Today, I witnessed the homeless man that visits my neighborhood placing bags containing his own poop in my trash cans. I later received a notice stating that the garbage company will not provide my residence with garbage service until I “refrain from placing bags of my own feces in the trash.” FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I woke up to a homeless man relentlessly shitting on my porch. FML
Today, I saw a kid taking a dump next to my lawn. The good news: his mother picked up the poop to discard it. The bad news: she put it in my mailbox. I now have a pile of smelly brownish tissue-wrapped goo baking under the hot sun inside my mailbox. FML
Today, my drunk neighbor couldn’t get into his apartment and thought it would be a good idea to poop in our yard. He left a pile of diarrhea under our window, and poop-stained napkins all over the lawn. FML
Today, a neighbor chose today of all days to drop off her junk in front of my condo/apartment. My relative owns and I rent. I got a letter from a different neighbor, stating that if I continue this egregious behavior of using my apartment as a trash dumpster, she will be forced to report me to the HOA. FML
Today, my neighbor finally decided that when she walks her dog, she should pick up his poop. She also decided to leave the poop-filled bags in my driveway. I confronted her about this and she claimed it's never happened. I've watched her multiple times from my front window. FML
Today, I witnessed my neighbor draining his sewage-clogged plumbing into my backyard. FML
Today, I confronted my lousy, loud, messy neighbors about the trash they throw in my yard. They responded by throwing my trash in their yard, then called the police to report me for vandalism and illegal dumping when I returned their trash. Guess who has a court appearance in two weeks… FML
Today, after weeks of asking my neighbor nicely to pick up his dog’s crap out of the common area, I got fed up and reported him to the landlord and the city. He’s now been given two options; either get rid of his dog or move out. He’s now sworn revenge on me, even though he was the one being gross. FML
Today, I opened my blinds to see the front yard littered with trash. My neighbor's cat ripped our trash bags open and smeared them all over the lawn. Since it was my turn to take out the trash this week, my family decided I would be the one cleaning up too. FML
Today, I opened my front door to go out for groceries. Lying on my doorstep was a pile of poop. A piece of paper was taped to the ground beside it that read, "Do it again and you'll get more than dog shit." I don't have the slightest clue who I pissed off, or how. FML
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Top comments
pasiphae9 5
Is your garbage can made of metal? If so, attach the live part of a cattle prod to it so when the homeless guy touches it he gets a shock. You can use gloves to pick up the lid, and detach the prod when the garbage men come round :) Nothing could go wrong, trust me.
jennam_fml 4
I agree with number four. It's no different then diapers, and it's in a bag. I put my dogs poop bags in the trash and I've never recieved a letter of any kind about it. But..How did they know it was poop in the bags? Did they rip them open to see? Wtf.
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Comments (112)
sunshiiiineXD 0
Ahahaha, that's really funny actually. They're probably like, "Why the hell does this person keep pooping in bags and putting it in the trash? He is one sick puppy." FYL.
soccerkrzy 0
#4, diapers are put in a trashbag and are typically double bagged from a hamper, so yes, it's very different than ******** in a plastic bag and putting the bag in the trashcan. VERY different. This is disgusting, and hopefully the OP beats the homeless man with a baseball bat.
poolshark 0
@#6: There would be dead raccoons and rats everywhere- ew... (Queue the vultures)
fakedsincerity 32
*cue
jennam_fml 4
I agree with number four. It's no different then diapers, and it's in a bag. I put my dogs poop bags in the trash and I've never recieved a letter of any kind about it. But..How did they know it was poop in the bags? Did they rip them open to see? Wtf.
cacheson 42
If the homeless man is using old flimsy plastic bags, I could see them ripping open just from catching on other trash and being jostled, which could result in poop being flung and smeared everywhere when the garbage truck collects it. Nobody wants to be subjected to that. Honestly... I'd see if the police could do anything about it.
live_your_life_fml 0
that's soo embarassing, fyl
mangotreats 2
this made me laugh so hard imagining that letter. not saying i necessarily believe this one, but one possible explanation: in my county all trash gets sorted before going to the landfill (by convicts) for recycling purposes.
jorygirly 0
number 15 and 4 have points. you're an epic fail at FML'S. go die in hell :)
soccerkrzy 0
15, read what was posted already and use your head FFS. Dog shit is noticeably different than human feces.
fretforyerlatte 0
i'm thinking it was in bags like the white shopping bags you'd get from the store. if there was one of those full of shit, you would definitely be able to tell. also maybe he didn't close it up well and it leaked. ewww.
Stephie_fml 0
Okay, yes, that really does suck, but at the very least, he's TRYING to be respectful by not ******** on the street like a dog. If he "lives" in a residential area with no public restrooms, what else can he do?