastic cup on my floor heater. He also thought the best way to put it out was to urinate on it. My house smells like burnt pee. FML
Today, I found out why my bathroom has been smelling so bad. My 10-year-old son has been peeing on the radiator, thinking it's fun to watch it steam and sizzle. FML
Today, my idiot son incinerated his shoes in the oven. They were wet and he wanted to "quick-dry" them, so now the whole house smells terrible. FML
Today, my not-quite-potty-trained toddler niece had a 'wee accident' in my bed. I used towels to mop it up and changed the sheets. Later, I had the bright idea to dry it faster by turning the electric blanket on high. Now my room smells like burned urine. FML
Today, I finally found where the awful lingering stench in my house was coming from. My son thought it would be funny to piss in the baby's humidifier. He's 16. FML
Today, my idiot kid brother set my shirt on fire with a magnifying glass while I was taking a nap outside. FML
Today, my 5-year-old son thought it'd be a good idea to pee into the heat vent in the hallway of our apartment building. The whole building now smells like urine. The landlord is a 6-foot ex-convict. He wants answers. FML
Today, I found out my 10 year-old step-brother has an obsession with fire, after he burnt all the belongings in my room, including a £600 guitar. FML
Today, my brother tried to sit on my head and fart, except he followed through. It didn’t make it past his trousers but for a few brief seconds before he ran to the bathroom I could smell it and feel how warm it was. FML
Today, my brother woke me up by trying to light my bed on fire. FML
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Top comments
Epsilonyx 15
I'd be pissed.
PaulB123 11
If he ever complains he's hot, pee on him. He'll get it.
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Comments (155)
PeypeyTheBeeotch 1
Wow...10?
sinking_fish 12
48- No, 12. -.-
ronski 41
Maybe he wants to be a piss artist when he grows up
hellokatie8 5
Well, he's not the brightest crayon in the box ... My question is , what possessed him to want to cool it off in the first place? It was going to cool itself off eventually, why pee on it too cool it down faster O.o
erika729 1
The only real way to cool down an oven is too turn it off **lesson learned
Okayitwasme 0
Sorry OP, the things kids do! My son let off bear spray in our house once. Took quite awhile to get rid of. Eyes would water, throat would feel scratchy. Had to throw out clothes, brooms, mops and filters. Good luck. I suggest a those fresh air car bombs. Put it in the furnace room and let er rip!
crabbyabby718 0
That's not even a hyperbole. It's a pun
lrgenesis 19
Try some lemon pledge.
jmiluminado 0
Nice!
wriptidez 0
300 might buy a new cheap one...
KnucklesDeep 5
Sorry about your damn luck for having a retard for a brother.