Today, I woke up with really dry, chapped lips. Still in bed, without my glasses on, I sleepily reached down into my purse for some chapstick and applied it. Upon awakening later I realized I had mistaken a mini Sharpie permanent marker for chapstick. I have a job interview today. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Chapped out
Today, I was having lunch with my mom before an important job interview. She commented than my lips looked dry and crackly and gave me her chapstick with aloe to put on. Apparently I'm allergic to aloe and my lips got so swollen I could hardly talk. It was too late to reschedule the interview. FML
Today, I awoke to make-up all over my face and nail polish on my hands and feet because my daughter wanted "daddy to look pretty." I have a job interview in an hour and none of it is coming off. FML
Today, I was talking to myself and got distracted when I was going to put chapstick on my lips. I took the cap off my deodorant and put it on my lips. FML
Today, my mom kissed me goodbye before I went to a big job interview. I got weird looks on the way there, but I figured it was just because I look like a massive douche in formal wear. Turns out my mom had smeared lipstick all over my chin. The person who finally let me know was my interviewer. FML
Real dream
Today, I woke up to find that I had given myself a haircut in my sleep. I have a presentation today and a job interview tomorrow. FML
Today, I used a glue stick instead of my Carmex lip balm. FML
Today, my lips were dry and chapped, so I asked if I could use some of my friend's chapstick. She didn't mind, so I quickly put some on. Only later did I notice that my lips were sparkly. Turns out it was glitter balm. Now everyone calls me "princess." FML
Great first impression
Today, while I was waiting for an interview, I picked at a something I felt on my chin thinking that it was just some food. I had a good interview, then I got into my car and looked in the mirror, only to see that I had blood smeared all over my chin. Turns out I had picked a zit. No one told me. FML
Pranks should be outlawed
Today, someone held me down and rubbed ChapStick all over my lips. I have a condition which requires medicinal balm, otherwise my lips crack and bleed, and ChapStick makes it worse. I’m still waiting on the balm to arrive. FML
Today, feeling social, I went to a bar. During a trip to the dimly lit restroom, I fixed my makeup, and carefully penciling my sparse eyebrows. After an evening of meeting new people, I went home. In my well-lighted restroom, I discovered that my eyebrow pencil was actually my bright red lip liner. FML
Top comments
collegegirl8 0
how does drawing on your lips with a sharpie remotely feel like putting on chapstick?
mylifesucks52 0
you can use nail polish remover. it wont taste good but its that or sharpie. you can also use rubbing alcohol
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (160)
PureGold 0
Sounds fake, but it still made me laugh xD I have a good FML sharpie story too haha...but it actually happened :P
400382 0
this is so fake....... how the hell would you NOT notice the difference between a freaking sharpie (mini or not) and chapstick? you must be one hell of a dumbass if this is true. LOL.
qkzp 0
don't ask how i know this but... sharpie comes off of your lips very easily. okay? it's not a big deal. not worthy of an FML, i vote. i wouldn't say YDI, but it seriously washes off of your lips easier than like... the back of your hand. you don't even NEED nail polish remover. as long as you take like more than five minutes to get ready for the day, you have time in there to wash off a little bit of marker from your lips.
cares2much 0
ive had sharpie on me plenty of times when my freinds and family play practical jokes on each other you can get it our really easily if u just use plenty of soap and scrub well
panda24 0
Man, people sure are having a lot of job interviews lately. Can we find a more original reason why such an embarrassing appearance-altering event is a humiliating thing?
EffYoLife 14
omg that had me peeing! PLEASE TELL ME U HAVE A PIC OF URSELF! and feel free to post it! omg *dies*
CaptainDDL 0
Scrub it off. :)
noobeater5 0
sounds like a bunch of lies
indian_goddess 0
sharpies don't feel like chapsticks...
jerabear 0
Umm... Sharpie markers smell. I'm having a hard time believing that you didn't notice that your chapstick smelled suspiciously like permanent marker.