Today, I woke up next to a beautiful, half-naked brunette in my bed. Two minutes later, my alarm clock woke me up for real. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Where am I?
Today, I woke up next to my girlfriend, but it wasn’t actually her. What happened last night? FML
Today, I woke up to my new roommate staring at me, just a few inches from my face. She then told me how easy I would be to kill in my sleep. Then she stood up, naked from head to toe. FML
Today, I woke up in a girl's bed, who I've had a crush on for two years. She was sleeping on the floor with someone else. FML
Today, I was sleeping with my boyfriend and woke up in his arms to hear him say "Mom, Mom." FML
Today, we rearranged the bedroom and my boyfriend and I switched sides of the bed. When the alarm went off, he got confused as to which side the clock was on. Instead of hitting the snooze button like he normally does, he hit me in the face. FML
Today, I woke up around 5am from a party I had last night, still quite drunk. This chick was lying next to me from the night before. I kissed her, and about a minute and a half into some heavy making out, she opened her eyes and said, "Oh, it's you." Then got up and walked out. FML
How romantic
Today, I woke up next to a slumbering girl I had just met the night before. She had all the covers on top of her and I was cold. Not only was I cold, but the sheets were really cold. So I got up and realized she'd peed a drunken night's worth of beer all over my sheets. FML
Drunk hookup ends with a… bang
Today, I woke myself up by farting in my sleep, only to realize that the guy I'd brought home from the bar was still next to me. He was awake. FML
Today, I got to sleep in the same bed as the love of my life...and her new boyfriend. FML
Today, I woke up to a warm bed, the morning sunlight bathing my face, and my boyfriend sneaking my credit card out of my purse. FML
Top comments
kirstyfaerie 0
only half naked? you're not very ambitious.
birchofacookie 0
That's weird. Today, I was having sex on a boat with a hot brunette. Then, I woke up. And Samus slapped me.
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Comments (128)
blahh12 0
lmao, this is hilarious
kirstyfaerie 0
only half naked? you're not very ambitious.
TheButler 0
lolz haha
Wicked_909 0
i know right YDI for being negative don't look at the girls as half naked but be positive n think full naked n STD free
Tenma_Hakase 0
This is totally an FML, like the time I woke up to a dick in my ass, lol.
whoretool 0
#4's got it. whered your nuts go?
ludachrisZ 0
lmfaooooooooo #5. CHUBBY CHASERS WOOT WOOT!
avely4 0
#5 - cut me in for some of that gay love :D
ZH13 0
lolz @ #5
24788 7
Lol, at least you can undress her with your mind.
thatonek1d 0
^kinky shit!
birchofacookie 0
That's weird. Today, I was having sex on a boat with a hot brunette. Then, I woke up. And Samus slapped me.
shanyo 0
What's with all the talk of gay loving?? Though come to think of it, I'm kinda curious now!