Today, I woke up to a stranger in my dorm room. He was naked and was peeing into my water bottle. He kept asking for Chris. I have no idea who Chris is. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I woke up to a strange wetness covering my body. My drunk roommate's urine. FML
Today, I woke up to a stranger in my bed. Just as my parents responded to my screaming, I remembered that I'd helped my boyfriend sneak in through my window last night. FML
Today, my roommate decided to prank me by leaving a fake suicide note on the bathroom door and lying motionless in a bathtub full of water and red coloring. When I went, horrified, to take a closer look, he lunged at me and screamed. I was so scared I pissed myself. FML
Today, I heard a knock on my door and, thinking it was my student adviser, opened it. I was greeted by a drunk girl, who pushed her way into my dorm room, informed me that she lived here last year, and then told me that she lost her virginity in my bed. FML
Today, I was at a local club with my friends sitting at a table when some guys approached us. One of them started telling me about his recent adventures through Europe and was very interesting. Something warm hit my leg and I realized the guy was urinating on me. FML
Today, I woke up in my boyfriend's dorm and decided to take a shower before he woke up. I used the girls bathroom on the above floor, and afterwards just threw on a towel and ran to the elevator. I forgot to press my boyfriend's floor and I was taken to the lobby in a towel. People were waiting. FML
Today, I took a shower at my girlfriend's apartment. I was wandering around, gathering my clothes when I noticed my girl doing her hair in the other room. She looked sort of peculiar, so I stood there, studying her. Half naked. I then realized it wasn't my girlfriend, but her roommate. FML
Today, I woke up because of a weird noise. Scared, I turned on my bedside lamp. I saw my older, 17-year-old brother peeing in my bedroom doorway. He was hoping I'd step in it in the morning. FML
Today, my friend whacked me in the family jewels while I was washing my hands in our college bathroom. While I lay writhing in pain on the floor, a guy at the urinal turned around towards me to see what was wrong. He was still peeing. FML
Today, a staff member entered my room, thinking it was empty. I was naked. This is the second time something like this has happened in the week I have lived here. FML
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Top comments
xdyingxwishx 0
Haha damn, lock your door!
monkey314159 0
wtf... which college is this again?
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Comments (80)
badvoodoo 0
PCP
jessxoxo28 5
WOW...peeing in a bottle and asking for chris... thats just scary
musicislife1995_fml 0
well quite clearly you should know Chris ;)
turdburgers 0
This shit is exactly why I NEVER left my door unlocked. Someone on my hall last year woke up to a random drunk guy in her room. You never know who the idiots in your dorm will let in off the street.
LALALALagirrl 1
LMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMFAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! ommg, that made my day:)
FerrariCake 2
At least you have a funny story to share with the family during the holidays!
FerrariCake 2
Make a shopping list: 1. New water bottle 2. deadbolt for door
hedgehogs 0
You don't lock your dorm door?
The__Redneck 7
That's when you take an ax-handle and put a little red in that bottle.
nightmare1234 0
lmfao!!!he was peeing in a bottle?!??!? lolz never invite crazy strangers in ur place!!lesson learned!:)