Today, it was my boyfriend's 21st birthday. Along with a pair of $80 shoes, I bought him a birthday cake, his favorite ice cream and a $15 balloon. I showed up to the party and he was very intoxicated. So intoxicated that he pops the balloon, drops the cake, and throws up all over his new shoes. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, it was my 21st birthday. I had a simple party with my boyfriend, with just a cake and a bottle of red wine. My boyfriend managed to get so drunk that he danced naked for 10 minutes, then told me I'm hideously obese but that he loves me anyway. FML
Today, it was my boyfriend's mom's surprise birthday party. I was sent to pick up the very expensive cake and dozens of balloons. Not only was it windy and the balloons flew away, I tripped and dropped the cake. In the driveway in front of all their family and friends. FML
Today, it was my boyfriend's birthday. After spending a reasonable amount of cash to get us a nice hotel room to celebrate, he decides he would rather spend the night drinking with his friends. They all threw up in the bath tub before passing out on our bed. FML
Today, It was my fiancé's 21st birthday party. It ended with him too drunk to walk and wailing about how much he misses an ex girlfriend of his that he dumped 4 years ago. FML
Today, my boyfriend turned 21 and got drunk at a bar. Being sober, I went through the whole ordeal: calling a cab, carrying him up three flights of stairs, helping him by the toilet, and taking him to bed. Just when I'm about to sleep, he gets up, pushes his shorts down, and pees on me. Twice. FML
Today, I threw a birthday party for my boyfriend. As a joke, my friend and I served him non-alcoholic beer to see how he'd react. After a while, he faked being drunk, using it as an excuse after I caught him making out with one of my so-called "friends". FML
Today, it's my twenty first birthday. My biggest birthday surprise was discovering that I'm alcohol intolerant, by vomiting my first beer all over my boyfriend's mother. FML
Today, my fiancé turned 21. I stayed up and took care of him for 3 hours while he puked his guts out. When I FINALLY get him to bed, he jumps up and rips the lid off a plastic container on the floor and pukes in it. It was full of all my yearbooks, baby pictures, and childhood memories. FML
Today, we were celebrating my birthday and my boyfriend thought it would be funny to shove my face in the cake. While the candles were still lit. FML
Today, my boyfriend treated me to a surprise romantic dinner, got me a huge balloon bouquet, a dozen roses, and a beautiful card for my birthday. Too bad it's his ex's birthday and not mine. FML
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Top comments
Jaywin 3
I would like to see this $15 balloon.
Sage1314 4
But he's still got the ice cream right? Let's keep this in perspective!
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Comments (215)
opinionator 0
#110: Liberals (feminist or otherwise) never debate that there is difference between the sexes. But we do believe that there should never be a lack of consideration toward someone because of his or her gender. My point was that a "boys will be boys" attitude inherently argues against conviction against those who bully or abuse a woman because of her gender, not that conservatives don't want to come down with the collected force of God's own might if they find a perpetrator who has been convicted. Decency has to do with treating people well and treating them with respect, not "the traditional things that guys and girls usually do." My wife does not exclusively cook, the way my mother (and, indeed, her mother) always did. I do not exclusively support the household, the way my father always did. This much is considered progress not loss, and is a significantly more "decent" and equitable division of labor than had been the case in my parents' generation. Were we to cling to "the traditional things," as most reactionary conservatives might wish, a black vote would count 3/5ths of a white vote, women wouldn't be allowed to sue their husbands in civil court for rape due to spousal immunity, and and sexual harassment in the workplace would go unchecked. The good old days weren't always that good. So you've impugned my gender (saying that I was a woman so that I could be dismissed as hypersensitive), my politics (saying that I was a liberal so that I could be branded a "pussy"), and my sexuality "KMA fagbag hahaha" (probably implying that a homosexual shouldn't get the same hearing as you). You add extras to the argument because you'll never beat me on the merits. You argue that I should reconsider my position "Cuz nobody on this post thinks your tite." Read the rest of the comments - I think #131 will prove you wrong. I'm guessing you're going to be dumb enough to make your next ad hominem attack about race. And I can't wait. ps. People take you more seriously when you spell, punctuate, and capitalize correctly. Even online.
coolbeanz90 0
:[ Sorry to hear about the balloon! You should have waited until he WASN'T wasted!! You will be smarter for next time! :D
pl8guy 0
take the ice cream home with you and eat it!
cyberhoy 3
i agree with tiltwrestler
NisPe_BITCH 0
Yeah, you can't buy boys anything or they break. Also don't lend them anything. Or they'll break it. Boys are clumsy.
herekitty 0
Sounds like a keeper!
neverland_fml 0
You picked a great guy. Sounds like you should marry him now and carry his drunken spawn. :D
AntiChrist7 0
he started the party and got drunk without even waiting for you? YDI for picking such an ass
chapelsen 0
What kinda balloon was it? A sex-doll? That's the only $15 "balloon" I can think of.
whomajigi 0
Who charges $15 for a balloon? And I say this as an ex-CBA.