Today, I went to my gynecologist's for a check-up. After the doctor checked me I went to the bathroom. It turns out the walls aren't soundproofed, because I could hear the doctor telling his assistant, "God! How did she ever find a husband?" FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I went to the gynecologist. In the waiting room they had decorative words that spelled out "Relax" and "Enjoy". FML
Today, I overheard a coworker talking about going to what sounded like a dentist's appointment. As she left later, I jokingly said, "Remember to open wide!" Turned out her appointment was with her OB/GYN, not a dentist. FML
Today, I realised that the last three people to see my intimate parts these last weeks were my beautician, my doctor and the lady who did my check up ultra sound. Oh, and I'm married. FML
Today, I was at a party. Trying to overcome my social anxiety, I was trying to take part in conversations. So, when a girl mentioned she had a doctor's appointment next morning, I blurted out: "What kind of a doctor?" Everyone stared as she responded: "A gynaecologist." FML
Today, I was getting sick of listening to the guy in the next room over getting nasty with some girl, so I called my girlfriend to see if she wanted to go get some food. Then I heard her phone ring. Through the wall. FML
Today, I was very tense as I sat in the chair for my gyno appointment, so the doctor repeatedly told me to relax, in order for her to do the routine exam. I then overcompensated and relaxed so much, I accidentally farted in her face. FML
Today, I was at the gynecologist and he was performing a routine check-up. He was a new doctor and I was just slightly uncomfortable with him. About mid-check-up, as he felt around my uterus, he said in a cartoonish voice, "Oh, it's so squishy up here." The doctor turned me into a sock puppet. FML
Today, I was sitting in the doctor's waiting room and thought that I was alone. I let rip two massive farts before realising there was a very short woman behind the computer screen at the desk. FML
Today, the walls in my house are so thin that I heard my roommate yell from the bathroom upstairs, "Hear my butthole roar." Now I’m scared to use the bathroom after him. FML
Today, at work, I had to use the bathroom to urinate. It's basically in an open plan office, so everyone can hear absolutely everything. After successfully and discreetly doing my business, I noticed a bit of dirt on the wall. I gave it a rub with my thumb on the smooth tile. It sounded exactly like a loud fart. FML
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Top comments
Palirose 22
You should have came out and said, "with that attitude it makes me wonder how you still have patients coming to see you" then promptly left.
HeyArnold91 8
Should have replied "No complaints from my husband".
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Comments (114)
xminixlovex 6
gosh, its a wonder how he still havent gotten complaints from anyone.
amifaiyaz 12
Well, considering he's a gyno, it must be pretty bad, OP... try cleaning yourself up more.
Isoldael 27
Nothing says this FML was about her not being clean. It could have been anatomically (e.g. OP being very tight) or something not even ****** related.
SirCharles83 13
Yea, us guys really hate those tight vaginas.
Isoldael 27
I'm not talking about the pleasurable kind of tight. I'm talking about "can't fit anything" kind of tight. It just came to mind after watching a documentary about special medical conditions in which a woman actually needed surgery down there cause even her period fluids couldn't pass through normally.
ilovefall10 21
Could it be that he might of been talking about another person? Just throwing it out there.
LuckyLynx7732 5
Does it have teeth or something? As long as your husband is happy I say find a new doctor and don't dwell on it.
divadevon 0
I wouldn't expose anyone else to its horribleness, make that jackass suffer for thinking his thoughts out loud and in a hurtful manner! Be his most loyal and punctual patient!
MomGirl 13
Thanks for the visual....
Ugi 27
Can he really be referring to "downstairs"? Surely if you are in a bad way down there, it's much more likely to be due to childbirth etc, which is likely to have come _after_ you found a partner rather than before! Are you sure you weren't just a bitch to him? In any case, he should realise that you can hear and what he said was highly unprofessional.
c2keeme 7
That's what I was thinking too. Just because its a gyno doesn't mean he was referring to her lady parts. She could have been ugly or smelly as a whole or just a terrible attitude.
narrowords 18
OP never said her doctor was a male. Just saying. It could have been a catty female.
DreBeezy 9
Telling "HIS" assistant.
Virginia6810 16
"...his assistant..."
titibug823 11
Actually she did specify when she said "I heard HIM tell HIS assistant"
severe_fml 3
I bet your sandwiches are extra meaty, aren't they?
ShyAnn29 15
It is possible that the doctor was talking about someone else, unless OP heard her name.
cynical4life 4
Ofcourse it is.. Quite a few people have a insecurity complex and assume that anything they overhear negative MUST be directed at them.
ShyAnn29 15
76, that's very true, I had that problem in middle school
Enslaved 38
Wow! That was incredibly rude of him. Very unprofessional. But at the same time, I'm wondering what caused him to say such a thing? :P However, if I were you, I would definitely let him know that you heard him talking about you.
Jobby 11
Wow, that's pretty unprofessional