Today, I went to TGI Friday's with my crush. At the end of our meal, the waitress gave us mints with the bill. He said something that made me laugh, and I began choking on my mint. After a few coughs, I finally managed to get it out. It hit him in the forehead and landed in his drink. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I went out to eat with friends. My crush was also at the restaurant with his friends. He smiled at me as I took a mouthful of food, and I choked. The waitress had to perform the Heimlich maneuver on me, while he and his friends fell off their chairs laughing. FML
Today, I went on a date with someone I really like. Midway through dinner, I felt something stuck in my teeth and, trying to be discreet, attempted to remove it. In the process, I flicked a piece of food across the table and it landed in his drink. He looked at it, then at me, then sighed. FML
Today, I went on a blind date. Everything was going great until I laughed so hard at one of his jokes that I snorted, choked on my drink, and accidentally slapped his face while trying to cover my mouth. We didn't order dessert. FML
Today, while at a restaurant with my boyfriend, a piece of ice got stuck in my throat. I couldn't get his attention until after it melted because he was busy checking in on foursquare. When he finally noticed my freaking out and I told him what had happened, he laughed. FML
Today, I was watching a romantic comedy at my boyfriend's house. During the make out scene, I decided to go in for a kiss. He apparently decided to belch at the same time. I could taste it. FML
Today, I was about to make out with my boyfriend, so I quickly swallowed my gum. Moments later, I started choking on the gum, and ended up spitting it out into his face. FML
Today, I was sitting with my crush at lunch. Trying to flirt, I tried to stare seductively into his eyes while sucking on my straw. I missed. The straw shot straight up my nose, causing me the worst nose bleed of my life. FML
Today, I went on a date for the first time in months. Over dessert, my date told a joke, and I tittered vigorously, causing me to choke and throw up all over him. FML
Today, I went to a restaurant for a second date. As we were eating, a piece of food got stuck in my teeth. I tried to discreetly remove it, but ended up spitting it across the table and onto my date's glasses. FML
Today, I went out to lunch with a couple of work buddies. Trying to be suave, I started hitting on our waitress. Not two seconds after saying, "Hey baby," I felt ice water on my balls. The guy next to me had spilled both our water glasses. FML
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Top comments
my_fml_account 2
If he still wants to hang out with you after being hit in the face by projectile mints he's clearly into you. I applaud you for pioneering new ways of finding out if someone likes you.
pizz0wn3d 0
10 points!
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Comments (115)
FFPianoDude 2
Well...was he cool about it?
TheLoneWolf87 4
YDI for eating at TGI Fridays.
xxPrettyJane 0
#22, the OP said "he" told a funny joke. the waitress was, obviously, a woman. hahah but seriously this is really funny. don't be embarrassed, it's a funny story to tell the grandkids
SiLveRStaRLIGHT 0
At least it was at the end of the meal. He probably wasn't going to be drinking much of the soda afterward anyway. As for the thing hitting his forehead... That's kind of like one of those moments you'll laugh about later. "Hahah, remember that time you choked on the breath mint at TGI Friday's and launched it at my forehead? That was hilarious!"
MorganMorphine 0
hahahahahahhahaha.
Casualt1234 0
did you give him head after?
magichateball 0
3 points?
Teekayahr 0
You don't cover your mouth when you cough?
TheDark12 0
Headshot, nice.
stephanielolz 0
I agree with 67, but this is hilarious.