Today, I woke up from the worst nightmare I've ever had. After tearfully explaining to my boyfriend, in detail, how bad this dream was, he told me to "put on my big girl panties" and make him breakfast. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I woke up following one of the worst nightmares of my life. I was sweating, clutching the sheets, and feeling sick to the stomach. I'd been dreaming of my wedding that's taking place next week. FML
Today, I woke up suddenly with giant bugs biting my legs. I screamed, ripped the blanket off the bed and bolted to the bathroom to recover. Turns out it was all a dream, and the person who needed to recover most was my shell-shocked boyfriend who had been sleeping soundly beside me. Sorry, babe. FML
Today, I woke up at my boyfriend's place with grumbling stomach pains. I left him in bed to go have explosive diarrhea in the bathroom next to his room. When I was done, I came back to bed and snuggled in next to his sleeping body. He rolled over to whisper, "I heard everything." FML
Today, I woke up early and made my boyfriend french toast. When he woke up, he yelled at me because it was his dish day and I was creating more dishes for him to do. He made me do the dishes. FML
Today, my fiancé had a nightmare and sat bolt upright in bed, claimed he had a nightmare where we were married, then his head hit the pillow and he was asleep again. That was his nightmare. Us being married. FML
Today, I dreamt my fiancé was rolling frozen potatoes onto my bed to wake me up. In reality I woke up screaming to intense cramps in my legs which almost reduced me to tears. I could barely walk for two hours. FML
Today, my boyfriend said he was going to give me breakfast in bed before he left. He walked over, threw some granola bars on the bed next to me and left. FML
Today, I woke up to my boyfriend making breakfast. I thought he was making it for me, so I sat at the table. When he walked over with his plate, he said, "Oh, I didn't know you were here!" I'd slept in the same bed with him last night. FML
Today, I was sleeping with my boyfriend and woke up in his arms to hear him say "Mom, Mom." FML
Today, my boyfriend had a nightmare, talking in his sleep about not hurting himself anymore or "auntie Nat Nat" will put him "back in the home with the mean doctors and the sicky medicine." WHAT THE FUCK? FML
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Top comments
nightngale 0
Isn't it ironic how he tells YOU to grow up, yet he wants someone to go cook him breakfast like he's a little kid who needs his mommy to do things for him. If anyone needs to grow up, it's your immature, insensitive 5 year old boyfriend.
abandonship 3
tell him to make his own damn breakfast!
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Comments (197)
heavenandhell 0
i agree with you #71
sccrgurl4 0
then i would have told him to put on his big boy panties and make his own damn breakfast!!
aback 5
At least you can do something about that nightmare of a boyfriend.
Mausler 0
thank you 71 for reminding me not everyone on the internet is ignorant Seriously people, you can't control how people feel. She opened up about a dream, he couldn't connect. It doesn't make him a sexist pig for trying to tell her to get over it. It was just a hit or miss story, and it missed so he made a joke. that's what joking is sometimes, saying something you wouldn't actually say seriously. Its a way of implying "imagine if i was really like this" and can often lighten the mood of a situation. So OP, put on your big girl panties, get over this FML 'cause your life ain't ******, and make me lunch.
simpsonman3000 0
i sure hope you made him breakfast or else you'd be having bad drams for the next week remembering him beating the crap outta you
Sativus 0
Suck it up, and suck his dick while you're at it. He deserves at least that for having to endure you acting like a child.
slydevil11 0
Actually in America, women look to men for finances because they were oppressed for so long. They were not able to get jobs, and if they did, they hardly received what men did when it came to pay. That is why in the 40s and 50s you see movies where the men take the women out to dinner, and they go to "make out point". Predominantly women exchanged sex, companionship, and house hold duties, in exchange for the finances that men provided. With out men, they wouldn't have been able to live a comfortable life. Times have changed a little bit, but a majority of women still have this mindset. Women still only make 75 cents to every dollar men make and many women still choose to not have a career and live off of their mates. But the OP should know the charictersistics of her boyfriend by now. Obviously if she didn't like it she wouldn't be dating him. Her standards don't seem to be high. I know allot of sexist guys who wouldn't say that to her. Even if a guy is sexist it doesn't mean he is a jerk, just vary narrow minded.
planbsk8er 0
I agree with #3
lakeylove 0
he is the cuase of your nightmares
omg009 0
well did you put on your big girl panties? lol just kidding in all honesty that was kinda a dick move on his part