Today, I woke up to my wife yelling at my 11-year-old because she found porn on the laptop. Now I have to come clean and tell her it was me so I can get him off the hook. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my mom kicked my dad out of the house and told him not to come home again. Why? I started watching some porn on my computer, forgetting I was still connected to the bluetooth speakers in the living room. My mom thought it was my dad, and I didn't have the balls to admit the truth. FML
Today, my wife reported our neighbor for leaving her son home alone while she works during the day. Her son is 13 years-old. I am so completely embarrassed and my wife keeps justifying what she did. FML
Today, my husband and I sat our 10-year-old daughter down for a chat over her recent cursing. When my husband asked where she'd heard the words, she "innocently" replied, "from mommy's other boyfriend." He took her seriously, accused me of cheating, and hasn't been home since. FML
Today, I found my son's porn. I would sit him down for a talk, but the genres were so disturbing that I'm afraid to even ask about it. FML
Today, I found out that while I was at college, my brother downloaded three terabytes of porn on my laptop and blamed it on me. My parents believed him. FML
Today, my wife woke me up, saying her husband was home and that I needed to escape before he caught me. I was still struggling with the window when I remembered I’m her husband and she was laughing, filming my half-asleep ass trying to escape from being caught by myself cheating with my own wife. Duh. FML
Today, I found out that my 43 year-old wife has been having a cyber relationship with a 14 year-old kid on Halo. FML
Today, I had to comfort my wife after she found out that her boyfriend wasn't faithful to her. FML
Today, I was having computer problems, so I let my friend have remote access to fix them. We were video-chatting on Skype at the time, and so he thought it'd be hilarious to load hardcore porn in my browser the moment he saw my mom enter the room from behind me. I'm now grounded. FML
Today, I found out that my wife has been having an affair with the guy who's been trying to get our relationship back on track. FML
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Top comments
mattzawesome 28
At least you're planning to admit to it, most would let the kid take the fall.
Shadowvoid 33
Well I mean the fact that she assumed it was the 11 year old baffles me. Put it in private MODE, no one likes to find **** they weren't supposed to see.
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Comments (110)
GeorgiaBea 28
I never understood yelling at a kid for being curious. If it did happen to be the 11 year old, now would be a really great time to talk to him about body autonomy and even more so, consent, and privacy. Not to mention safe sex, and all of things that go along with it. Seems to me that would be an awesome Segway for what most parents find to be uncomfortable to talk about.
deathrise007 22
What's with moms and ****? Freakin out at an 11 year old. Lord be with that kid.
itsme82 18
Wow your poor boy. I at least hope she apologizes to him. Op, may the odds be ever in your favor.
leadmenot 11
Damn dude. Do you not have your own personal phone or laptop?
guesswhatlifesux 14
Incognito mode, anyone?
bapbap_fml 15
I don't see why she'd be mad at you for it, unless you left it open and the kid could have seen it?
KILJOY310 11
You should of waited to post. Because the the real FML will be when you tell your wife it was you. That's the follow up story we all want to hear.
Oh_bother44 11
Most grammatical errors I let slide because I know that I, myself, make mistakes but this one is my biggest pet peeve- it's should'VE... Short for should have. Just a note :)
Geckosrock99 33
When my little brothers were 11, they would save pictures they liked and attempt to hide them in folders. They were using a shared computer after everyone went to sleep, but didn't know about incognito mode. Not all 11 year olds know how to cover their tracks. Good for you, OP, for coming clean.
deathshead 19
do you really have to tell her? sure its the RIGHT thing to do, but is it worth it? the simple answer is yes, good for you, you have a conscience
archi2000 2
I don't know why she would scream at him because even I didn't know what **** was till I was 14