Today, I woke up after a night of partying and went to the bathroom. That’s when I realized that after passing out with my shoes on last night, my friends decided use a black sharpie and play “connect the dots” with my acne. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I woke up after a long night of partying. When I went to wash off my face, I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror. My missing tooth was almost enough to make me overlook my black eye. FML
Today, I woke up to see my four year-old brother with a sharpie, trying to play “Connect the Dots” with my acne. FML
Today, I woke up with my face covered in blood. Turns out that yesterday at my colleague's birthday party, I got so drunk that I started yelling "Nappy time!" before falling out of my hammock and face-first onto the concrete ground. FML
Today, I woke up with a massive hangover after passing out at a wild party the night before. Apparently my friends couldn't find a marker, because I woke up with dozens of dicks drawn on my body and face in henna. I have a job interview today. FML
Today, I was at a sleepover for a friend's birthday. It was great, but after sleeping on their pull out couch, I woke up with six pimples on my face and a rash on my back. FML
Today, I woke up with my face sharpied. I live alone. FML
Today, I woke up after passing out at a very small house party. I'd set a three drink limit, but apparently nobody listened, because there were beer cans everywhere, half my stuff was on the floor, and someone had shat in my bathtub. I had to clean all of it up alone. FML
Today, I woke to find a pool of my own blood all over my pillow. Frantic to find the source of the blood, I rushed into the bathroom and tripped over my too-long pajama pants. Crashing to the floor face first, I broke my nose. Turns out I had just bitten my lip in the middle of the night. FML
Today, I fell asleep on the way to a pool party and woke up covered in sharpie swastikas and dicks. FML
Today, I came home from a crazy costume party and took a hot shower. When I opened my eyes and saw the water running from my head was bloody, I freaked out and called my friend for help. She had to remind me that for the party, I'd coloured my hair red with washable hair dye. FML
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Top comments
poopy910 8
what does your shoes have anything to do with it lol and that sucks majorly lol
TheBrianWing 0
Obviously you don't have any asshole friends. When you pass out at a party with your shoes on, it indicates that you were unintentional about losing consciousness and you get messed with. If you are found with shoes off, it indicates you just got bored and went to sleep and need to be left alone.
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Comments (187)
hk_fml 9
Ewwww that's so gross
The_Frost 0
This is why I kick off the shoes as soon as I walk into the party. Rules are rules. YDI
beberezay 0
#2 , shoes have nothing to do with being drawn on, but the passing out rule, is just an unwritten law made up as an excuse to be cruel and do things like this to people, because most people prefer to keep their shoes on, it makes many easy targets
the_boss_fml 0
has the majority of the people here never been to ONE SINGLE party? i mean really, get the the program. The shoes reference is not coming from Asher Roth, (well i hope not) but really all it is is that if you leave your shoes on it means that you are fair game to get ****** up with,essentially saying if you pass out with your shoes on, it means that you were too hammered to go back to your dorm and deserve to get ****** with/
I2OI3 0
THIS IS AN FML NOT BECAUSE YOU HAVE ACNE BUT BECAUSE YOUR FRIENDS ARE NOT REAL FRIENDS, YOU WERE PROBABLY ALREADY FEELING DOWN ABOUT YOUR ACNE AND THEY HAVE TO GO AND DO THIS. THAT'S PROBABLY WHY YOU DRUNK TO THE POINT OF PASSING OUT WITH SHOES IN THE FIRST PLACE. GO GET YOURSELF SOME NEW FRIENDS MY MAN. OH AND REMEMBER WHEN WASHING YOUR FACE, DON'T WASH TOO AGGRESSIVELY, AND ALWAYS ALWAYS MOISTURIZE, DRY SKIN WILL JUST AGGRAVATE YOUR ACNE MORE SO.
ShesCalledHENRY 0
Alright people chill. He probably wasn't referring to that, he was just saying that its just another thing to make that morning not fun. And it's an FML because he's saying that his friends not only didn't take off his shoes but they felt the need to "connect the dots". Which, as funny as that sounds, is a pretty mean thing to do. (Heh).
sjx 0
I like how people are giving acne advice like "wash your face". Yes because everyone who breaks out just skips basic hygeine.
The_Frost 0
Let me clarify the shoe rule for those of you asking about it. While at a party if you fall asleep without shoes on it means that you intended on falling asleep and it is a subtle sign that you are not to be messed with. If you fall asleep at the party and your shoes are on it flags you as fair game because you drank too much and passed out.
HummingBirdsFly 0
If you're not wearing your shoes, and pass out, it makes it seem as if you just fell asleep, and so they don't mess with you, I think. However, if you pass out with your shoes on, well. that sucks. I think that's how it is.
HummingBirdsFly 0
sorry but YDI. :)