Today, I woke up to the sound of something hitting my bedroom wall outside. I could see my boyfriend's car from the window, so I assumed he was throwing pebbles to get my attention. I opened the window and an egg flew in. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, as I was sleeping I heard something bang on my door. I walked on my balcony only to find my boyfriend throwing rocks trying to wake me. He didn't see me and threw a rock right into my eye. FML
Today, I found out that the loud noise outside my bedroom a few weeks ago was neighborhood kids throwing eggs at my window, landing on the AC. FML
Today, in an attempt to be romantic, my boyfriend threw little stones against my window. Unfortunately, the window wasn't closed, and I was standing in front of it. FML
Today, my boyfriend thought it would be romantic to throw pebbles at my bedroom window in the middle of the night. It triggered the burglar alarm, which woke up everyone in the house. If my parents didn't know I had a boyfriend before, they certainly do now. FML
Today, I snuck out to see my girlfriend in the middle of the night. When I got to her house, I decided to throw a rock at her window to wake her up. It broke a hole in the window. FML
Today, I went to egg my ex-boyfriend's house, after finding out he cheated on me. I covered his house and car with eggs, toilet paper, and silly string. When I went to get back in my car, my keys were locked inside, the alarm went off, and my ex walked outside, with his new girlfriend. FML
Today, my boyfriend tried to whimsically serenade me by throwing rocks at my apartment window and singing. He got the wrong window. Another guy answered, and now he thinks I'm cheating on him. FML
Today, I walked out to my car to see a broken window, a bunch of stuff missing, egg shells, and a note that read, "Stop banging my boyfriend." I haven't had anyone in my love life for over a year. FML
Today, I realised just how skewed my reality is when I was pleasantly surprised that teenagers threw eggs at my windows. They usually throw rocks. FML
Today, I was woken up by the sound of someone in my room. I started freaking out, thinking someone had broken in, so I kicked them, only to realise it was my boyfriend coming back from the toilet. I'd forgotten he was staying over. FML
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Top comments
perdix 31
I guess if it could fly, that egg was mostly hatched! The visual of an egg with flapping wings made me laugh, so I thought I'd share.
hoghunter 1
oops. I couldn't find any pebbles so thought eggs would be a good substitute.
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Comments (166)
amayaa_fml 7
guess you could say ex now
kristelle_fml 0
lmao 28!
alezmbgt 0
ydi for having a window haha. maybe there werent any pebbles so he got an egg? hey, at least he didnt throw more than two
MeaganJewel 0
LMFAO at number 43!!!
cul8r 4
Over here, houses are usually built of stone, brick, concrete or the like. If you threw anything smaller than a brick, you wouldn't hear it on the inside, let alone wake up.
RHCPJLZ 0
you should've asked him to throw some bacon too.
BoW2Me 0
open up my window and an egg flies in and I **** in my pants!
NoodleBurger 0
hahah! #165 thats perfect!
0xXprincessXx0 0
ASS :/
emilyrules41 0
was it Cooked?
sweetalicious 1
throw apples at him as revenge