Today, I went to the beach with this boy I like. Not thinking it'd be anything more than a simple date, I didn't shave my downstairs. We were sitting on a towel and I laid down. Then he said, "Is there a squirrel in your pants?" FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, after going to the beach with my guy friend, I thought I looked pretty good in front of him in a bikini. Later he whispered in my ear, "You have a lot of hairs sticking out of your bottom." FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were messing around. When he slipped his hand down my pants, he scratched my pubic hair and said "scruffy, scruffy, scruffy." FML
Today, I had a date with this really cute guy. He invited me over to make dinner at his place. Eventually we end up in his bedroom to have sex. He pulls down my panties and says, "You need to shave that shit." FML
Today, my boyfriend admitted that he'd like to dress me in a squirrel suit and chase me through the forest. This was the surprising result of a discussion on how to spice up our love life. FML
Today, at the beach, my boyfriend picked me up and carried me over his shoulder. I felt my bikini top come undone in the process. I panicked and pulled down on his shorts. We were fined for indecent exposure. FML
Today, I was chatting with my boyfriend and his mates barefoot on the grass. I suddenly felt something flick across my feet, so I let out a startled scream. Turns out it was my toe hairs rustling in the breeze. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I went to the beach. I though he was being really sweet by putting sunscreen on my back as I layed on my stomach. I got home later, and felt that my back was sore. Then I saw the giant penis on my back that been burnt in. FML
Today, I was in gym class talking to a guy I like. My friend then decided to come up behind me and pants me, pulling down my underwear along with them. His only comment? "Someone needs to shave." FML
Today, I went on another date with a guy I've had a crush on for a long time. Afterwards, we went back to my place for the first time and things got heated. While taking my pants off, he recoiled and asked if I thought it was still No Shave November. FML
Today, while my boyfriend and I were on a picnic date out in the country, things got a little heated. When we were switching positions, he screamed and started running around. Turns out neither of us noticed the beehive in the tree above us until his dick got stung. FML
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Top comments
Cinn_fml 23
Well, you knew how revealing your swimsuit would be, therefore if you could see more hair than you wanted to be seen, you should have dealt with it. Though if he gets freaked out by something natural, you might want to reconsider his maturity levels. Unless he was just joking.
billywhyte 0
BAHAHA! wait....was there really a squirrel?
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Comments (253)
lidemocr 0
thought you said you LIKED the guy?? why the Hell wouldn't you shave?
sugarpeach 2
LMFAO THATS HILARIOUS!!! :D But sorry OP that sucks
sallen0046 4
It's one thing to lay out with your girlfriends in your back yard with a gigantic hairy monster in your pants. It's another thing entirely to do so when going to a public beach, most especially with a guy you like. I understand being forgetful, but damn. At least he was decent enough to make a joke. It could have been remarkably more humiliating.
karmaslave 5
What about that joke was decent? He could have just kept his big mouth shut.
Desurain23 0
shave your monkey
MrsxBillxKaulitz 5
ALWAYS shave that shit.
40ozToFreedom 0
YDI, shave that beast
luna4545 4
ALWAYS shave your downstairs..just to make it look nice in case even if you aren't getting any at least you would be prepared. and you went to the beach so I am going to assume you has a bathing suit on which means you shoulda shaved anyone! no one wants to see a hair bikini line. ydi for not at least keeping your bikini line neat.
luna4545 4
wow auto correct on phones are really annoying..
ItalianFilipino 0
why in the world would you put a squirrel in ur PANTS ?! u pervert.
RedPillSucks 33
How else is she suppose to work up an ******? She's had the squirrel for years. She's just barely met the guy. She can't very well ask him to do it!
loski87 4
lmao... you should never let your ****** get that hairy.
longtimesunshine 4
''yeh, he wants your nuts.''