Today, I woke up to my new roommate staring at me, just a few inches from my face. She then told me how easy I would be to kill in my sleep. Then she stood up, naked from head to toe. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I woke up to find my new roommate staring straight at me. She then went on to say, "I love how you sleep," and continued to stare. I live in a residence off campus and I've already changed roommates twice this year. I'm stuck with a person who stares at me sleep for the next two years. FML
Today, I woke up to my creepy new roommate licking my cheek. FML
Today, I woke up to my psycho roommate trying to baptize me in my sleep. FML
Today, I was in minding my own business in bed in my dorm room. It was dark and my roommate came over, intending to slap my ass really hard. The problem is, I was lying face up. FML
Today, I woke up next to a beautiful, half-naked brunette in my bed. Two minutes later, my alarm clock woke me up for real. FML
Today, I woke up at my girlfriend's house. She was staring at me, holding a knife over my face. She ran away, giggling. FML
Today, I woke up to a burglar holding a gun. He yelled at me to get up so I did. He then paused and laughed. I was sleeping naked. FML
Today, my new friend and I went out to a concert. When we came back to her house, she ran upstairs and left me alone. Suddenly, a naked man came into my view and I stared at him, horrified. Great way to meet her Dad. FML
Today, I took a shower at my girlfriend's apartment. I was wandering around, gathering my clothes when I noticed my girl doing her hair in the other room. She looked sort of peculiar, so I stood there, studying her. Half naked. I then realized it wasn't my girlfriend, but her roommate. FML
Today, I woke up in my friend's living room after our sleepover. I heard her hot older brother and his friends in the kitchen. Feeling confident, I exposed my midriff a little bit just to give them a peek. They groaned and threw a blanket over me. FML
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Top comments
DahkLohd 4
Creepy.
MyNameIsBruce 0
Shut up. You tried to do it to Harry a few years back.
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Comments (242)
ComaStance 0
hahaha that's awesome xD
ACanadaGuy 0
pics or it didn't happen
lideke 1
In what way could that be awesome??:o
maybaybe 0
I know?! It's freaky :P
dcam13 19
Was she hot?
USAF_girl 3
Isn't that a movie that just came out about a psycho girl??
bh0p 0
The Roommate?
PeteyPablo12308 20
Ummm... Time to switch rooms.
stewpididiot 11
have her come kill me...
MaximilianMarche 0
you should do it back to her and she how she reacts
melanie177 1
44- Exactly what I was thinking!
capilot 10
For some reason, I'm imagining that your roommate is Summer Glau. That would rock.
DahkLohd 4
Creepy.
MyNameIsBruce 0
Shut up. You tried to do it to Harry a few years back.
abceasyas123abc 12
hahaha!
DahkLohd 4
Touché 61, touché.
ArielTheMermaid 17
61 made my day. Hahaha :)
sierralovesyou 0
Ummmmmm look at your picture, muh dear.
goomonk 2
Thats KINDA the joke.
metallicshadow 16
that's hot, yet pretty creepy
Trace01m 11
I was thinking this
morgs1 0
why do guys think this sorta thing is hot??
ramirezlmt 0
psycho's are great in bed! I say she's a keeper. Hey I need a roommate.
FMLephant 2
Because she was naked.
nerdsgetmehot 23
I'm a bisexual woman and I still think it's creepy and not hot.
ramirezlmt 0
Okay so your bi? haven't you ever had wild steamy hot sex with a girl cause you left out a dish? Or been with a women that bit and tear at your skin? Better than most girls that just lay there or get tired or sore when they ride hm good times and oh above all It's a joke.......kinda
nerdsgetmehot 23
#40 I wasn't referring to your "psychos are better in bed comment", I was referring to comment #3.
ramirezlmt 0
okay so what if I say psychos are hot? Lol and this was just fore play? Psh bet you like the stalker song by Clay Alken I ask what's the difference? He wants to watch you while your sleeping too.
nerdsgetmehot 23
#48 No, I've actually never even heard that song. And I wasn't dissing your apparent love of psychos.
Sirin_fml 47
Ramirez, may I suggest you pleasure yourself to some Smurfs episodes or something? This kind of sexual tension in the comments is really annoying for our users.
nerdsgetmehot 23
Sirin saves the day!
ramirezlmt 0
Gah I'm past the point of caring. um just cause your bi doesn't mean you can relate to guys, you simply see the beauty in women too. If you responded to me or not is be sides the point most of the comments are jokes anyways. So why are you and etc getting bent out of shape, but I promise you men would've acted differently. Unless you think OP is hurting and she needs you to defend her? men women naked girl= hot stalker=hot well women are far more complex but men really are that simple. BTW I'd F her but wouldn't date her.
Sirin_fml 47
Read my post, please.
heyimzim 4
haha I thought the same
bigantennaemay 3
eh, i'm a straight guy, and i think it's more creepy than hot.
sexylemon231 0
ty, me too
ThaMilkshake 0
that's hot xD
WiseGuy79 14
Wow psycho alert! Buy yourself a taser gun just in case lol
asinforasin 1
**** that, buy yourself a real gun!! :o
imac619 2
Run! She gonnna kiiiiiiillllll you!
LaL26 4
omg thats so scary :o yea #4 is right keep a taser gun wiith you !!!
stdancer4life 0
we got the same bday but u a year older
MLuckyCapoeirist 6
#89, that's why we have personal messages for.
jimmayboy 0
Hit that.
brenkite 5
I would
nerdsgetmehot 23
Whoa! It's like that horror movie with Leighton Meester that I keep seeing the trailer for.
mrbeastmode 0
seriously you look just like my friend
spyduhmahn 0
are you friends with Fred the YouTube sensation, cuz that's what she looks like
mrbeastmode 0
yeah...no
nerdsgetmehot 23
#106 That was really mean and uncalled for...Same goes for the person who voted that comment up. What have you got against me?
Teenaaluv 0
o u mean The Roommate with girl that wants be the other girls sis
rogerover 19
Their meanness is just a feeble attempt at coolness. You look lovely :)
mrbeastmode 0
^ i agree she does look lovely but really #176 and 106 are douches.
13Lina97 0
She looks nothing like the YouTube "sensation". You look like smosh's boxman. midget version :3
theubersauceness 1
It's Danbo
CupAndSilverware 3
she sounds like that she is going to ambush you in your sleep
macskapingvin 0
And OP has already seen the bush.
lukec3 0
^win
ColdGold 6
So is she.