Today, it's my birthday. Three people wished me happy birthday: Google, my insurance company, and the place I lease my car from. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, it's my birthday. My parents wished me a happy one via text message. We live in the same house. FML
Today, it was my birthday. Nobody said anything, not even my Facebook friends, who probably got a notification about it. FML
Today, it's my birthday. I got just three calls all day. The first one was my fiancé, saying he wanted his ring back. The second one was my best friend, confessing to me that she had been sleeping with my fiancé for the past three months. The third was the dentist's office, to sing me a happy birthday. FML
Today, it was my birthday. I got ONE birthday greeting: from my bank, telling me they were closing my account. FML
Today, the only person to wish me a happy birthday was a survey website. I took their stupid survey out of appreciation. FML
Today, I called my dad asking him to wish me a happy birthday. Yay. FML
Today, it's my birthday. My boss's birthday is 5 days away. Instead of wishing me happy birthday, the staff decided to surprise my boss with an early gift. We also had to take a picture of him with everyone. I work at another branch alone, and had to post the picture to social media. Happy Birthday to me, I guess. FML
Today, it's my birthday. The only "happy birthday"s I got were from my mom, her Facebook account, and the Facebook account she made for her cat. FML
Today, it was my birthday. None of my family members wished me a happy birthday and neither did the 1,000+ "friends" I have on Facebook either. FML
Today, it was my birthday, and my kids gave me my car keys I had "lost" a week ago. FML
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Top comments
abbttmc 12
Happy birthday now it's 4 people :)
perdix 31
Aw, shit, you mean your dentist forgot? If you show Denny's your driver's license, they'll suddenly remember and give you some free food!
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Comments (206)
simplysarcastics 26
Well if its any consolation, I wish you a happy bday!
effiestonem154 11
Make a Facebook next year and make your birthday visible. For some reason, people feel obligated to wish you ;)
Xatraris 38
For everyone else it works. I work with a guy and his bday is 1 day after mine. He set his accidentally on my day as well and everyone at work thought it was only his day. I honestly found it funny though, I could care less about what anyone says or does on Facebook.
imyy 20
Who is this Google person you mention? I wonder what it is like being named after a company...
GrinchFu1 27
I was gonna tell you something but I forgot what I was gonna say....
they_hate_me 6
Happy birthday OP
Ceejay1 13
Happy Birthday !
kbummm 8
Happy bday!! (:
rightspark 7
You already have one "F"ing account(FML) get another "F"ing account, Facebook lol. Happy birthday to you..
FluffyWizdom 15
HAPPY BIRTHDAAAAY ! :)
the_Glenn_coco 7
happy birthday :)